Being a reporter vs. being a parent

[MTM]

I posted on Facebook how it sucked to miss my son's sixth-grade awards ceremony to cover the graduation of 400 strangers and got this response from one of my former schoomates.
While our children say they understand when we skip their events for work, do they really?
Will they resent it later?
This woman has held these feelings for more than 30 years.

As you may remember, my mom was a reporter for the Podunk Press when we were kids. She worked like a slave for them and eventually became an Editor, where she worked still harder. Your post, reminded me that she wasnt there for us either.
Because of her absences, I never miss any of my daughters events. I make HER awards more important than my classroom's. I remember how horrible it was to have my mom going to a Senior Medalist Winners Dinner to cover it, and leave us home with nothing. Your fortunate if you have a wonderful wife to attend those things, but I KNOW your son wants you there to share HIS accomplishments. I also know that the joy of seeing your child be proud and happy that youre there is worth any money you may make for that graduation assignment. As a teacher I have had to make this decision a lot. Because of my experience with Mom, I ALWAYS choose my daughter over other children. I know this may be over-stepping, but consider turning down these assignments to honor your son's hard work! The job of a reporter is killer, I know. It gets into your blood and is a lot of fun. Just don't forget your kids want you at their stuff!

 

[BTExpress]

I went to sixth grade. I passed. I got a report card a week after school ended. The end.

Awards ceremony? Not in my era.

 

[Buck]

There is a happy medium between being an absentee parent and feeling attendance at every single moment/accomplishment/game/ceremony/bowel movement is of tantamount importance to a child's lifelong happiness.
The current generation of parents has lost all common sense just as the previous generation did. They're just at opposite ends of the spectrum.

 

[old_tony]

There are now Kindergarten commencements. A good parent wouldn't even have their kid participate in such garbage.

 

[expendable]

There are now Kindergarten commencements. A good parent wouldn't even have their kid participate in such garbage.

Does the kindergarten valedictorian get to say, "this is not an ending, but a beginning?"

 

[bydesign77]

I saw a car the other day that was decorated with "Congratulations, class of 2017"

Seriously? That means they don't graduate high school for another 7 years... so this was what? a sixth-grader? Really?

I don't even know what to make of that.

 

[schiezainc]

There are now Kindergarten commencements. A good parent wouldn't even have their kid participate in such garbage.

I had a graduation ceremony for Kindergarten and that was about 20 years ago so they're really nothing new.

They do suck balls though.

 

[cyclingwriter]

There are now Kindergarten commencements. A good parent wouldn't even have their kid participate in such garbage.

Does the kindergarten valedictorian get to say, "this is not an ending, but a beginning?"

He warns them of the dangers of eating to much paste.

 

[Inky_Wretch]

I read this earlier today ... http://www.1to1advantedge.com/uslacrosse/enews_June10_f_ask.html

QUESTION: "Should I go to all of my children's games?"

ANSWER: This is a fascinating question because times are so different now. Our parents came to the games when they could. If they had a commitment, it wasn't a big deal to miss the game. Now, many parents feel they are not good parents if they miss any of their children's games. So what do our kids want?

In our research on this very question, we learned that almost 100% of youth soccer-playing-kids ages, 7-14, wanted their parents to attend their games. Our kids want us to watch them play, to witness the wins and losses, the accomplishments and the disappointments. That said, it is also OK for us as adults to have our own lives, to miss a few games here or there. In fact, having a life outside of our children's sport experiences is healthy.

When I was a kid playing sports, you'd be lucky if there were 20 parents at a baseball game. Hell, parents would arrange carpool schedules to rotate not having going to the game. Now parents tsk-tsk when kids are dropped off for practice and the parents leave.

 

[Ace]

I wouldn't sweat missing a sixth-grade awards ceremony, unless your kid was named outstanding student or something.

Be there for your kid when you can. Try to make it work as much as possible.

Love them.

Don't let work become an excuse, but you've gotta work, too.

 

[Gutter]

I saw pictures on my Facebook feed yesterday of a 4K graduation, cap and gown and all.

Are you serious?

