Free Fappy!

[Moderator1]

Horrors. The anti-masturbation dolphin has been arrested. For masturbating. I wish I was this creative.

Best part of it was my daughter calling after someone explained to her why Fappy was a pretty funny name.

http://cbsnews.com.co/christian-anti-masturbations-mascot-arrested/

FREE FAPPY! I need to get t-shirts made.

 

[Riptide]

His life is over now. It has no porpoise.

 

[Vombatus]

I immediately thought of Pee Wee Herman. When he got arrested, you could buy "I'm Pulling for Pee Wee" T shirts.

 

[ifilus]

FAPPY THE MOVIE

 

[Vombatus]

Eyeing little fins with bad intent.... Oh, Aqua Lung.

 

[britwrit]

Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin, whose real name is 37-year-old Paul Horner, was arrested at Sea World after employees notified police about a man swimming in the dolphin tank with nothing on except a dolphin mascot head.

When you fall off the wagon, you might as well go whole hog.

[EDIT: Sadly, this appears to be a hoax. And our world is poorer for it.]

 

[SnarkShark]

Just so we're clear, everyone knows this isn't real, right? His name is ****ing Fappy.

And that's not the CBS web site.

 

[Moderator1]

Yes, I think everybody probably figured that out pretty quickly. I'll admit I saw the headline and thought, what!??!!? But it takes about two seconds of reading to realize it is satire.

 

[TheSportsPredictor]

Probably more true than the Steve Jobs movie.

 

[Batman]

If orcas have their dorsal fins go limp when they're sad, I guess it's safe to assume what Fappy looks like right now.

 

[swingline]

I really wanted this to be true.

 

[Armchair_QB]

How do you handcuff a dolphin?

 

[Baron Scicluna]

How do you handcuff a dolphin?

I figure this is close enough.