Hard Rock Park

[Michael Echan]

Janis Joplin's Vomit Comet -- A popular ride with the over-50 set, it hasn't been oiled for a while which accounts for that rusty screech patrons hear throughout the ride. Rated mediocre at best, nobody under 30 appreciates this old, unattractive coaster.

Along those lines: The Bon Scott Upside Down Rollercoaster.

Which is conveniently located next to the Highway to Hell.

 

[BigRed]

The Prince Lake Minnetonka Ride. Only, that isn't Lake Minnetonka.

Free pancakes afterward, too.

 

[BigRed]

Lynard Skynard Flight Simulator -- Alabama residents "fly" free.

They're actually from Jacksonville, Fla., which might as well be south Alabama.
And half the people who get on don't survive the flight. You don't know which won't make it - which is part of the fun.

 

[Rumpleforeskin]

The Stiv Bators Frogger Experience -- You're going to have to cross a major road to enjoy this crowd-pleaser. So be sure to look left, look right and OHHHH! Don't forget to look to the left again.


The Jeff Buckley Experience: Be sure to keep your head above water in this wet thrill ride.

 

[dooley_womack1]

The kids can have some messy fun in the Grunge Black Tar Pit

 

[Hammer Pants]

I heard you can rent rooms by the hour in the B-52's Love Shack.

 

[dooley_womack1]

But is the tin roof rusted?

 

[Hammer Pants]

But is the tin roof rusted?

For an extra $20.

 

[Huggy]

The park announced today that a reality show is being filmed to find a replacement for the star of the Hangin' Out with Michael Hutchence attraction.

 

[dooley_womack1]

Yeah, I think Bob Geldof's ride was edging it out.