Grease fire when they try cremating a 600lb guy

[hondo]

http://www.abc4.com/local_news/local_headlines/story.aspx?content_id=231A7EEB-BB03-4D79-B967-2EEA839D3D98

What I find the most amusing part is the line at the end where the funeral director said he would assure the man's family that their loved one "wasn't harmed."

Wasn't he also dead when they shoved him in the oven?

 

[Fenian_Bastard]

This may be the strangest story ever posted here.

 

[hondo]

Reminds me of the momma joke: "Your momma's so fat when she broke her leg, gravy poured out."

 

[Bubbler]

Dude should NOT have ****ed with Idaho's bike. He'll **** you up even after you're dead.

 

[Idaho]

Dude would have swallowed my bike seat in the ass folds. 600-pound dude hasn't been on a bike in more than 400 pounds worth of Whoppers, KFC and trips to Golden Corrall.

 

[Bubbler]

He bent the frame ... and broke your bell.

 

[JR]

They should have parboiled him first. That helps cut down on the grease.

 

[Idaho]

How big is the urn?

 

[Bubbler]

How big is the urn?

You know the Great Salt Lake? It's not great anymore.

 

[Idaho]

How big is the urn?

You know the Great Salt Lake? It's not great anymore.

Never was. The is one stinky, rotten body of water. Think of it as bathwater that's been sitting there for 1,500 years. Water (and sediment) flows in, but never flows out. It evaporates and leaves the dirt and crud behind.

 

[JayFarrar]

The story made it sound like a fire was a regular occurence when they cremated very fat people.
I smell bacon ... no I smell a plot for the next season of Rescue Me.
I can just see it now, Dennis Leary and the boys get called to a fire. They get there and it is a funeral home. The guy there explains that they were cremating a fat guy and Leary gives a knowing nod.

 

[Fenian_Bastard]

In Brainerd, they have a better idea!
"And that would be you accomplice there in the woodchipper."

 

[OnTheRiver]

In Brainerd, they have a better idea!
"And that would be you accomplice there in the woodchipper."

Watched it over the weekend. Again. GREAT show.

 

[Ace]

That story was exceedingly poorly written. Though by TV website stories, it was probably Pullet Surprise quality.

 

[User 1019]

Wonder why they didn't cut him in half and build two fires?

 

[hondo]

The story made it sound like a fire was a regular occurence when they cremated very fat people.
I smell bacon ... no I smell a plot for the next season of Rescue Me.
I can just see it now, Dennis Leary and the boys get called to a fire. They get there and it is a funeral home. The guy there explains that they were cremating a fat guy and Leary gives a knowing nod.

Make sure you sue the writers when that show appears.

 

[Fenian_Bastard]

Wonder why they didn't cut him in half and build two fires?

3Bags--
A new career opens up for you! Entrepreneurial thinking, there.

 

[Ace]

Wonder why they didn't cut him in half and build two fires?

3Bags--
A new career opens up for you! Entrepreneurial thinking, there.

Could charge double like the airlines, too.

 

[Fenian_Bastard]

"Oh, **** that, let's just burn half of Dad and bury the rest."

 

[Bubbler]

How big is the urn?

You know the Great Salt Lake? It's not great anymore.

Never was. The is one stinky, rotten body of water. Think of it as bathwater that's been sitting there for 1,500 years. Water (and sediment) flows in, but never flows out. It evaporates and leaves the dirt and crud behind.

... and the ashes of a morbidly obese man who's claim to fame is he torched up in the cremation chamber.

On second thought, I can think of worse things to be remembered for.