Shoplifting Porn: Not the correct way to spice the rum

[Songbird]

(Insert joke here)

The first comment probably sums it up:

So many things wrong here. 1. Why is she stealing with her kid right there? 2. How did a kid getin a liquor store anyway? 3. Why is she stealing cheap brandy instead of a high name brand? 4.How deep is that pvssy that a square pint bottle can fit in it? 5. Does she know that if and when her young son gets caught stealing that he'll say " I saw my mama stick a pint of E & J in her privates and I thought I wouldn't get caught"? Fathers and mothers, be in your kids lives and pray incessantly together.


Read more: http://www.balleralert.com/forum/topics/florida-woman-caught-stealing-liquor-by-hiding-it-up-her-you-know#ixzz3IOaumERV

 

[The Big Ragu]

The only reason she got caught was that she was having her period. She got caught red handed.

 

[Boom_70]

Having trouble with accepting "Baller Alert" as legitimate news source.

 

[Riptide]

Jameis now says he was misquoted:
"I said Tuck it! Just tuck it in there! See?"











"And some crab legs, too."

 

[Batman]

The only reason she got caught was that she was having her period. She got caught red handed.

It was a bottle of Johnny Walker Black label when it went in.
It came out as Johnny Walker Red.

 

[BitterYoungMatador2]

Brings new meaning to the phrase "box wine."

 

[Batman]

So many things wrong here. 1. Why is she stealing with her kid right there? 2. How did a kid getin a liquor store anyway? 3. Why is she stealing cheap brandy instead of a high name brand? 4.How deep is that pvssy that a square pint bottle can fit in it? 5. Does she know that if and when her young son gets caught stealing that he'll say " I saw my mama stick a pint of E & J in her privates and I thought I wouldn't get caught"? Fathers and mothers, be in your kids lives and pray incessantly together.

1. Camouflage. When store security busts her, she'll start screaming bloody murder "HOW CAN YOU DO THIS WITH MY SON HERE!?" in the hopes of causing enough of a scene that she can either slip out or they'll just kick her out without calling the cops.

2. Walked through the door? Liquor stores aren't bars, as far as I know. It was many years ago, but my dad used to take me with him on beer runs, or have me come inside if I was with him and he stopped on the way home for a 12-pack.

3. Cheap brandy comes in plastic bottles and are more malleable?

4. I'm wondering if that's even the biggest thing she's shoved up there this week. It's like a three-bedroom condo up in there. The phrase "hot dog in a hallway" comes to mind. Hell, she probably has a wine cellar in her ass.

5. This poor kid has a story that's going to make all his buddies in Cellblock D laugh their asses off some day.

 

[Vombatus]

What if she were sticking that up the wrong hole?

 

[heyabbott]

maybe she's just putting it in her shopping cart, along with a case of paper towels and a gallon of milk

 

[Riptide]

What if she were sticking that up the wrong hole?

What if you are?

 

[Deeper_Background]

Was this the same girl who said she would blow the Lakers if they won 47 games this year?

Porn Star Sadie Santana Is ‘100% Serious’ About Her Offer To ‘Blow’ The Lakers http://www.brobible.com/sports/article/sadie-santana-offer-blow-lakers/

 

[Vombatus]

Hoochy Coochy!

 

[User 1019]

Coochy Hooch

 

[cyclingwriter2]

The only reason she got caught was that she was having her period. She got caught red handed.

That was inspired