Strippers don't really like you

[Dirk Legume]

Never have been to one. No moral objection, just hasn't happened. However,

I coached high school softball for a couple years while my kid played. She told me recently that three...THREE, are dancing at what would be considered the local club ('bout 30 minutes away)


And all I could think was "eeeeeewwwww"

 

[Bodie_Broadus]

Several of us went to a crappy place in the sticks outside of Eugene, Ore. Even the cabbie was hesitant to take us there, but we talked him into it.
This was just some room that got converted into a strip joint on the weekends. A small "stage" with a couple of spotlights above it. Folding chairs set up.
The girls were awful and there was a loudmouth dude in the back. He kept shouting things at the girls.
"Hey Bertha, lose some weight then come back."
Next one:
"You look like you 14 but your tits look like they're 70."
Then the line of the night.
This girl with a fantastic body and long, gorgeous brunette hair down to her ass takes the stage.
Loudmouth says, "Hey baby, you're totally fine. What are you doing in a dump like this?"
It was so funny that she started laughing ... and she had no teeth.
Loudmouth says, "Dammit, honey. What happened to you? Did you give head to a chainsaw?"
This being in the middle of lumberjack country made it that much more funny.


One more: A place where I used to work had a yearly ritual. Everybody who worked on the night before Thanksgiving went to a strip club near the airport for an early preview of breasts and thighs.

In the sticks outside of Eugene? I have been to Eugene quite a few times and there isn't much around it.

 

[MTM]

Went to a strip club with a bunch of co-workers around 1994. There were about 10 of us who were mid-30s or younger and our mid-50s sports editor.

A dancer came out who was clean-shaving in the days before that became so popular and our curmudgeon of a sports editor exclaimed "shaved *****. I like shaved *****."

That freaked us out more than anything else we saw that night.

 

[Huggy]

Whoever mentioned Hooters earlier was spot on. Some real losers in those places who think those girls "dig" them, as the t-shirts proclaim.

Strip joint business in Toronto is a shadow of the state it was in even 10 years ago. They used to be licenses to make money, now they attract too many cops due to the drugs and prostitution going on within and of course there are all the unsavoury organized crime types who remain prevalent in that business. The larcenous prices have conspired to keep everyone but NBA players out of them.

Last time I was in Montreal I was shocked at how lame the strip joints were compared to the last time I was in the peeler bar capital of North America.

Friend of mine dated a stripper some years ago. Lovely girl, she actually asked him out. She didn't drink or do drugs due to some medical issues (her sister was also a stripper and a complete mess) and yes, she was only doing it to get money to go to some veterinary college in the US. They eventually broke up because their schedules weren't even remotely compatible and my buddy said he still hears from her occasionally. She did get to college in the US and now works at some clinic in Virginia.

 

[SoCalDude]

Chez Paree in Montreal is/was one block from the Sheraton where lots of teams stay.
I was covering the 1993 Stanley Cup Final. On the off-day between Games 1 and 2, went with a couple of guys to Chez. The Chicago Cubs apparently were having a team meeting there that night.
A week later, back in Montreal, the night before Game 5, couple of us went to Chez again. This time, the Cincinnati Reds were having a team meeting there.

 

[dooley_womack1]

They serve fuzzy cookies at strip joints now? Damn, been a while since I've been to one.

We have one here that offers an all-you-can-eat spaghetti bar.

I've long maintained that if you eat meals at a strip club, you're too far gone. That was after I saw my best friend take advantage of the local place that offered breakfast specials before NFL Sundays.

You've obviously never been to Rachel's in West Palm Beach. They're known for their steaks. You can also have your car washed while you're there. Nice touch, I thought.

And if you need a last-minute holiday gift ... might I suggest:

"Have your car washed." Is that what they're calling it nowadays?

 

[Batman]

Chez Paree in Montreal is/was one block from the Sheraton where lots of teams stay.
I was covering the 1993 Stanley Cup Final. On the off-day between Games 1 and 2, went with a couple of guys to Chez. The Chicago Cubs apparently were having a team meeting there that night.
A week later, back in Montreal, the night before Game 5, couple of us went to Chez again. This time, the Cincinnati Reds were having a team meeting there.

Been reading Doug Glanville's book the last few weeks, and there's a chapter where he talks about Montreal being one of the great baseball road towns. Great clubs (strip and otherwise, I assume), restaurants, the works, and none of the paparazzi you'd find in the U.S. He said a trip to Montreal was "like visiting another planet." No wives or girlfriends were allowed to come, and it often led to some winning streaks because guys would bond over the debauchery.

 

[PCLoadLetter]

Several of us went to a crappy place in the sticks outside of Eugene, Ore. Even the cabbie was hesitant to take us there, but we talked him into it.
This was just some room that got converted into a strip joint on the weekends. A small "stage" with a couple of spotlights above it. Folding chairs set up.
The girls were awful and there was a loudmouth dude in the back. He kept shouting things at the girls.
"Hey Bertha, lose some weight then come back."
Next one:
"You look like you 14 but your tits look like they're 70."
Then the line of the night.
This girl with a fantastic body and long, gorgeous brunette hair down to her ass takes the stage.
Loudmouth says, "Hey baby, you're totally fine. What are you doing in a dump like this?"
It was so funny that she started laughing ... and she had no teeth.
Loudmouth says, "Dammit, honey. What happened to you? Did you give head to a chainsaw?"
This being in the middle of lumberjack country made it that much more funny.


