F*** You, Salon

[Starman]

Real avocado toast is tastiest when cooked in the skillet

What next, how to make a yummy extra creamy **** sandwich?

 

[Chef2]

Avocados are disgusting.

 

[Starman]

Avocado toast is best when it's run down my garbage disposall.

 

[Shropshire Slasher]

Avocados are disgusting.

But guacamole is delicious. Go figure.

 

[Chef2]

But guacamole is delicious. Go figure.

I denounce this.

 

[wicked]

I’ve never gotten into avocados and guac. Mainly I don’t like the consistency of avocados. They seem slimy.

I’m also told that if I eat a legit avocado out west that I’ll change my mind.

 

[Spartan Squad]

I’ve never gotten into avocados and guac. Mainly I don’t like the consistency of avocados. They seem slimy.

I’m also told that if I eat a legit avocado out west that I’ll change my mind.

I live out west. My mind has not changed.

 

[cjericho]

I’ve never gotten into avocados and guac. Mainly I don’t like the consistency of avocados. They seem slimy.

I’m also told that if I eat a legit avocado out west that I’ll change my mind.

Do you like clams or oysters?

Don't get the allure of the avocado toast, but plain avocado or guac is very good.

 

[justgladtobehere]

Put a little bit of salt on a good avocado and you got something great.

 

[CD Boogie]

Funny, I'd never heard of avocado toast till this weekend, when my gf was extolling its savoriness. Like many, I enjoy guac, but avocados are overkill. They strike me like eating a stick of butter. I wanna wretch.

 

[Shropshire Slasher]

Just putting this out there.

Avocados Are Being Recalled in 6 States Over Listeria Concerns

 

[justgladtobehere]

Maybe deepfrying them will help:

Yankee Stadium
The descriptions are from the Yankees and not my own words.

Avocado Bites: Sliced avocados, deep fried and served with a habanero sauce.

 

[Chef2]

Maybe deepfrying them will help:

The equivalent of putting perfume on a turd.

 

[Chef2]

Just putting this out there.

Avocados Are Being Recalled in all 50 States Over Nastiness Concerns

 

[Chef2]

Put a little bit of salt on a good avocado and you got a waste of good salt.

 

[Scout]

An avocado by itself tastes like ****. The stuff you add to it to make gaucamole tastes awesome.

 

[OscarMadison]

A few weeks ago I ordered toast* with my breakfast. What arrived with my order were four whole wheat points with something that looked like baby **** mashed into them.

Me: Excuse me. I think your butter is...um...turning?

Waitress: (brightly) That's toast!

Me:

Waitress: ...with avocado (She pronounced it "ah-vah-keh-dah." No, I don't think she'd heard of them before working at *redacted name of Portal To Hell tm*.)

Dining Companion: The hipsters have won.

Me: The next time someone suggests secession...

*No, you don't order biscuits out. You never order biscuits out. You eat your mama's biscuits and declare they are the best you've ever had. Don't make me slap that hockey puck made by someone who doesn't love you out of your damned hand.

 

[X-Hack]

Never had avocado toast until last summer. Tried it at a coffee shop in W. Mass (theirs was topped with an egg). It was delicious. Despite all the bitching on here by angry old dudes, it's one thing millennials have gotten right.

 

[OscarMadison]

Never had avocado toast until last summer. Tried it at a coffee shop in W. Mass (theirs was topped with an egg). It was delicious. Despite all the bitching on here by angry old dudes, it's one thing millennials have gotten right.

Now get off mah lawn!

 

[Shropshire Slasher]

Here’s a story that might flip Starman into becoming a major Trumper.

America would run out of avocados in three weeks if Trump shuts down the U.S.-Mexico border