Parents ... again

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Calvin Hobbes

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Joined
Feb 14, 2007
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323
So today was my day off. But like many of them, I was at the office anyway, working on stuff that needed to be done.

An e-mail comes in. Yeah, from a parent of a senior player on an unbeaten local football team. I'll paraphrase:

You know, East Podunk has a 7-0 football team, and you guys never give us any coverage. Last week, we beat West Podunk and you gave our story and photo a lousy spot on Page 4B. This happens all the time. I always look for our games in Saturday's paper and they're always so hard to find because our teams never gets its due. We're always inside or buried.

Our boys have worked so hard all summer and into the season ...


You've all seen these before. I know I shouldn't have done it, but the mom included her name and phone number. I called, introduced myself, told her I'd received her note and that I wanted to let her know that we have given East Podunk quite a bit of play on our sports front. I told her that of East Podunk's seven games to date, the first four all made the front page, and two or three of them were the main package.

But the last three were against three teams with a combined record of 4-17, and East Podunk won each by a huge margin. Last week, the Spelunkers won, 49-7, in a game played almost an hour away. As I mentioned, we had a story and photo, but it was from a sister paper in the other town, but it was a bylined story, and there were quotes from East Podunk, which is sometimes not the case when we get stories from other papers.

Anyway, as soon as it was clear I wasn't calling to apologize for dissing her son's football team, she threated to hang up if all I was going to do was argue with her. We spent about 10-15 minutes on the phone, as I tried to explain why a 49-7 game against a team with one victory did not merit front-page coverage, and she simply talked over me at every turn, changing the subject every time I made a valid point.

Essentially, her argument became, well, even if the stories were on the front, the type was too small. Well, since the copy type is all the same, I assume she meant the headlines. Then, after I explained that the same team (we have roughly 20 teams we cover extensively and another 20 "fringe" teams) is not going to get a 100-point headline every week, her argument became, well, the stories you people write suck because you never mention the seniors or the linemen. Her exact quote was, "You only write about the people who score."

Well, duh. The people who score get press. But the fact is, we have written about their line. Apparently, just not enough, and not about the "right" lineman.

You guessed it. Her kid is a ... wait for it ... senior lineman.

Anyway, this was the first reader contact I've had since I returned to work after burying my mom last week. Cancer. They found it in the liver, and it had started in the pancreas. I'm still feeling guilt about covering a bunch of meaningless games all these years when I could have been spending time with her. I'm needlessly beating myself up, but ... that's what I do. I know those are feelings a lot of people have when someone close to them dies, but I have them, and they feel real to me.

I know calling the lady was a bad idea. But since she submitted her rant as a letter-to-the-editor, I had to verify it before it ran, and she was just so wrong on a couple of things I felt she needed to know a little about what we do and how we do it. Should I follow up at all, given that I wasn't able to reach her on any level on the phone? I have a lengthy e-mail typed and ready to go, but I'm not sure it would help.

Sure felt good writing it, though.
 
i wouldn't send the email personally...you tried to explain it to her and she didn't want to go for it. she doesn't want anything but for someone to jump up and say, you are absolutely right. logic is out the window and you have more important things to do than to try and convince some mother that her son is good at what he does so she can convince him.

poor is a state of mind.
 
We got an email from a parent who feels our coverage is costing their son a chance at scholarship. The teams is 0-5.

No lie.
 
ostentatious said:
you tried to explain it to her and she didn't want to go for it. she doesn't want anything but for someone to jump up and say, you are absolutely right. logic is out the window and you have more important things to do than to try and convince some mother that her son is good at what he does so she can convince him.

Last fall, after picking our soccer all-stars, had a lady call me and ask how I go about picking the all-stars. I said first thing, I talk to all of our coaches since I don't get to see very team. I look at stats and then I trust my eyes for what I've seen on the field. Her daughter was neither mentioned by the coached, showed up as anything special in stats and she didn't even play (I'm told it was an injury) in the three playoff games I saw her team play.

Lady proceeded to tell me my ways of picking all-stars were all wrong and I needed to ... wait for it ... talk to the coaches to see who the best players were.
Also, her daughter had become emotionally distressed and was thinking about quitting soccer because she did not make my all-star team.

It was at that point I said, thanks for calling, I've got things I need to do.

I'm all for debating and talking with people about what they think is coverage worthy or about all-stars because I understand people get upset. But if you're not going to listen, I'm done with you.
 
ostentatious said:
i wouldn't send the email personally...you tried to explain it to her and she didn't want to go for it. she doesn't want anything but for someone to jump up and say, you are absolutely right.

Seconded. You did everything you needed to do, CH, and from what you posted, you did it with professionalism and respect despite not receiving much in return. Good on you. If SeniorMom wants to continue kvetching, let her do the work.

You have enough on your plate. Let her sort out her own issues.
 
Sounds like you handled the situation perfectly, Calvin, which is no easy task. (I've had my share.)

And God Bless you and your family.
 
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As usual, I come here and get good advice. I knew you guys would come through.

Now, I also have this little problem about being a Cleveland Browns fan ...

