Penn State hoops player arrested for public masturbation

[Captain_Kirk]

The good news: A Penn State athlete was in the library.

The bad news: He was arrested for flogging the lizard in public.

http://www.collegian.psu.edu/archive/2008/04/03/lion_faces_charges.aspx

The SID noted he wasn't a serial masturbator. Now there's some new terminology for you.

 

[Football_Bat]

If he was at Beaver Stadium, I'd understand.

 

[Chef]

The good news: A Penn State athlete was in the library.

The bad news: He was arrested for flogging the lizard in public.

http://www.collegian.psu.edu/archive/2008/04/03/lion_faces_charges.aspx

The SID noted he wasn't a serial masturbator. Now there's some new terminology for you.

Wait.

Since when was this a crime?

 

[dooley_womack1]

The Nation is raising funds for his defense.

 

[westcoastvol]

 

[alleyallen]

He'd get deliberate penalties so he could go into the penalty box. And damned if it he wouldn't, y'know ....

 

[Football_Bat]

He'd get deliberate penalties so he could go into the penalty box. And damned if it he wouldn't, y'know ....

Excellent, er, pull.

 

[outofplace]

The good news: A Penn State athlete was in the library.

The bad news: He was arrested for flogging the lizard in public.

http://www.collegian.psu.edu/archive/2008/04/03/lion_faces_charges.aspx

The SID noted he wasn't a serial masturbator. Now there's some new terminology for you.

Actually, it's not. There was a serial masturbator who really loved going to the library when I was in college. We heard about it when there was a police report about a woman took a nap in the library and awoke to find a "sticky white substance" on her jacket.

The funniest part was when the campus police caught him in the act. He refused to stop. No idea if they slapped the cuffs on before he could finish or not.

 

[Rumpleforeskin]

Good thing it wasn't THIS guy again:

 

[vonnegutnaked2]

Once you pop, you just can't stop.

 

[Rumpleforeskin]

Sports Information Director Brian Siegrist said Pringle's status with the team has not changed and that he is still participating in regular team workouts.

Siegrist added Pringle is not part of any incidents of "serial masturbation."

Captain Crunch and Count Chocula each breathed a sigh of relief at this news.

 

[Boom_70]

He dribbles too much before he shoots.

 

[Lester Bangs]

So that's not allowed? Had somebody only told me ... </costanza>

 

[ondeadline]

Stories like this tend to come in spurts.

 

[Smallpotatoes]

Penn State has a basketball team?

 

[Rumpleforeskin]

Penn State has a basketball team?

They do, but when the Big Ten tournament starts, they blow their load early.

 

[hockeybeat]

He'd get deliberate penalties so he could go into the penalty box. And damned if it he wouldn't, y'know ....

Excellent, er, pull.

 

[terrier]

He shoots...because he doesn't score.

 

[Fenian_Bastard]

There really isn't much to add here.

 

[rube]

The Crispin brothers are livid.