slappy4428 said:
I go away for an hour and Jones' colon exploded...
On the other hand, this could rival Crossed Giblets of Death in flavor, texture and color, so to speak.
Very cruel, Slappy.
'Hello? Hello, is this the machine? Hello, can you pick up, 21? It's your mother....mmmooooottthhhherrrrrr.....just waiting for you to get to the phone, maybe you're in the bathroommmmmm....hhhheeeelllooooo.....pick up, dear, i need to speak with you.....yoohoo.....have you ever tried a Yoohoo, dear, I had one last week at Lou's company picnic, reminded me of the old chocolate phosphates at Ashkenaz on Devon, remember how we'd go have those dear? You'd wear those little while gloves, so precious, I don't suppose you wear white gloves any more, those were the days, ladies dressed so nicely, and I know you love those jeans with the pre-made rips, but it's just not the same, is it dear? Hello? Are you there, can please....' Click.
'Hello? I think the machine cut me off, are there dear? Anyway, I want to wish you luck on the big test tomorrow, it's really no big deal, although it does help to rub some ointment down there, so you won't be sore, can you reach there, dear? If I was there I would help, heaven knows I changed enough diapers, happy to help!'
21, trembling, whispers into the phone as she crawls get more Charmin. 'Mom, not a good time, can I call you tomorr....'
'Oh goodness, there you are, I just need one minute dear, a funny little story, do you remember Rose Walowitz, she has the daughter with the little limp, well, I saw her at MahJong last night--Rose, not her daughter--and she told me (beep) ooh, is that a call? Yours or mine? I think I have a call, can you hold on, dear, I'll just be a minute??' Click. 'Hello?" Still me, Mom. 'Oops! One minute...Hello?" Still me. 'Oh, for heaven's sake....hellooooo?'
