I'm sick and not coming to work ever

[RossLT]

So for the last couple of weeks at my place of work we have had a rash of people calling in sick. My position at this company is somewhat predicated on the fact that when people call in sick I pick up more hours. I have a schedule every week but it tends to fluctuate and because of this I get an extra $100 a week. The problem I have is when I am forced to stay an extra four or five hours because someone didn't show up.

After talking to one of the supervisors, he told me that the issue is that the background check at this place is so stringent that we hire people who are straight out of high school because they have nothing on their background that could be detrimental. In his words, "These kids have absolutely no work ethic and no idea that when they are scheduled for a shift they are supposed to be here."

Not looking for any sympathy, just needed to vent about work. Thanks for listening, if you did ;)

 

[Write-brained]

Do you work at a factory?

 

[RossLT]

Nah, security at a place that does bioresearch

 

[Gomer]

So you're telling me Pimply McPimplehead is guarding the door to the Ebola room? Lovely.

 

[RossLT]

So you're telling me Pimply McPimplehead is guarding the door to the Ebola room? Lovely.

No he is calling in sick and making me do it ;)

 

[Write-brained]

What, no bioresearchsecurity.com?

I'm just kidding. You're more than welcome to post here. I was just assuming you worked at a newspaper and thought for a second, 'boy JRC is really hitting the skids ...'

 

[imjustagirl]

That sucks, Ross. Just keep your iPod filled with 'Pac. :D

 

[Overrated]

Hey Ross, will you guys buy my semen? I need gas money, and my semen is pretty incredible.

 

[imjustagirl]

Dude, even your internet soulmate won't go near your semen.

 

[RossLT]

What, no bioresearchsecurity.com?

I'm just kidding. You're more than welcome to post here. I was just assuming you worked at a newspaper and thought for a second, 'boy JRC is really hitting the skids ...'

Christ, I am glad I have your permission. I should have told you that the paper that I used to work at decided they no longer needed me.

Ass.

 

[Gomer]

So you're telling me Pimply McPimplehead is guarding the door to the Ebola room? Lovely.

No he is calling in sick and making me do it ;)

That might be for the best then. Unless you're this guy:

 

[Gomer]

By the way, do NOT type Simpsons teen into the google image search without safesearch on. Dear ****ing God.

 

[Overrated]

Dude, even your internet soulmate won't go near your semen.

Just because I had to chase her around the hotel room doesn't mean I didn't shoot her in the small of the back. Besides incredible semen, I also have impeccable aim.

 

[imjustagirl]

Gross.

 

[Write-brained]

What, no bioresearchsecurity.com?

I'm just kidding. You're more than welcome to post here. I was just assuming you worked at a newspaper and thought for a second, 'boy JRC is really hitting the skids ...'

Christ, I am glad I have your permission. I should have told you that the paper that I used to work at decided they no longer needed me.

Ass.

I didn't intend to be, honest, but whatever. A tiger can't hide its stripes, I guess.

 

[Overrated]

You're clearly an asshole, W-B.

 

[Write-brained]

You're clearly an asshole, W-B.

You're just mad that I won't buy your semen.

 

[RossLT]

What, no bioresearchsecurity.com?

I'm just kidding. You're more than welcome to post here. I was just assuming you worked at a newspaper and thought for a second, 'boy JRC is really hitting the skids ...'

Christ, I am glad I have your permission. I should have told you that the paper that I used to work at decided they no longer needed me.

Ass.

I didn't intend to be, honest, but whatever. A tiger can't hide its stripes, I guess.

It's all good. I used to be a sportswriter but then my paper decided I was no longer suited for it. It's OK I make more money doing security.

They pay for semen? Maybe I should save it instead of flushing ;)

 

[Overrated]

You're clearly an asshole, W-B.

You're just mad that I won't buy your semen.

I didn't know you wanted it. Hell, you can have it for free.

 

[Write-brained]

What, no bioresearchsecurity.com?

I'm just kidding. You're more than welcome to post here. I was just assuming you worked at a newspaper and thought for a second, 'boy JRC is really hitting the skids ...'

Christ, I am glad I have your permission. I should have told you that the paper that I used to work at decided they no longer needed me.

They pay for semen? Maybe I should save it instead of flushing ;)

Ass.

I didn't intend to be, honest, but whatever. A tiger can't hide its stripes, I guess.

It's all good. I used to be a sportswriter but then my paper decided I was no longer suited for it. It's OK I make more money doing security.

I can't be mad at a fellow Wire fan.

You make more money even with reduced hours? Wow.

The real question is, do they let you carry a gun?