 

[novelist_wannabe]

I wouldn't sweat missing a sixth-grade awards ceremony, unless your kid was named outstanding student or something.

Be there for your kid when you can. Try to make it work as much as possible.

Love them.

Don't let work become an excuse, but you've gotta work, too.

Thanks, Ace, for being a voice of reason here. While raising our children is the single most important thing most of us end up doing, it doesn't have to be the only thing. There needs to be a happy medium. I'd posit that our children learn some modicum of time management from the example we set. So long as we don't miss so many things they feel like we've completely forgotten them, they'll grow up well. And we might, just might, retain our sanity.

 

[Buck]

We were discussing a similar topic at home several weeks ago.
I think many parents of our generation do it intentionally because so many employers won't question it any more.
Each parent takes his/her child to school every morning. There is never any carpooling because that gives each parent an excuse to be at work 30 minutes late on a regular basis.
Same with picking kids up after school, dropping them off/picking them up at practice, etc.
I never hear of parents setting up carpools for kids in the same class, on the same team, etc.

 

[Dyno]

We were discussing a similar topic at home several weeks ago.
I think many parents of our generation do it intentionally because so many employers won't question it any more.
Each parent takes his/her child to school every morning. There is never any carpooling because that gives each parent an excuse to be at work 30 minutes late on a regular basis.
Same with picking kids up after school, dropping them off/picking them up at practice, etc.
I never hear of parents setting up carpools for kids in the same class, on the same team, etc.

All but one of my friends has their kids in a carpool for school/activities. Interesting that your experience is the opposite.

 

[old_tony]

Are there any kids in America who actually walk to school anymore?

 

[Buck]

We were discussing a similar topic at home several weeks ago.
I think many parents of our generation do it intentionally because so many employers won't question it any more.
Each parent takes his/her child to school every morning. There is never any carpooling because that gives each parent an excuse to be at work 30 minutes late on a regular basis.
Same with picking kids up after school, dropping them off/picking them up at practice, etc.
I never hear of parents setting up carpools for kids in the same class, on the same team, etc.

All but one of my friends has their kids in a carpool for school/activities. Interesting that your experience is the opposite.

I even know one coworker who insists on staying home when one of his kids is sick, although his wife is home and doesn't work.
Well, he used to insist on it. They're divorced now, but up until a couple of years ago he stayed home every time one of his kids was sick.

 

[Starman]

Are there any kids in America who actually walk to school anymore?

Twenty miles, in the roaring snow, uphill both ways, the way we did when we were kids?

And that was after milking the cows of course.


Back to the point of the thread: Whenever you possibly can, choose your kids. "The company" doesn't give a sizzling steaming **** about you and will happily lay you off the very first second it can, leaving you and your kids out in the cold.

**** the company. Be there for your kids. Do what you have to do to not get fired; that's it.

 

[Inky_Wretch]

Are there any kids in America who actually walk to school anymore?

No, because Nancy Grace and local TV news have convinced the nation children will be abducted if they're out of sight of their parents for more than one minute.

 

[outofplace]

I am amazed and frustrated by all of the bull**** events for kids. Hell, my daughter's preschool had a graduation, which is completely ****ing ridiculous.

Here's the problem. She knows about it. Her friends are going. She's going to want to go and she's going to want mom and dad there.

She had a "field day" this morning, which was a fairly stupid and annoying event. That said, the look on her face when she saw me there made me very happy I had moved my schedule around to attend.

Not sure what's right or wrong. Each parent has to make that decision for himself or herself. Just saying that despite the fact that some of these events are stupid, my 6-year-old cares about them. That's enough to make me or my wife want to be there for her for as many of these stupid events as we can.

 

[Mizzougrad96]

My son graduated from pre-school last week. We went to the ceremony, watched him sing "Kindergarten Here I Come" in full cap and gown. To celebrate, we gave him a balloon and a Bumblebee Transformer and he was as happy as a kid can be. Total money spent: $14.

It was a lot of fun and we got a lot of cool video and pictures from it.

The first graduation ceremony I participated in was high school.

Was this one meaningless? I guess, but I still would not have missed it for anything.