Maid of Dishonor

[hondo]

Maid of honor goes on epic binge at wedding reception ...

Maid of Honor Drinks Bottle of Fireball, Punches Best Man, Steals Car, Almost Runs Him Over

The Vodka Sam of weddings.

 

[Dick Whitman]

My brother punched two groomsmen at his wedding. Plus he and I got into it during pictures, though no punches were thrown.

Great idea to have your wedding at a distillery.

 

[TyWebb]

Before even clicking the link, I thought to myself "This happened in either Florida or Tennessee."

S - E - C! S - E - C! S - E - C!

 

[Vombatus]

I was hoping for a milkmaid.

 

[User 11148]

My brother punched two groomsmen at his wedding. Plus he and I got into it during pictures, though no punches were thrown.

Great idea to have your wedding at a distillery.

No ****! Wow ...

Only disagreement I can recall during our wedding weekend was between me and my wife. Looking through the wedding album from her (older) brother's, I'd noticed there were pics of everyone together the day after. Turns out that he, his bride and the rest of the family went out for a big brunch the next day. "To hell with that," I said. "I will have seen and smiled at and been nice to a lifetime's worth of people by then. The last damn thing I want to do is get back together for a dressed-up-nice Sunday brunch."

She and I ultimately compromised. We got together with everyone the day after our wedding for a dressed-up-nice Sunday brunch.

 

[MisterCreosote]

Pretty sure I've told this story here before, but I told my soon-to-be sister-in-law to eat a **** at one of my weddings.

 

[playthrough]

Before even clicking the link, I thought to myself "This happened in either Florida or Tennessee."

S - E - C! S - E - C! S - E - C!

No question, that had Florida Man written all over it. Though a nice twist to have Florida Woman.

 

[QYFW]

My father knocked out his nephew for insulting the bride at my oldest brother's wedding.

 

[MisterCreosote]

My grandfather's incredibly racist second wife spent one of my weddings complaining about "all the Mexicans," despite the fact that the bride and her family were Central American.

 

[LongTimeListener]

Our DJ left his post every 15-30 minutes, and as the night wore on we realized it was to do coke in the bathroom. When people complained that he wasn't playing the songs they requested -- after he actually distributed request cards -- responses included "Lady, would you kindly do me the honor of shutting the **** up?" (to one of my mom's friends) and "Are you the ****ing groom?" (to a groomsman).

Finally I got dragged into an angry conversation with him, but various men stood between us and ushered him out.

 

[Dick Whitman]

No ****! Wow ...

He was Groomzilla. He was angry at me because my kid got dust on his jacket before photos - all I had to do was brush him off for a couple minutes and it would have been fine. The photos were in the dusty upstairs of a whiskey distillery. He kept telling me that it was clear that I had let him "roll around on the ground." Got the whole, "Learn to control your ****ing kids" lecture that all parents love. All he had actually done was lean against a wall at some point.

Mrs. Whitman and I were long passed out before the fisticuffs, but little Whitman got to witness it. They did have it coming to them a little bit - they took the limo out to gamble, mid-reception, and weren't back in time with it, leaving bride and groom stranded without their limo on their wedding might.

All are friends again, although the college roommate, who actually stood up in wedding No. 1, who didn't send back his RSVP card was unfriended on both Facebook and IRL.

 

[User 11148]

Only wedding brouhaha I ever actually observed involved a girl I'd been in school with since the 7th grade. The summer before we all went off to college, she hooked up with this loser of a guy a couple years older and they had themselves one of the all-time whirlwind romances, culminating in their wedding that December (no, she wasn't pregnant). This guy had been (and remains to this day) a first-ballot Full of **** HOFer, so the conditions were right for something legendary.

They were married in the church in which I was baptized. She was asked "Will ya?" first and confidently answered in the affirmative. When it was his turn, he paused, wobbled a little bit ... and then a little bit more ... and then eased out a barely audible "I will" as he collapsed. The groomsmen helped him to his feet as the minister tried to get things back on track, but then he collapsed again, this time falling into a candelabra that barely missed setting the place on fire. The minister then pronounced them man and wife ... the groom lying on the floor, the bride looking on in horror. Bride and groom made their exit with her walking alongside his stretcher on the way out to the ambulance.

To this day people believe he tried to fake his faint as a way of getting out of it -- would have been entirely in character -- but he got mixed up and accidentally said the words on the way down. They were separated by the next December and divorced a year later, and he's been married at least twice since.

 

[The Big Ragu]

Only wedding brouhaha I ever actually observed involved a girl I'd been in school with since the 7th grade. The summer before we all went off to college, she hooked up with this loser of a guy a couple years older and they had themselves one of the all-time whirlwind romances, culminating in their wedding that December (no, she wasn't pregnant). This guy had been (and remains to this day) a first-ballot Full of **** HOFer, so the conditions were right for something legendary.

