For current or fallen Catholics

[finishthehat]

This clip of Stephen Colbert and Jack White of the White Stripes trying to outdo each other on obscure Catholic knowledge is pretty damn funny.

http://www.rollingstone.com/videos/new-and-hot/jack-white-and-stephen-colbert-compete-in-a-catholic-throwdown-20110624

 

[dooley_womack1]

I'd click on it, but then I'd have to say 10 Hail Mary's

 

[slappy4428]

Near the end of his 20-minute weekly sermon, our longwinded priest started saying "I'm not scolding anyone" then scolded people who left after communion.
Stared back as I walked out after communion thinking if he didn't talk to hear himself speak, I'd stay.

 

[Bubbler]

Near the end of his 20-minute weekly sermon, our longwinded priest started saying "I'm not scolding anyone" then scolded people who left after communion.
Stared back as I walked out after communion thinking if he didn't talk to hear himself speak, I'd stay.

Our homily this week was contradictory. The church I go to prides itself on being open, etc., but then he goes into how getting the body and blood of Christ was akin to being in a country club (he didn't literally say that, but it was the tone I picked up). We don't just let anyone get Communion!

He also critiqued the way some people actually receive it.

Hey padre, I do communion how I want. Every church does it different.

I get my host, face the altar, do my sign of the cross and amscre.

And while I'm bitching, stop dicking around with a bunch of songs for the first five minutes and make with the readings. I'm there to worship, not do Up With People. Its bad enough I have to hold hands during the Our Father.

 

[Buck]

I'm glad I don't go anymore. I'm not holding hands during prayers. No way.
When I go to a wedding anymore, I barely recognize the Mass. I'm always thinking 'If you want Assembly of God, go join Assembly of God.'

 

[slappy4428]

I'm glad I don't go anymore. I'm not holding hands during prayers. No way.
When I go to a wedding anymore, I barely recognize the Mass. I'm always thinking 'If you want Assembly of God, go join Assembly of God.'

I hold hands with Ms. Slappy and if her 5-year-old niece is on the other side, then her. No one else. I hate that **** too. Always have.

 

[DanOregon]

Somewhere along the way in the last 30 years, the Catholic Church has gone from Mr. Rodgers to Neidermeyer.

"You're all worthless and weak!"

Do they really think people need another hour of their week being reminded how they don't measure up?

 

[slappy4428]

Nope, that was something else this week. Who said church has to be an hour long... In our case, it's like 1:20, courtesy of Father Hearmyselftalk....

 

[YankeeFan]

Its bad enough I have to hold hands during the Our Father.

LOL. This drives my father insane.

They don't do it at his home Church, but if he's on vacation or something, he'll be the one guy in the Church not holding hands.

 

[Flying Headbutt]

I was so lucky as a kid to have a pastor who "went long" if he was at 50 minutes for mass. I've grudgingly accepted an hour now, though whatever public speaking classes they take in the seminary when it comes to formulating homilies need to be improved. Another priest I had growing up, who is REALLY REALLY good, and whose homilies never seem long winded no matter how long he goes, holds himself to a five minute limit in Lent.

 

[YankeeFan]

I was so lucky as a kid to have a pastor who "went long" if he was at 50 minutes for mass. I've grudgingly accepted an hour now, though whatever public speaking classes they take in the seminary when it comes to formulating homilies need to be improved. Another priest I had growing up, who is REALLY REALLY good, and whose homilies never seem long winded no matter how long he goes, holds himself to a five minute limit in Lent.

For the most part, Mass bores the hell out of me.

As a kid, my Dad took us to 6:45 Mass every morning during Lent. I can still say the entire Mass along with the Priest. (Accept when I say it, I still mumble, "Paul our Pope, and John our Bishop.")

It's like watching a repeat of A MASH or Seinfeld episode for the 100 time.

I've seen every episode of Mass.

And, lousy Priests don't make it any better.

As for the long Masses, if they want to do a long one loaded up with music, make that one of the Masses you offer on Sunday. Make sure everyone knows the 10:30 is the long one.

