Greatest quote ever

[TheSportsPredictor]

No way has this sentence ever been uttered in the history of mankind until Joe "The Animal" Laurinaitis -- father of OSU linebacker James Laurinaitis -- said it to The PD's Doug Lesmerises:

"The only time I ate anything else was when Sgt. Slaughter would pick me up in his camouflage limo and buy me a hamburger at Burger King," Joe said.

http://www.cleveland.com/osufootball/plaindealer/index.ssf?/base/sports/1199611918171810.xml&coll=2

For those of you who don't know, the elder Laurinaitis used to be part of the greatest tag team of all time, The Road Warriors:

 

[Trouser_Buddah]

Umm.... really?

 

[HoopsMcCann]

ummm... no

 

[dreunc1542]

This thread is incredibly full of fail.

 

[sportschick]

It makes as much sense as this thread.

 

[mike311gd]

Back when wrestling was cool, back in the early '90s, those guys were the Legion of Doom over in the WWF.


And I've said that same quote at least twice in the last week. At least.

 

[Kaylee]

Here's something that has never been said before in the history of civilization: After I chop my **** and balls off, I'm going to shove this red hot poker up my ass.

-George Carlin-

 

[mike311gd]

Here's something that has never been said before in the history of civilization: After I chop my **** and balls off, I'm going to shove this red hot poker up my ass.

-George Carlin-

That was my first thought, too, Kaylee.

Then there are some things you never hear. That makes sense, some things you never hear. You never hear this, "dad, you really ought to drink more." Here's something you don't hear too often. "Do what you want to the girl, but leave me alone." Here is something no one has ever heard ever. Ever. "As soon as I put this hot poker in my ass, I'm going to chop my **** off." You know why you never that? Right! No one ever said that. Which to me is the more amazing thing, no one ever thought to say that before tonight. I'm the first person in the world put those words together in that particular order. First guy. Number one. Here's something you don't hear too often. "Honey, let's sell the children, move to Zanzibar and begin taking opium rectally." "Mom, mom I got a big date tonight. Can I borrow a French tickler from you?"

http://www.iceboxman.com/carlin/pael.php

 

[Steak Snabler]

No way has this sentence ever been uttered in the history of mankind until Joe "The Animal" Laurinaitis -- father of OSU linebacker James Laurinaitis -- said it to The PD's Doug Lesmerises:

"The only time I ate anything else was when Sgt. Slaughter would pick me up in his camouflage limo and buy me a hamburger at Burger King," Joe said.

http://www.cleveland.com/osufootball/plaindealer/index.ssf?/base/sports/1199611918171810.xml&coll=2

For those of you who don't know, the elder Laurinaitis used to be part of the greatest tag team of all time, The Road Warriors:

Surely, over the course of the 144-page thread below, someone can find a better quote than that from a wrestler or ex-wrestler ...

http://www.sportsjournalists.com/forum/threads/33309/

 

[Norman Stansfield]

Here's something that has never been said before in the history of civilization: After I chop my **** and balls off, I'm going to shove this red hot poker up my ass.

-George Carlin-

Damn, Carlin can still make me laugh after all these years.

 

[wickedwritah]

Still say John Drummond's "butt-naked last" riff on Carl Lewis in Atlanta was maybe the funniest thing I've ever heard, just for sheer shock value and the cadence of it.

 

[EmbassyRow]

Here's something you'll never hear anyone say: 'When he rode up on his unicycle, I knew I had to have his **** in my mouth.'

- Dave Attell

 

[Oz]

This thread is incredibly full of fail.

Honestly, with the number of times I've seen that phrase on this board recently, I thought the quote would read, "Full of fail."

 

[Mr. Homer]

this is weak

 

[Stone Cane]

WTF

what makes that quote remotely interesting?

a guy took a limo to have a burger?

that's the greatest quote ever?

who gives a flying ****

 

[poindexter]

Jesus dude, if that's the greatest quote you've ever heard, that is sad.

 

[Fenian_Bastard]

This thread, once merely incredibly full of fail, has begun to reek of unpleasantness.

 

[poindexter]

A thousand monkeys, typing at a thousand keyboards, could come up with a better quote, I'm confident.

 

[TheSportsPredictor]

Sorry, I was too busy riding around in Sgt. Slaughter's camouflage limo while eating Burger King drive-thru food to read any of these insulting comments!

 

[TheSportsPredictor]

A thousand monkeys, typing at a thousand keyboards, could come up with a better quote, I'm confident.

999 more tries!