Naw, I'm not a sucker for lost causes or anything ... ::)

Seriously, thank you for your caring comments. It's been a difficult couple of months for my family. Heck, going back to August of 2004, We've lost one of my best friends (and a co-worker), my brother, an aunt, my stepfather and now my mom.

It seems silly now that I'd be worried at all about what some football mom from East Podunk thinks.
 
I got an e-mail and a phone call from a parent asking me to write a feature about her daughter, a middling cross country runner -- after the girl broke her foot. The daughter, apparently, is feeling really down at the moment and a story would be nice.
 
RedHotChiliPrepper said:
Also, her daughter had become emotionally distressed and was thinking about quitting soccer because she did not make my all-star team.

Do these parents have no shame?

Here's what I would have done:

"Hey, mom, can I talk to your daughter?"

"Sure, why do you want to talk to her now?"

"Because, for the first time, I've heard a kid was going to quit their team since they didn't make the Daily Fishwrap All-Star Squad. It's rather newsworthy, and I think we should confirm this fact with the player."

"But ... "

"Maybe I should call the coach, too. You know, he'd be interested in whether he's losing an all-star caliber player, right?"

"Joanie doesn't want to talk right now."

"Thank you." Click.
 
Calvin, sorry to hear about your mom. Just remember that at the end of the day, it's just a damn job to do.
 
The Last Boy Scout said:
Calvin, sorry to hear about your mom. Just remember that at the end of the day, it's just a damn job to do.

my sentiments on both counts.
 
Clever username said:
I got an e-mail and a phone call from a parent asking me to write a feature about her daughter, a middling cross country runner -- after the girl broke her foot. The daughter, apparently, is feeling really down at the moment and a story would be nice.

Did you tell her to buy her a freakin' PONY instead?

We've gotten several letters to the edtior about kids not making all-area teams, which we don't pick thank God. The coaches do. One dad even put his kids stats in with his letter. Never mind the team was 5-23 and most of his stats were padded against JV players in the second half.

I love parent calls and emails because we pretty much tell them they don't know what they're talking about. We just had a letter bitching we covered one team's senior night and not the other local team's. She even counted the number of pics we had online. Jesus on the Throne I'll be glad when soccer is over.

Soccer parents, naturally, are the worst I've worked with. But I also had the parent, of a lineman, bitching we never put lineman pictures in the paper or mention them. What's sad is, the kids could mostly care less.

And Calvin, sorry to hear about your mom.
 
Calvin, condolences for your loss.

A paper in our area runs a column of peoples phone calls. they can say what they want without having to leave their name. I don't know how many papers run something similar, but this was from today's issue...italics mine verbatim:

Why are there never any pictures or articles regarding our local high school cheerleaders. They deserve to be recognized. They are all lovely girls who practice hard and are required to attend the games, including those out of town. How about a picture of both schools with names and a mention of them when writing up sports articles for our local newspaper, as it used to be. Would be very nice.

I feel for you guys...I really do
 
Bob Slydell said:
What's sad is, the kids could mostly care less.

Ain't that the truth. Half of them are embarrassed when their parents talk to the media and beg and plead for a story.
 
jfs1000 said:
We got an email from a parent who feels our coverage is costing their son a chance at scholarship. The teams is 0-5.

No lie.
At that point you call out the parents and go "just confess... you don't want to pay for little Johnny's tuition, do ya?"
 
Calvin Hobbes said:
An e-mail comes in. Yeah, from a parent of a senior player on an unbeaten local football team. I'll paraphrase:

You know, East Podunk has a 7-0 football team, and you guys never give us any coverage. Last week, we beat West Podunk and you gave our story and photo a lousy spot on Page 4B. This happens all the time. I always look for our games in Saturday's paper and they're always so hard to find because our teams never gets its due. We're always inside or buried.

Our boys have worked so hard all summer and into the season ...

Well, since she wrote it as a letter to the editor, you should just run it, with an editor's note pointing out all the times they have been on the front page, thus debunking her claims and calling her bs for all to see. Slightly vindictive thing to do? Sure. Well-deserved? You bet.
 
Calvin Hobbes said:
As usual, I come here and get good advice. I knew you guys would come through.

Now, I also have this little problem about being a Cleveland Browns fan ...

Naw, I'm not a sucker for lost causes or anything ... ::)

Seriously, thank you for your caring comments. It's been a difficult couple of months for my family. Heck, going back to August of 2004, We've lost one of my best friends (and a co-worker), my brother, an aunt, my stepfather and now my mom.

It seems silly now that I'd be worried at all about what some football mom from East Podunk thinks.

What's this about a "problem" being a Cleveland Browns fan???

:)
 
A paper in our area runs a column of peoples phone calls. they can say what they want without having to leave their name.

I hate those columns. What a waste of space.

Newspapers require letters to the editor to be verified, but anyone can call an anonymous "hotline" and spew bull****, and newspaper managers jack off about it because it's "feedback." But an unsigned letter or email gets tossed in the trash can.


Calvin, sorry to hear about your loss.


The idea about asking to speak to Britneigh because she's so upset and plans to quit the team is great.
 

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