The folks that don't want to spend 1:20 in Church can bang out the 0:45 version at 9:00 or noon, or on Saturday night.

 

[Flying Headbutt]

Ha, one year at Christmas the priest at my mom's church recited the exact same homily from the year before. Or two-years before, at the most, but I think it was only a year. Either way, it was word for word the same homily. I told everyone in my family then that I no longer had to go to church anymore since I had literally heard everything, and was now getting reruns in church.

 

[slappy4428]

A friend has a brother who is a priest. And that priest as a philosophy of "if you can't deliver your message in 5-7 minutes, they've tuned you out."
Have always wanted to deliver that sermon to Father Hearmyselftalk and his predecessor, Father Windbag, the converted Baptist preacher.

 

[Freelance Hack]

Concluded my three-year stint on my parish's council last night. Felt more like a six-year term. I'm hoping that'll count as my stint in purgatory.

There are changes in the mass coming later this year, starting in Advent. Most notably, the Nicean Creed goes from We to I and instead of replying "And also with you" when the Priest says "The Lord be with you," we're now supposed to say "And with your spirit."

 

[Bubbler]

Concluded my three-year stint on my parish's council last night. Felt more like a six-year term. I'm hoping that'll count as my stint in purgatory.

There are changes in the mass coming later this year, starting in Advent. Most notably, the Nicean Creed goes from We to I and instead of replying "And also with you" when the Priest says "The Lord be with you," we're now supposed to say "And with your spirit."

Not doing it.

Based on 97 percent of the homilies I've ever heard, I'm convinced every priest is a failed columnist. Broad metaphors, over-optimistic stabs at trying to make a point.

Yet ...

If I go to ceremony for another congregation, anything out of the Catholic "norm" feels totally foreign and out of place. So I'm Catholic whether I like the trappings or not.

A friend has a brother who is a priest. And that priest as a philosophy of "if you can't deliver your message in 2-3 minutes, they've tuned you out."

Fixed.

 

[YankeeFan]

Concluded my three-year stint on my parish's council last night. Felt more like a six-year term. I'm hoping that'll count as my stint in purgatory.

There are changes in the mass coming later this year, starting in Advent. Most notably, the Nicean Creed goes from We to I and instead of replying "And also with you" when the Priest says "The Lord be with you," we're now supposed to say "And with your spirit."

Not doing it.

Yeah, neither am I.

And, I agree with you on the other point as well.

I'm Catholic. I might not be a good Catholic, but it's as much a part of my identity as anything else.

 

[holy bull]

My parents went to Catholic school through college and probably could've gotten every Colbert-Jack White question right, especially the ones involving vestments and all that. Me? Zilch. And I was an altar boy through eighth grade.

Freelance, any actual rationale behind the change, or was it just more of an arbitrary thing?

When I ever get to Mass again, I can't imagine uttering anything other than the response that has been drilled into me since shortly after birth, no matter how hard I try.

 

[Freelance Hack]

I go to church regularly (as in I may miss 5-6 weeks a year, sometimes more, sometimes less), but I don't think going to Mass makes me a good Catholic or good Christian.

To me, it's more important to live your life as Jesus instructed. Love God and Love one another as we have been loved. I think it's that simple. Going to church should reinforce that message.

 

[slappy4428]

Concluded my three-year stint on my parish's council last night. Felt more like a six-year term. I'm hoping that'll count as my stint in purgatory.

There are changes in the mass coming later this year, starting in Advent. Most notably, the Nicean Creed goes from We to I and instead of replying "And also with you" when the Priest says "The Lord be with you," we're now supposed to say "And with your spirit."

Not doing it.

I will be the loudest voice saying also with you, and I will think of my grandmother who until her death in 1997 would say "Holy Ghost"

 

[dooley_womack1]

I go to church regularly (as in I may miss 5-6 weeks a year, sometimes more, sometimes less), but I don't think going to Mass makes me a good Catholic or good Christian.

To me, it's more important to live your life as Jesus instructed. Love God and Love one another as we have been loved. I think it's that simple. Going to church should reinforce that message.

This. And for me, maybe 2-3 times in the past 10 years, other than weddings.