They were married in the church in which I was baptized. She was asked "Will ya?" first and confidently answered in the affirmative. When it was his turn, he paused, wobbled a little bit ... and then a little bit more ... and then eased out a barely audible "I will" as he collapsed. The groomsmen helped him to his feet as the minister tried to get things back on track, but then he collapsed again, this time falling into a candelabra that barely missed setting the place on fire. The minister then pronounced them man and wife ... the groom lying on the floor, the bride looking on in horror. Bride and groom made their exit with her walking alongside his stretcher on the way out to the ambulance.

To this day people believe he tried to fake his faint as a way of getting out of it -- would have been entirely in character -- but he got mixed up and accidentally said the words on the way down. They were separated by the next December and divorced a year later, and he's been married at least twice since.

Brenda and Eddie had had it already, by the summer of '75. ...

 

[da man]

Pretty sure I've told this story here before, but I told my soon-to-be sister-in-law to eat a **** at one of my weddings.

Not yours, I hope.

 

[da man]

Only wedding brouhaha I ever actually observed involved a girl I'd been in school with since the 7th grade. The summer before we all went off to college, she hooked up with this loser of a guy a couple years older and they had themselves one of the all-time whirlwind romances, culminating in their wedding that December (no, she wasn't pregnant). This guy had been (and remains to this day) a first-ballot Full of **** HOFer, so the conditions were right for something legendary.

They were married in the church in which I was baptized. She was asked "Will ya?" first and confidently answered in the affirmative. When it was his turn, he paused, wobbled a little bit ... and then a little bit more ... and then eased out a barely audible "I will" as he collapsed. The groomsmen helped him to his feet as the minister tried to get things back on track, but then he collapsed again, this time falling into a candelabra that barely missed setting the place on fire. The minister then pronounced them man and wife ... the groom lying on the floor, the bride looking on in horror. Bride and groom made their exit with her walking alongside his stretcher on the way out to the ambulance.

To this day people believe he tried to fake his faint as a way of getting out of it -- would have been entirely in character -- but he got mixed up and accidentally said the words on the way down. They were separated by the next December and divorced a year later, and he's been married at least twice since.

That is an awesome story, and it really did make me LOL.

 

[JohnHammond]

Friend of my wife's had an embarrassing moment. She and her husband thought husband's dad would pay for the rehearsal luncheon. Dad said it wasn't his job to pay for it, so her uncle stepped up to pay the bill.

My father-in-law got stuck paying the tab for the rehearsal dinner for my wife's sister's second wedding. He didn't know he was on the hook for it. That marriage lasted about as long as dq's friend's.

 

[LongTimeListener]

Only wedding brouhaha I ever actually observed involved a girl I'd been in school with since the 7th grade. The summer before we all went off to college, she hooked up with this loser of a guy a couple years older and they had themselves one of the all-time whirlwind romances, culminating in their wedding that December (no, she wasn't pregnant). This guy had been (and remains to this day) a first-ballot Full of **** HOFer, so the conditions were right for something legendary.

They were married in the church in which I was baptized. She was asked "Will ya?" first and confidently answered in the affirmative. When it was his turn, he paused, wobbled a little bit ... and then a little bit more ... and then eased out a barely audible "I will" as he collapsed. The groomsmen helped him to his feet as the minister tried to get things back on track, but then he collapsed again, this time falling into a candelabra that barely missed setting the place on fire. The minister then pronounced them man and wife ... the groom lying on the floor, the bride looking on in horror. Bride and groom made their exit with her walking alongside his stretcher on the way out to the ambulance.

To this day people believe he tried to fake his faint as a way of getting out of it -- would have been entirely in character -- but he got mixed up and accidentally said the words on the way down. They were separated by the next December and divorced a year later, and he's been married at least twice since.

Between this and your sister, it's a great victory that you made it out of your hometown with your teeth and without children by at least three women. Kudos.

 

[User 11148]

Between this and your sister, it's a great victory that you made it out of your hometown with your teeth and without children by at least three women. Kudos.

LOL ... I tell you, you get to be my age and you start thinking about the little wiggles and wobbles of fate. My life could have gone so, so different with just the slightest nudge here or there.

 

[micropolitan guy]

Pretty sure I've told this story here before, but I told my soon-to-be sister-in-law to eat a **** at one of my weddings.

If it was your first wedding, and the **** she ate was yours, I can understand why you're talking about "one of my weddings." ;).

 

[Webster]

I was the best man at a wedding where the bride's younger brother got so drunk, he decided to go naked from the waist down on the dance floor. Brought a double meaning to the curse of the Irish.