Coming out in Grand Style

[boots]

A married co-worker had a party Saturday night. And the biggest shock was that he picked that party to say he was gay. Definitely killed a festive mood. Now, people at the gig are treating him differently. While we won't be taking showers together after a game of handball anymore, I still consider him a friend.
I have been trying to defend his actions to a few coworkers but they just don't seem to understand that being gay is his choice. Am I wrong in defending a good friend?

 

[Sea Bass]

No, of course not. But details please. You said he's married. Was this how his wife found out, or did she already know?

And I'm relieved you're talking about a co-worker and not yourself, because that would have made the "turning down a romp in the hay" thread a giant sham.

 

[alleyallen]

A married co-worker had a party Saturday night. And the biggest shock was that he picked that party to say he was gay. Definitely killed a festive mood. Now, people at the gig are treating him differently. While we won't be taking showers together after a game of handball anymore,  I still consider him a friend.
I have been trying to defend his actions to a few coworkers but they just don't seem to understand that being gay is his choice. Am I wrong in defending a good friend?

It might also help to know whether or not your friend WANTS you to defend him. If he does, by all means, defend away, just like you would someone wrongly accused, etc. And good courage shown by your friend.

 

[boots]

No, of course not.  But details please.  You said he's married.  Was this how his wife found out, or did she already know?

And I'm relieved you're talking about a co-worker and not yourself, because that would have made the "turning down a romp in the hay" thread a giant sham.

I believe she knew but she acted pretty cool about it, especially when his signicant other was there. As for a Romp inthe Hay, it will soon be updated.

 

[Riddick]

not to threadjack, but I was thinking about doing something similar for my last day of work. Throwing a giant party the last night of work, then announcing that I'm leaving.

 

[Just_An_SID]

A married co-worker had a party Saturday night. And the biggest shock was that he picked that party to say he was gay. Definitely killed a festive mood. Now, people at the gig are treating him differently. While we won't be taking showers together after a game of handball anymore,  I still consider him a friend.
I have been trying to defend his actions to a few coworkers but they just don't seem to understand that being gay is his choice. Am I wrong in defending a good friend?

There has to be an an anal sex joke here somewhere.

My God. . . it's Boots posting this.  I can't wait until the rest of SportsJournalists.com wakes up.

This thread may be headed for 40+ pages.

 

[fmrsped]

A married co-worker had a party Saturday night. And the biggest shock was that he picked that party to say he was gay. Definitely killed a festive mood. Now, people at the gig are treating him differently. While we won't be taking showers together after a game of handball anymore,  I still consider him a friend.
I have been trying to defend his actions to a few coworkers but they just don't seem to understand that being gay is his choice. Am I wrong in defending a good friend?

So did you give him a reacharound or is that simply for your lady friend?

 

[boots]

A married co-worker had a party Saturday night. And the biggest shock was that he picked that party to say he was gay. Definitely killed a festive mood. Now, people at the gig are treating him differently. While we won't be taking showers together after a game of handball anymore,  I still consider him a friend.
I have been trying to defend his actions to a few coworkers but they just don't seem to understand that being gay is his choice. Am I wrong in defending a good friend?

So did you give him a reacharound or is that simply for your lady friend?

Everything is not a joke. This is a good guy who is being treated like **** inmy opinion because he came out at his own house party.

 

[Armchair_QB]

Has he met your neighbor?

 

[Trey Beamon]

A married co-worker had a party Saturday night. And the biggest shock was that he picked that party to say he was gay. Definitely killed a festive mood. Now, people at the gig are treating him differently. While we won't be taking showers together after a game of handball anymore,  I still consider him a friend.
I have been trying to defend his actions to a few coworkers but they just don't seem to understand that being gay is his choice. Am I wrong in defending a good friend?

Awww, now you guys have something else in common. Did you recommend any lubricants?

 

[Ace]

A married co-worker had a party Saturday night. And the biggest shock was that he picked that party to say he was gay. Definitely killed a festive mood. Now, people at the gig are treating him differently. While we won't be taking showers together after a game of handball anymore, I still consider him a friend.
I have been trying to defend his actions to a few coworkers but they just don't seem to understand that being gay is his choice. Am I wrong in defending a good friend?

So did you give him a reacharound or is that simply for your lady friend?

Everything is not a joke. This is a good guy who is being treated like **** inmy opinion because he came out at his own house party.

If you were defending your friend, you'd still let him loofa your back in the shower. And some would argue whether being gay is his choice or not.

