Fun with captions --- NASCAR edition

[dooley_womack1]

Tony Stewart rebuffs a recruiting effort by Michael Waltrip.

Monkey: Hey Tony, I've been thinking.
Tony: Oh yeah?
Monkey: Yeah, you should leave the fence climbing to us agile creatures.
Tony: Whatcha tryin to say?
Monkey [redneck voice]: That fat asses like you shouldn't be climbin' fences because you're gonna rip a hole in that them dere barbwire and then those Wal-Mart going-folks are gonna fondle ya like Jeff Gordon does ... Um ... just stick to burnouts jackass.

Mystery solved. We now know which sj member uses LSD

 

[Songbird]

Tony Stewart: "So, monkey, have you ever seen Faces of Death?"

 

[Trey Beamon]

Stewart initially rebuffed the female monkey's advances. A bloodtest, however, revealed him to be the monkey's biological brother. The pair is currently engaged with plans for a May 2007 wedding.

 

[John]

You don't like Gordon either, wow, that's three things we have in common. I'm so glad you answered my ad.

 

[Sam Mills 51]

Tony Stewart rebuffs a recruiting effort by Michael Waltrip.

Monkey: Hey Tony, I've been thinking.
Tony: Oh yeah?
Monkey: Yeah, you should leave the fence climbing to us agile creatures.
Tony: Whatcha tryin to say?
Monkey [redneck voice]: That fat asses like you shouldn't be climbin' fences because you're gonna rip a hole in that them dere barbwire and then those Wal-Mart going-folks are gonna fondle ya like Jeff Gordon does ... Um ... just stick to burnouts jackass.

See what too much time stuck on the roads in Pennsylvania can do? ;D [/inside joke]

 

[dooley_womack1]

Tony Stewart rebuffs a recruiting effort by Michael Waltrip.

Monkey: Hey Tony, I've been thinking.
Tony: Oh yeah?
Monkey: Yeah, you should leave the fence climbing to us agile creatures.
Tony: Whatcha tryin to say?
Monkey [redneck voice]: That fat asses like you shouldn't be climbin' fences because you're gonna rip a hole in that them dere barbwire and then those Wal-Mart going-folks are gonna fondle ya like Jeff Gordon does ... Um ... just stick to burnouts jackass.

See what too much time stuck with me on the roads in Pennsylvania can do? ;D [/inside joke]

 

[Sxysprtswrtr]

Tony Stewart: "So, monkey, have you ever seen Snakes on a Plane?"

 

[farmerjerome]

Tony Stewart and Nipples the monkey debate their recent IQ test results. After a lengthy debate, it was decided that there was no clear winner.

 

[PopeDirkBenedict]

Stewart: I wish I knew how to quit you.

 

[zeke12]

"So the downside is that she's a red-assed baboon, but the upside is that she'll let you go ass-to-mouth?"