Killick
Well-Known Member
Saw this on one of my favorite blogs, by the brilliantly hilarious C. Trent Rosecrans, and laughed out loud. Worth a quick read. Enjoy.
http://www.thelotd.com/ctrent/blog/2009/01/30/thinking_out_loud_130
EDIT: ... and the follow-up.
http://www.thelotd.com/ctrent/blog/2009/01/30/afternoon_delight_130
http://www.thelotd.com/ctrent/blog/2009/01/30/thinking_out_loud_130
So, I enjoy playing in rec leagues and now that I'm in my old age, I don't take them seriously -- when you're 33, your softball game or whatever is for fun. I don't play for money or anything other than fun and running around.
Now, I was one of the most competitive and intense players around when I was in high school, and even in college playing intramurals. In high school, there were other coaches in the league who hated me. Hated. A year after I graduated, one of the coaches told my dad how glad he was that I wasn't playing anymore, because he could stand me (it could be that I stole his signals from first base and would yell them out, or that I threw a ball at him once... but anyway)
Well, where I'm going with this is that I play in the Fountain Square broomball league once a week. My team's not that good, but we have fun. We also play in the "beginner" division. This is a team that we played with last year, so it's not like we've never played before. That was last year. We pretty much came into this year with six games each under our collective belt. Well, we're certainly still beginners.
Now, I don't mind when other teams have people who have obviously played before, that's cool. What is annoying is when we play against teams like last night where you have one guy who thinks he's Wayne Gretzky in Game 7 of the Stanley Cup. This dude came early, had his bag with his own helmet, broomball shoes and his own stick, as well as hockey gloves. Seriously, in our league, if you have your own equipment and don't use the league-provided sticks and helmets, you probably don't belong in the beginner league. He was also doing these sprints and hockey warm-ups before the game. Our team, well, we have two or three people who may stretch. We're beginners and we're there for fun, not glory.
Thing is, dude wasn't all that good.
But that's not why I'm telling the story. I'm telling the story because a Cincinnati city councilman hit me in the balls.
Seriously, this team (which beat us 1-0 on a cheapie power-play goal by Gretzky) was serious. They were cheating and pushing our girls (it's co-ed).
As the first half of a scoreless game was going on, I got on the ground to push away a ball in front of our goal. Well, I clear the ball and as I'm on my knees getting up, City Councilman Jeff Berding took his stick and hit me right between the legs. Luckily, I had a cup on. The ball was nowhere near me and he hits me in the nuts. He also pushed over several of our girls,, which is a pretty lame move.
Yeah, that's the kind of guy we have on the city council, a guy who pushes girls and sticks guys in the nuts.
And instead of saying, "sorry" he came up to me at the end and says, "that wasn't intentional." Not, "dude, you OK? I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to hit you in the nuts and keep you from ever passing on your genetic gifts." No, he comes up to me and says, "that wasn't intentional." Jerk.
Anyway, the moral of the story is twofold: 1. City Councilman Jeff Berding hit me in the nuts and was a jerk about it. 2. always wear a cup.
EDIT: ... and the follow-up.
http://www.thelotd.com/ctrent/blog/2009/01/30/afternoon_delight_130
Well, I couldn't leave without pointing out Who Dey Revolution has my back on my jihad against Jeff Berding. I totally missed the Bengals connection and why he may have it out for me.
Of course, I might be grumpy too if I was in charge of selling premium seats for the Bengals, so maybe I should ease off the dude. Seriously, all you gotta say is "dude, sorry." Isn't that what you do if you hit another man in the balls?
And, well, not sure if it was or was not Berding, but I got word from one of my female teammates that one of the guys on that team knocked her down at the end of the game away from the ball and that she wasn't feeling good this morning. She went to the doctor today and she had a concussion and bruised neck. So yeah, Berding and his crew are girl punchers. Nice.