The 2008 SJ/Neiman-Marcus Gift List

[21]

Proving once again God has a magnificent sense of humor, Neiman's launches its annual gift catalog during the worst week the US economy has had in a gazillion years.

This year, we feature a wedding valued at $1,300,000....a thoroughbred riding stable for only $10 million....a limited 7-Series BMW (only 31 being made, in honor of the 31st bday of the 7 Series).

But we begin with a gift for each of you...every registered SJ member will receive one of these custom lifesize lego creations, made to look just like you:

Send Webby your pictures so we can get started!

$60,000 each.

http://www.neimanmarcus.com/store/sitelets/christmasbook/fantasy.jhtml?cid=OCBF9_NMO3602&cmCat=christmas&icid=NMCBpage75

 

[slappy4428]

you have a link so we can thumb through?

 

[21]

That would be like giving presents without wrapping them. Be patient.

 

[Boom_70]

Proving once again God has a magnificent sense of humor, Neiman's launches its annual gift catalog during the worst week the US economy has had in a gazillion years.

This year, we feature a wedding valued at $1,300,000....a thoroughbred riding stable for only $10 million....a limited 7-Series BMW (only 31 being made, in honor of the 31st bday of the 7 Series).

But we begin with a gift for each of you...every registered SJ member will receive one of these custom lifesize lego creations, made to look just like you:

Send Webby your pictures so we can get started!

$60,000 each.

Will they be anatomically correct ?

 

[21]

Whatever you put in the picture. These people are professionals.

 

[slappy4428]

That would be like giving presents without wrapping them. Be patient.

How would we know what presents to give if we dont know what's available...

 

[21]

Next, for the first five SJ-ers who can spin a ball in their finger while riding a bike:

Your chance to play with the Harlem Globetrotters. Uniform included. Value: $110,000.

http://www.neimanmarcus.com/store/sitelets/christmasbook/fantasy.jhtml?cid=OCBF9_NMO3604&cmcat=Christmas&icid=NMCBpageF82

 

[21]

That would be like giving presents without wrapping them. Be patient.

How would we know what presents to give if we dont know what's available...

I AM GIVING THE PRESENTS!

 

[21]

For someone who has a really really big backyard....Jack Nicklaus will come over and design your golf course!

(LINK FOR SLAPPY http://www.neimanmarcus.com/store/sitelets/christmasbook/fantasy.jhtml?cid=OCBF9_NMO3603&cmcat=Christmas&icid=NMCBpageF76 )

For a million dollars, Jack will study topography, aerial photos, and landscape maps for the site, then send his team to survey the property. He'll create a formal design plan and color renderings for up to three holes and a practice area, depending on the size of your back forty. Your construction crew builds from it, with supervision from Jack's world-class design team (the same team pursued by premier club owners worldwide). Now to sink the winning putt; when your course is finished, the Golden Bear himself will stop by to play the first round with you, personally. More? He'll sign his club and ball for your collection and throw in a custom set of Nicklaus clubs, including a personalized bag.

You're worth it.

 

[21]

Now this thing....

...I don't know what this is for, but it costs $100,000. Looks like a good place for banned posters or people with writers block.

http://www.neimanmarcus.com/store/sitelets/christmasbook/fantasy.jhtml?cid=OCBF9_NMO3601&cmcat=Christmas

 

[slappy4428]

That would be like giving presents without wrapping them. Be patient.

How would we know what presents to give if we dont know what's available...

I AM GIVING THE PRESENTS!

Oh.
Well. You don't have to do that, what with the economy in the tank and Boom's Yankee Stadium seats going up 1,000 percent.

 

[21]

Actually, they're going up about 2000%, what with all the hedge fund guys bailing on their skybox commitments, but that's no reason you should suffer.

 

[slappy4428]

I'm good with that. As long as it's a give that doesn't keep on giving; which I'm sure you can get in Dallas, but not Neiman-Marcus

 

[21]

I'm good with that. As long as it's a give that doesn't keep on giving; which I'm sure you can get in Dallas, but not Neiman-Marcus

Guess where we're going for Thanksgiving, my friend.

 

[slappy4428]

You and me or you and Boom?

 

[21]

One way or another, you are always with us on Thanksgiving, slappy.

Here's a hint, and a gift for my idiot brother who knows nothing--NOTHING--about football, so I am putting this is his backyard just to **** him off:

An entire Cowboys Texas Stadium end zone. Our exclusive package also includes the VIP treatment for the last regular season Cowboys game in Texas Stadium. Your crew gets pre-game photos in your zone with Jerry Jones, a luxury suite for the game, and a once-in-a-lifetime post-game tailgate party on your soon-to be new backyard (with the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders, no less). There's also autographed memorabilia from Cowboy legends, and a VIP package to attend the opening of the new stadium in 2009. Better yet, the Jerry Jones family and the Cowboys organization will generously donate the entire purchase price to The Salvation Army®.

http://www.neimanmarcus.com/store/sitelets/christmasbook/fantasy.jhtml?cid=OCBF9_NM-1WD3&cmCat=christmas&icid=NMCBpage70

 

[slappy4428]

Wait. You aren't going to be at 21's Mom's house for Thanksgiving?

Who's going to fill us in on Linzee and poopys?

 

[21]

Wait. You aren't going to be at 21's Mom's house for Thanksgiving?

Who's going to fill us in on Linzee and poopys?

(Moment of silence)

We are all going. All of us. To Dallas, where none of us lives. Mom, Lou, LinZee....to Dallas, where my idiot brother lived when I lost a drunken bet at my cousin's wedding.

I would have bet my left breast that Lou could not get under that limbo stick.

But thank God I only bet Thanksgiving in Dallas. I need to save the rest of the story.

 

[21]

I think this one goes to BYH.

EVERY 45 to hit the Billboard 100 from 1955-1990! 18,400 records! Juke box sold separately.

$275,000, juke box sold separately.

http://www.neimanmarcus.com/store/sitelets/christmasbook/fantasy.jhtml?cid=OCBF9_NMO3597&cmCat=christmas&icid=NMCBpage71

 

[Tommy_Dreamer]

One way or another, you are always with us on Thanksgiving, slappy.

Here's a hint, and a gift for my idiot brother who knows nothing--NOTHING--about football, so I am putting this is his backyard just to **** him off:

An entire Cowboys Texas Stadium end zone. Our exclusive package also includes the VIP treatment for the last regular season Cowboys game in Texas Stadium. Your crew gets pre-game photos in your zone with Jerry Jones, a luxury suite for the game, and a once-in-a-lifetime post-game tailgate party on your soon-to be new backyard (with the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders, no less). There's also autographed memorabilia from Cowboy legends, and a VIP package to attend the opening of the new stadium in 2009. Better yet, the Jerry Jones family and the Cowboys organization will generously donate the entire purchase price to The Salvation Army®.

http://www.neimanmarcus.com/store/sitelets/christmasbook/fantasy.jhtml?cid=OCBF9_NM-1WD3&cmCat=christmas&icid=NMCBpage70

That wouldn't **** me off at all :D