Why are you even asking, though. Of course you should defend your good friend. If people ***** and say the party was inappropriate, why not ask them how they would handle telling their friends and co-workers they were gay. Put them on their heels, boots.

 

[Football_Bat]

I don't really care if someone is gay or not.

But the guy had a coming-out party, for crying out loud. He knew what he was doing.

So he and Boots work with a bunch of knuckle-draggers. He should've thought of that beforehand.

 

[alleyallen]

A married co-worker had a party Saturday night. And the biggest shock was that he picked that party to say he was gay. Definitely killed a festive mood. Now, people at the gig are treating him differently. While we won't be taking showers together after a game of handball anymore,  I still consider him a friend.
I have been trying to defend his actions to a few coworkers but they just don't seem to understand that being gay is his choice. Am I wrong in defending a good friend?

So did you give him a reacharound or is that simply for your lady friend?

Everything is not a joke. This is a good guy who is being treated like **** inmy opinion because he came out at his own house party.

If you were defending your friend, you'd still let him loofa your back in the shower. And some would argue whether being gay is his choice or not.

Why are you even asking, though. Of course you should defend your good friend. If people ***** and say the party was inappropriate, why not ask them how they would handle telling their friends and co-workers they were gay. Put them on their heels, boots.

I'd take that even further and ask them how they'd want to be treated if they had a party celebrating ANY life or social change, like getting a divorce, getting married, having a child, etc.

 

[Montezuma's Revenge]

I don't care one way or another about my friends' sexual preferences, but I would find it tacky if someone invited me to a party to make that announcement.

Just seems to me an inappropriate way to handle it, especially with a wife in the picture.

I think a better way to handle it would have been to tell chosen friends one-on-one. Then have the coming out party, if need be. That way you're not putting your friends in a needlessly uncomfortable situation. Very selfish. I mean, what are people there supposed to say to the wife? "Don't feel bad; I'd still hit you.''

 

[Lester Bangs]

A married co-worker had a party Saturday night. And the biggest shock was that he picked that party to say he was gay. Definitely killed a festive mood. Now, people at the gig are treating him differently. While we won't be taking showers together after a game of handball anymore,  I still consider him a friend.
I have been trying to defend his actions to a few coworkers but they just don't seem to understand that being gay is his choice. Am I wrong in defending a good friend?

I always find the "won't be taking any showers with him anytime soon" thing funny. Am I the only one who would not be freaked by knowing a gay guy was in a group shower in a gym setting? Now, am I going to invite a gay guy ... or any guy ... to shower with me at home? Of course not. But I guess I've struck out with enough chicks to not worry that I'm going to be super attractive to gay guys. I'm betting I repulse them as much as I repulse most females.

Anyway, always stunned that people are stunned when others come out. I understand the "married" thing -- the whole living a lie, to a large degree -- but why does anybody care? People have to deal with their actions and I am pretty sure this guy knew that going in. Some would be turned off simply because he was gay. Others will be turned off by the venue he chose. He's probably to the point where he wouldn't mind knowing who his real friends are. but maybe I'm reading in too much here.

 

[alleyallen]

When was the last time any of you showered with another man or a group of men? If you didn't know someone in the group was gay, why would things be any different if it turned out one of them WAS gay?

 

[Flash]

That's my question, Daddy. What changes about the shower situation now? My goodness, just because your buddy is gay doesn't mean he wants you. Men, I swear. Listen, not everybody wants you.
Signed,
Someone who has showered with her lesbian teammates and never once got hit on

 

[Hank_Scorpio]

No, of course not.  But details please.  You said he's married.  Was this how his wife found out, or did she already know?

And I'm relieved you're talking about a co-worker and not yourself, because that would have made the "turning down a romp in the hay" thread a giant sham.

You don't actually believe anything on that thread happened do you?

 

[alleyallen]

That's my question, Daddy. What changes about the shower situation now? My goodness, just because your buddy is gay doesn't mean he wants you. Men, I swear. Listen, not everybody wants you.
Signed,
Someone who has showered with her lesbian teammates and never once got hit on

"He didn't give you GAY, did he?"

 

[Lester Bangs]

That's my question, Daddy. What changes about the shower situation now? My goodness, just because your buddy is gay doesn't mean he wants you. Men, I swear. Listen, not everybody wants you.
Signed,
Someone who has showered with her lesbian teammates and never once got hit on

Personally, I know the biggest issue with showering is that I just really don't need another guy's johnson that close to me. What sexual orientation that johnson is matters very little.