Is It Wrong to Avoid Handing Out Halloween Candy??

[3_Octave_Fart]

I'm just not feeling it this year.
Fart's all about the kids, but we got about 10 trick-or-treaters last year.
Part of the resistance also is having a young nephew with a peanut allergy.
Wife suggested Play-Dough, stamps, pencils and other small toys.
But what kid wants that in their plastic pumpkin?
I sure as hell didn't.

 

[playthrough]

Wrong? Of course not. Just leave your porch light off.

And yeah, forget the knick-knacks for trick-or-treaters. The parents want to mooch the bag too and we don't want any stinkin' Play-Dough.

 

[Riptide]

I'm just not feeling it this year.
Fart's all about the kids, but we got about 10 trick-or-treaters last year.
Part of the resistance also is having a young nephew with a peanut allergy.
Wife suggested Play-Dough, stamps, pencils and other small toys.
But what kid wants that in their plastic pumpkin?
I sure as hell didn't.

The kids are still talking about the stuffed cabbage you gave out two years ago.

 

[RickStain]

According to my parents who watched a video about Halloween at their fundamentalist church when I was a kid, it's wrong to want to hand out Halloween candy.

 

[3_Octave_Fart]

Wrong? Of course not. Just leave your porch light off.

And yeah, forget the knick-knacks for trick-or-treaters. The parents want to mooch the bag too and we don't want any stinkin' Play-Dough.

You can eat Play-Doh too, dude.
FART did it many times as a boy.
It has a weird salinity to it.

 

[3_Octave_Fart]

I got blessed with great teeth.
I can't contribute to tooth decay, man.
The obesity epidemic is a whole other matter.
We need to give out carrots and celery, if anything.

 

[LongTimeListener]

Vegetarians give out celery sticks.

 

[BurnsWhenIPee]

I think the only acceptable non-candy toys are things cool enough to make them too expensive to buy a ton of - things like Silly Putty and stuff like that. But no, nothing wrong with not wanting to give out candy to a Halloween crowd that may not reach double-digits.

I'd keep the lights out and hit a movie with the wife.

 

[3_Octave_Fart]

I'm just not feeling it this year.
Fart's all about the kids, but we got about 10 trick-or-treaters last year.
Part of the resistance also is having a young nephew with a peanut allergy.
Wife suggested Play-Dough, stamps, pencils and other small toys.
But what kid wants that in their plastic pumpkin?
I sure as hell didn't.

The kids are still talking about the stuffed cabbage you gave out two years ago.

You should try my wife's eggplant.
She must want me to have tremendous gastrointestinal health.
Because I could have heated the entire house that night.

 

[spikechiquet]

I usually buy a 12 pack of ****ty canned beer (Miller Light, etc.) and sit out on the porch with candy the wife and I like and drink my good craft brews.
Any parent that comes by dressed up with their kid gets offered a can. Good on them, not good enough to be offered a good beer...but a beer nonetheless.

 

[Iron_chet]

First Halloween in a newly built neighborhood so not sure how many kids to expect as our street is only ~50% occupied.

On our old street I usually gave out candy while my wife took the kids. It is usually cold out so I always had a bottle of Baileys to have a shot with any parents that I knew.

Last year I had two 12 year old boys come to the door who were dressed as pimps. I asked them if they knew what pimp colors are, that being green for the money and gold for the honeys.

They were so impressed with this tidbit that I received high fives as well as thank-yous for the candy.

 

[Wenders]

I'm working Halloween night. Problem solved.

 

[SpeedTchr]

Vegetarians give out celery sticks.

****ers think they're better than everyone else... ;)

 

[waterytart]

Vegetarians give out celery sticks.

They could compromise by giving out Swedish Fish.

 

[Smasher_Sloan]

Distance between you and small children can only be a good thing.

 

[Bradley Guire]

I started to balk at handing out candy based on the price of the bags of assorted chocolate goodies. Then I found a bag of Dum Dums, 200 for $5. That should last me the night. I kept the bag of KitKats for myself.

 

[jr/shotglass]

Wow. I bet if the kids were going door-to-door looking for illicit drugs, y'all would really be pissed.

 

[joe]

Mickey's ponys with Reese's taped to them. That would rule.

 

[spikechiquet]

I'm just going to hand out Bibles and tracts that warn of the dangers of Satanic music....like One Direction...and twerking.

 

[JackReacher]

I'm finally going to start turning away ****ers who make no effort. Those teenagers who don't dress up, but walk around the neighborhood carrying a pillow case and expecting candy? THEY GET NOTHING!!!!