From our friend Jones

[wicked]

Came across this piece on Apple News from our friend Chris Jones, who always made this an interesting place to hang around.

The Night My Marriage Fell Apart

I don’t know if the gift link works more than once? My wife gifted it to me earlier.

1. I don’t think I’d be able to be that honest in prose.
2. Jones was one of the good ones. He nurtured writers here, he met us randos a few times, he was an asset to this board. To read that he was miserable af while that was all going on makes me a little sad. Did he know that he was appreciated by us?

Book’s now in my cart, of course.

 

[John]

I read this a few days ago. Has stuck with me since. Tough to read, but wonderfully written (of course). Hope Chris is doing well.

 

[MileHigh]

Man, that was a tough read and a lot of similarities for what I went through. But, thankfully, no kids involved. For me, it was 20-plus years ago and in the past few months, things have been dredged up (not by me) to have to relive some stuff. I hope he is well.

 

[BYH 2: Electric Boogaloo]

Reading Jones, I understand what it's like to be a ballplayer who peaked at Double-A. I like to think I've always been amongst the best writers in any group. This guy is on an entirely different level.

 

[PCLoadLetter]

I miss him around here. Brilliant guy. Hope he’s doing well now.

Tough read, but beautifully done, of course.

 

[Here me roar]

Was just wondering where Chris Jones was these days. I'll have to put that book on my list.

 

[UNCGrad]

Jones is certainly among my all-time favorites, and he's been back on Twitter lately to promote this. Hoping to get by our local bookstore to buy it today.

 

[Cosmo]

Used to send stories to Jones for feedback and I loved his brutal honesty. Helped make me a better writer. Will read this later when I get some free minutes.

 

[Inky_Wretch]

While I still love this place, I loved it more when Jones and Pierce (and IJAG) were here.

 

[BurnsWhenIPee]

That piece was brilliant.

 

[SixToe]

That story was gutting. Damn. Hopeful he's still on the good track and moving forward.

WTF is it with spouses who cheat, text and don't think they'll get caught? Everything is connected. Texts show up in weird places - car screens, laptops, TVs. My brother's lying POS skank ex-wife did this and that's how he found out, because she left her Apple watch on the kitchen counter and he saw it buzzing at midnight or some weird time. Found months and months of texts.

 

[BYH 2: Electric Boogaloo]

That was also a reminder none of us are very far from the abyss, especially those of us have chosen this field...one that makes it more challenging to support a family, financially or otherwise.

 

[waterytart]

While I still love this place, I loved it more when Jones and Pierce (and IJAG) were here.

And jgmacg/azrael.

 

[BYH 2: Electric Boogaloo]

That story was gutting. Damn. Hopeful he's still on the good track and moving forward.

WTF is it with spouses who cheat, text and don't think they'll get caught? Everything is connected. Texts show up in weird places - car screens, laptops, TVs. My brother's lying POS skank ex-wife did this and that's how he found out, because she left her Apple watch on the kitchen counter and he saw it buzzing at midnight or some weird time. Found months and months of texts.

My sister's first marriage finished falling apart when my brother-in-law found compromising pics on her phone as it was laying unlocked at the house (might have even been the kitchen counter, that feels familiar). He suspected something was up, picked up the phone and there you go.

 

[I Should Coco]

That was also a reminder none of us are very far from the abyss, especially those of us have chosen this field...one that makes it more challenging to support a family, financially or otherwise.

That was a very good (and sobering) read. It reminded me of something else I've noticed as I moved from a parent swamped with children's activities and their active lives to a 50-something empty nester: it can be easy for a couple to bury or ignore problems by completely focusing on their jobs, their kids or a combination of the two.

Thankfully -- thank God -- my wife and I have navigated that change from active parents to one phone call and a few texts a week parents pretty well, but I know several couples our age who weren't as fortunate. I've seen it happen with retirement, too. When the life situation changes, if you don't have a strong foundation and open communication with your partner, it can go south in a hurry.

 

[BYH 2: Electric Boogaloo]

That was a very good (and sobering) read. It reminded me of something else I've noticed as I moved from a parent swamped with children's activities and their active lives to a 50-something empty nester: it can be easy for a couple to bury or ignore problems by completely focusing on their jobs, their kids or a combination of the two.

Thankfully -- thank God -- my wife and I have navigated that change from active parents to one phone call and a few texts a week parents pretty well, but I know several couples our age who weren't as fortunate. I've seen it happen with retirement, too. When the life situation changes, if you don't have a strong foundation and open communication with your partner, it can go south in a hurry.

My future wife's parents split up a few months after she moved out with me. (My fault) Once she was out of the house, they didn't know what to do. My father-in-law said he wanted a divorce and my late mother-in-law--an absolute GOAT mother-in-law but someone prone to emotional meltdowns--responded by tearing up the wedding dress she hoped her daughter would someday wear on her wedding day. That pretty much ended any chance at a reconciliation. Even my father-in-law, since remarried, acknowledges he didn't think he really wanted a divorce and that he thought they just needed therapy.

The really sobering thing is my wife and I are older now--and not by a little--than her parents were then. Even with a 13-year-old running us ragged (in the best of ways), it's a reminder to stay vigilant and alert and attentive to one another--especially when the husband is a dumbass writer with bad hours and worse pay.

A couple years ago, we went to a therapist to narrow down our daughter's anxiety diagnosis. During one session, the therapist (a complete whackadoodle I wouldn't trust to change a litter box, but that's a topic for another time) asked to speak with my wife and I alone. It didn't take my wife long to blurt out she didn't feel we spent enough time together as a couple. I didn't think we were headed for trouble, but I'm glad she said it. We make a concerted effort now to have semi-regular dinner dates and to have a movie or TV night with the phones put away when our daughter is out.

 

[TheSportsPredictor]

Pretty convenient that he logged into her computer right when she was texting her side piece AND that he remembered what the texts said 10 years later.

 

[wicked]

While I still love this place, I loved it more when Jones and Pierce (and IJAG) were here.

Pierce was here?

(I didn’t know that was officially officially confirmed. We all had suspicions.)

 

[wicked]

Pretty convenient that he logged into her computer right when she was texting her side piece AND that he remembered what the texts said 10 years later.

Are you saying he’s FOS?

He said he kept all the evidence. Pretty easy to look that stuff up.

 

[MileHigh]

Are you saying he’s FOS?

He said he kept all the evidence. Pretty easy to look that stuff up.

Yeah, I think it said he did screengrabs and kept everything.