When dog shoots man, it's news

[HanSenSE]

At least in Nebraska.

Dog accidentally shoots someone outside Nebraska convenience store while owner was inside shopping​

MSN

 

[Slacker]

At least in Nebraska.

Dog accidentally shoots someone ​

outside Nebraska convenience store ​

while owner was inside shopping

MSN​

I certainly think we have our next Jeff Daniels movie here.

 

[Shropshire Slasher]

Ho Lee Fuk, don't mess with Texas!
cc: YankeeFan, GrandmaQuant.

Another Republican attorney charged
with bestiality after screwing the family dog

Just when you thought you had heard it all.

A 56-year-old Houston man has been charged with felony bestiality after his wife caught him raping the family dog on surveillance cameras she installed inside their home.

Steven Swain a die heart MAGA was reportedly recorded engaging in sexual acts with the family dog, Shipley. His wife installed the cameras after becoming suspicious. She later provided the footage to authorities and removed the dog from the home for its safety.

Swain has been charged, and an arrest warrant has been issued.
The dog has since been removed from the residence and is safe with the wife.

He had it cummin'.

H-TINE !!

 

[DanOregon]

Die-hart? Woof.

I had an editor who drummed it into me, if a dog is named in a story - you need to mention its name.

 

[dixiehack]

Why are we declaring it accidental without attribution or quote marks in the headline?

 

[waterytart]

Dogs are capable of forming intent about all sorts of things, but not shooting people. So if this isn’t an accident, did the dog’s owner somehow manipulate this into happening?

 

[dixiehack]

If your mother says the dog shot you accidentally, check it out.

 

[justgladtobehere]

"Police said the dog, whose breed has not been revealed"

Genius.

 

[Slacker]

"Police said the dog did not respond to requests for more details."

 

[HanSenSE]

Any truth to rumors may be part of that radicalized pack from. South Dakota "Cricket's Avengers?"

 

[Shropshire Slasher]

INTERVIEWER: "Hey Doggy, what's the reaction been like?"

DOGGY: "Ruff."

 

[fossywriter8]

Colleague once quoted a bird in a story.
"Quack," said the duck. "Quack, quack."

 

[Baron Scicluna]

If the dog doesn’t sit, you must acquit.

 

[UNCGrad]

I remember when Barbaro, the horse, died, my buddy ran the story on a 1-column rail, and inserted a mug of Barbaro's headshot, complete with "Barbaro" cutline. Still makes me laugh.

Also, our Podunk newspaper's highest-clicked story in the early days of the internet was the headline: "Boy sick; turtle blamed".

Good times.

 

[MTM]

Another dog gone wild