Wanna win a Pulitzer? Here's how

[JayFarrar]

How and why I get these is a bit of a mystery, but please enjoy my latest e-mail...

I will send one last email to key personel most of You know who I am but I will list a few points of the off chance this is being read by somebody that does not know who I am.

1 Elizabeth Gracen is the personifacation of evil Gracen stole millions from Myself and chartity.
Gracen took everything I had and left Me to die on the streets of Paris.

2 Gracen first screwed Clinton to obtain a Miss Arkansas crown and it is still screwing Clinton and He protects the abomanation from prosecution.

3 the amazing race was mine and 75 percent from global sales should have fed children in the 3rd world.
That abomanation Gracen sold My show to Mr Celluloid Vomit Jerry Bruckheimer.

4 I am in the hick capitol of the UK Barrow In Furness with 8 pence to My name as that abomanation Gracen spends My money.

5 I want to die I will never know happiness again Gracen raped My soul all I want to do more than die is to see that abomanation Elizabeth Gracen be sent to jail that is the spritual orgasm My soul craves.

6 whoever breaks this story is looking at a Pultizer.

7 I only ever threw My grandmothers name around to try and set up a charity never for personal gain for 2 reasons firstly it is wrong and secondly it is not that well known she had a child.

8 the greatest day of My life would be seeing that abomanation Gracen be sent to jail .

9 this is My blackberry email that is always with Me You will find everything You need on My website
www.chrishepburn.com

Chris

The Web site has more of the crazy. For the nerds, Gracen was hot in the Highlander series.

 

[Inky_Wretch]

She also posed nude for Playboy in the early 90s. Real, spectacular.

 

[Fenian_Bastard]

Oh, man, is zagoshe gonna love this site!

 

[Football_Bat]

Only problem, Clinton wasn't governor when she won Miss Arkansas. Frank White was.

 

[Fenian_Bastard]

But all the rest of it is solid, right?
Especially the part about about Mr. Celluloid Vomit?

 

[DanOregon]

Never go full-retard

 

[slappy4428]

No way this is real. Winning the Pulitzer is behind the hick capital of the UK...

 

[Football_Bat]

I've been to the hick capital of the UK. And Derby compares favo(u)rably.

 

[DanOregon]

I really hope some journo who wins one this year pulls a George C. Scott and refuses the award on behalf of the thousands of those laid off.

 

[Mizzougrad96]

She also posed nude for Playboy in the early 90s. Real, spectacular.

I don't know what she looks like now, but she was smoking hot.