How often do you socialize?

[Ace]

Do 12 step meetings count as socializing?

Asking for a friend

 

[LongTimeListener]

When I saw American Beauty in 1999, when I was in my 20s and didn't have kids, the most hilarious scene was when Spacey all of the sudden started working out to impress the chick. I went into the office talking and laughing about the exaggeration of it. All the guys in their 40s asked what was so damn funny about that and why I thought that was exaggerated.

Now that I'm in my 40s, I've seen a lot of friends start workout regimens.

 

[Webster]

I seem to lean on old familiar ways.

 

[Bronco77]

Lots of things going on out there.

I entered my teen years in the early '70s and recall things being really active then. Spouse-swapping was becoming a craze, and my parents told a lot of stories about friends and co-workers who joined in (the best might have been about the ultraconservative, authoritarian football coach whose wife left him for a female lover). This was around the time Fritz Peterson and Mike Kekich made big news as wife-swappers with the Yankees.

 

[Dick Whitman]

Well, this thread has taken an interesting turn.

 

[LongTimeListener]

Well, this thread has taken an interesting turn.

I was just thinking about this.

But, if I'm being honest, I look forward much more to the nights of coed socializing and it's probably related to what you're talking about too. Talking to women (usually in bars) was something we could all take for granted before we got old and the kids came along, but now it's kind of rare and one of the things you can identifying as missing from The Way It Was. And there is something about the interactions that sparks things, even if it's all innocent.

 

[Dick Whitman]

I was just thinking about this.

But, if I'm being honest, I look forward much more to the nights of coed socializing and it's probably related to what you're talking about too. Talking to women (usually in bars) was something we could all take for granted before we got old and the kids came along, but now it's kind of rare and one of the things you can identifying as missing from The Way It Was. And there is something about the interactions that sparks things, even if it's all innocent.

I remember Jeff Pearlman writing in one of his confessional blog entries that the biggest thing he missed about being single wasn't necessarily the womanizing per se, but rather social unpredictability. That rang pretty true to me.

 

[Buck]

15-18% of Americans cheat on a spouse.
It always surprises me but it shouldn't.

I've only been married once, and it's only been four years now, but have not engaged in such behavior.
Before I was married, I never engaged in such behavior while in a committed relationship.

Although, I did engage in such behavior with women who were married/in a committed relationship.

 

[Dick Whitman]

15-18% of Americans cheat on a spouse.
It always surprises me but it shouldn't.

I've only been married once, and it's only been four years now, but have not engaged in such behavior.
Before I was married, I never engaged in such behavior while in a committed relationship.

Although, I did engage in such behavior with women who were married/in a committed relationship.

I never did because I have no interest in being murdered.

 

[CD Boogie]

When I saw American Beauty in 1999, when I was in my 20s and didn't have kids, the most hilarious scene was when Spacey all of the sudden started working out to impress the chick. I went into the office talking and laughing about the exaggeration of it. All the guys in their 40s asked what was so damn funny about that and why I thought that was exaggerated.

Now that I'm in my 40s, I've seen a lot of friends start workout regimens.

15-18% of Americans cheat on a spouse.
It always surprises me but it shouldn't.

I've only been married once, and it's only been four years now, but have not engaged in such behavior.
Before I was married, I never engaged in such behavior while in a committed relationship.

Although, I did engage in such behavior with women who were married/in a committed relationship.

Did you grab em by the *****? Go at them like a *****? sorry, but your comment made me think of Trump going after married women. Which was repulsive to Mitt Romney -- until he wanted to be SOS.

 

[da man]

I seem to lean on old familiar ways.

Thanks, Paul. I've heard that about you.

Still crazy, are you?

 

[Ace]

15-18% of Americans cheat on a spouse.

That seems low. I guess the positive is that if about half of marriages end in divorce in most cases they aren't cheating.

Rags or someone may have to check my math, though.

 

[LongTimeListener]

I never did because I have no interest in being murdered.

The worst threat I ever heard was from the woman who said if her husband ever cheated, she'd move out and leave the kids with him.

 

[SFIND]

Once every couple of months with a few friends. I keep up with the people I care to keep up with in my 20,000ish population town usually by running into them every couple of weeks. Never been a partier (hate the taste of alcohol), and I can't begin to describe my hate of church groups and those type of people (being agnostic is only a small reason why). Being outside those two groups, I've found socializing hard.

I don't really feel a need, either, as I usually work six days a week and am out of the house all seven. I encounter plenty of people each day.

 

[Buck]

Did you grab em by the *****? Go at them like a *****? sorry, but your comment made me think of Trump going after married women. Which was repulsive to Mitt Romney -- until he wanted to be SOS.

Nothing like that.
I'm not proud of my behavior, and it has been a long time since.
I used to distinguish the difference to myself - that I was not a bad guy because I was not the one who was in a marriage/relationship.
But in the end, there is no real distinction. I was still choosing to participate in infidelity, even if it was someone else's infidelity.

 

[Ace]

The worst threat I ever heard was from the woman who said if her husband ever cheated, she'd move out and leave the kids with him.

The advice my boss gives in such matters is:

"If you're going to set the house on fire, don't tell them you're going to set the house on fire -- just set the house on fire."

 

[CD Boogie]

Nothing like that.
I'm not proud of my behavior, and it has been a long time since.
I used to distinguish the difference to myself - that I was not a bad guy because I was not the one who was in a marriage/relationship.
But in the end, there is no real distinction. I was still choosing to participate in infidelity, even if it was someone else's infidelity.

People who cheat are like people who gossip. If a person will gossip to you, they will gossip about you. And if a person will cheat with you, they'll cheat on you. That's been my experience, anyway.

 

[da man]

I was going to amend my original statement to note that I play tennis twice a week -- Tuesday nights in drills held by the local tennis center (though mostly the same group of people shows up) and Sundays with a bunch of teenagers participating in a junior tennis program (the instructor/sponsor invited me to join their practices when I told him I was tired of just hitting with the ball machine). But given the direction this thread has moved, I feel like I'm getting off topic.

 

[LongTimeListener]

da man, you could rescue it by running down the latest trends in tennis skirt fashion.

 

[typefitter]

I never know more what it feels like to be a hot woman than when I coach my kid's soccer team. A committed dad who's a bit sporty and good with kids? CAT NIP FOR SOCCER MOMS. I have a friend who jokes about dressing down to do it so he doesn't feel so much like meat.