One more: A place where I used to work had a yearly ritual. Everybody who worked on the night before Thanksgiving went to a strip club near the airport for an early preview of breasts and thighs.

In the sticks outside of Eugene? I have been to Eugene quite a few times and there isn't much around it.

There used to be some rathole titty bars out West 11th, on a more industrial edge of town. Wouldn't surprise me if it was out there.

On my 21st birthday we went to one in downtown Eugene. It was after midnight in the middle of the week. There were two dancers working. One was about 30 pounds overweight, and the other was about 20 pounds underweight. We stayed about 5 minutes, but I can't hear "Urgent" by Foreigner without picturing a pudgy, small-breasted bottle blonde half-heartedly shaking her ass.

 

[Smasher_Sloan]

The strippers have a dim view of Hooters. There was a thread about that. I couldn't find it, but while looking I found these interesting subject lines:

<i>Traveling -- What Do You Tell Your Family?

Bisexual from Dancing?

Can I Get HIV If He Ejaculates Through Pants?

Itchy butt rash

Argh! Neighbor saw me at work

She pooped onstage.</i>

Very interesting place.

 

[Huggy]

When Hooters was in my town it was next door to one of the sketchier strip joints in town, allowing some of the ladies to do a little double duty.

Buddy of mine is a cop here and said one of the craziest things he ever walked in to was getting a call about a disturbance at a joint called the Latin Quarter (gone now, but not far from Chez Huggy) when a guy walked in with some buddies and saw his wife on stage!

 

[qtlaw]

Here's one of my sadder memories of single life.

I used to play hoops at a pretty nice athletic club where many of the members were professionals (loved getting a steam shower after playing, then grabbing a Heinken to watch the local game). Well I asked one of my buddies (who I did not think was ugly) to go grab some dinner on Friday night and he said he was going to a "gentlemen's club" for a steak; I asked him why and he said:

"I think she likes me."

Seriously, no kidding. I was dumbstruck.

 

[McNuggetsMan]

At my brother's bachelor party, we ended up at a strip club in the Poconos called The Pleasure Dome. It was a real dump, but it was BYOB so we were able to bring a keg into the club.

Nearly as soon as we get in there, one of the strippers comes up to us and says "I am a bad girl. I don't like giving dances. I'd rather just give blow jobs."

"Really" my brother's friend says. "How much?"

Her - "$50"

Him - "Exactly how many dicks are in your mouth every night?"

Her - "You don't have to worry about that because I always use a condom."

Him - "Really? That's where you draw your moral line? If you'll suck **** for $50. I am sure you are the kind of girl will do it bareback for $200."

Her - SLAP!

It was an awful, dirty, sketchy club but the people watching was amazing and after we had made it clear that nobody our group wanted an STD, they left us alone to drink from our keg and laugh at the other customers.

 

[NickMordo]

Best Quote:

"I let a female customer get totally naked and give me and her bf a lap dance... seemed like no brainer... you just paid me to do nothing."

 

[Moderator1]

I would add a story or two. But I know nothing about the topic. Nothing. At all.

 

[dooley_womack1]

C'mon; the Queen doesn't read the board

 

[DanOregon]

I wonder if there is a strip club DJ website.

I wonder if strip clubs have rivalries.

I wonder if a strip club manager ever begged a dancer not to quit - saying her career was a calling?

 

[cyclingwriter]

I wonder if there is a strip club DJ website.

I wonder if strip clubs have rivalries.

I wonder if a strip club manager ever begged a dancer not to quit - saying her career was a calling?

A lot of strip clubs have ties to organized crime...so yeah on rivalries. There was a famous case where I used to work about a manager who was gunned down while driving on the Interstate.

 

[dooley_womack1]

My strip club's dancers try just as hard as anyone else's!

 

[Evil ... Thy name is Orville Redenbacher!!]

Here's one of my sadder memories of single life.

I used to play hoops at a pretty nice athletic club where many of the members were professionals (loved getting a steam shower after playing, then grabbing a Heinken to watch the local game). Well I asked one of my buddies (who I did not think was ugly) to go grab some dinner on Friday night and he said he was going to a "gentlemen's club" for a steak; I asked him why and he said:

"I think she likes me."

Seriously, no kidding. I was dumbstruck.

Was it Dennis Rodman who used to eat - I am loathe say dine - at Scores?

There a few clubs in Va. that have a $20 cover and its BYOB... Near JMU I think.
Used to be anyway.

 

[Double J]

My best friend, who in his younger days could and did land any girl he wanted, ended up nailing a peeler one night. She was from Quebec and he told us the next day that she had started moaning and talking in French while he was pounding her; he didn't have a clue of what she was saying, but he said it was the hottest and wildest **** he'd ever had. Gave a bit of hope to the rest of us, for a very short while.