Awful ledes

[SnarkShark]

I posted this on the dog thread, and it inspired me to start this thread. Feel free to add some all-time bad ledes or new ones.

Barbra Streisand had her dog cloned — twice — and PETA isn't happy about it

I can't get over how dumb the idea of Barbra Streisand, cloning trailblazer is.

Barbra Streisand has been blazing trails in Hollywood for half a century, and she appears to be doing the same in the world of animal cloning.

 

[MNgremlin]

Anything holiday related.

 

[TexasVet]

"It's that time of year again."

No ****!!! Every time of the year is that time of year again.

 

[playthrough]

What a difference a year makes.

 

[MUTigers]

It was a tale of two halves.

 

[BYH 2: Electric Boogaloo]

Anything holiday related.

I totally did a turkey will taste better after a win lede at every Thanksgiving football game I ever covered. I regret nothing. The mistakes I made as a youngster molded me into the man I am today.

 

[stix]

Anything holiday related.

Weather related, too.

"It may have been a subzero January night, but inside the gym Johnny Jumpsot was red hot."

 

[stix]

With all this said, if you do this long enough, there are only so many ways you can write these things. Especially when you have 30 minutes to file.

We're all guilty of bad ledes, I'm sure.

 

[CD Boogie]

I posted this on the dog thread, and it inspired me to start this thread. Feel free to add some all-time bad ledes or new ones.

Barbra Streisand had her dog cloned — twice — and PETA isn't happy about it

I can't get over how dumb the idea of Barbra Streisand, cloning trailblazer is.

Barbra Streisand has been blazing trails in Hollywood for half a century, and she appears to be doing the same in the world of animal cloning.

Barbra Streisand has always been a nose ahead of others, so it should come as no surprise she’s nosed ahead in the world of animal cloning.

 

[busch]

Senior Day/Night ledes. Been guilty of this one (probably more than once): "On Senior Night, it was freshman Daffy McDingleduck stealing the spotlight." Pretty cliché.

 

[DanOregon]

Christmas came early...ugh.

It's that time of year again isn't really a journo staple, but when I hear it on ads or PSA it's like nails on a chalkboard. Does anyone really think people have been waiting with bated breath for the annual local charities event?

Fun fact: the term "bated breath?" Originated with Shakespeare in Merchant of Venice.

My favorite lede of my own was a storm damage follow up and I had "as workers tied the yellow safety ribbon around the old oak tree..."

 

[Slacker]

"It may have been a subzero January night, but inside the gym Johnny Jumpsot was red hot."

It won't last, though. He sounds like a drinker.

 

[Gator]

A quote.

The ****ING WORST.

YOU ARE THE WRITER. WRITE SOMETHING.

 

[wireguy]

I'll bet we all have made the mistake of "What a difference a year makes" for a lede. I haven't used it since a hockey recap at my old wire service gig back when I was 24. Just remember cliche ledes are a copout and a lack of original thought according to one style book I read once.

 

[nietsroob17]

Duuuhnuh.

Duuuhnuh.

Dundundundundundundundunduuuuuunnnn.

No, we’re not talking about sharks, but there’s another sea creature that spring breakers on Padre Island might have to worry about.

 

[CD Boogie]

This lede has it all: weather talk, typos, repeated phrases, unintentional humor: The Harvey Weinstein Joke That Killed at the Independent Spirit Awards

It was a wet and cold affair at the Independent Spirit Awards on Saturday, where a rainstorm caused the show’s constructed floor—as always, the event was held in Santa Monica, under a giant tent a few feet away from the beach—a rainstorm caused the show’s constructed floor to be drenched with water. Allison Janney mentioned that the train of her dress was soaked, and Timothée Chalamet slipped while talking to the podium. But the weather did not dampen the fun and celebratory mood at the afternoon ceremony, which annually honors indie movies on the eve of the Academy Awards.

 

[Slacker]

This lede has it all: weather talk, typos, repeated phrases, unintentional humor: The Harvey Weinstein Joke That Killed at the Independent Spirit Awards

It was a wet and cold affair at the Independent Spirit Awards on Saturday, where a rainstorm caused the show’s constructed floor—as always, the event was held in Santa Monica, under a giant tent a few feet away from the beach—a rainstorm caused the show’s constructed floor to be drenched with water. Allison Janney mentioned that the train of her dress was soaked, and Timothée Chalamet slipped while talking to the podium. But the weather did not dampen the fun and celebratory mood at the afternoon ceremony, which annually honors indie movies on the eve of the Academy Awards.

"It was a dark and stormy day. ... "

 

[Slacker]

Crossthreading here ...

Thousands share that sentiment:

https://www.avclub.com/despite-all-their-rage-smashing-pumpkins-tour-isnt-sel-1823324738

Emptiness is loneliness, and loneliness is cleanliness, and cleanliness is godliness, and God is empty, just like thousands of seats for the upcoming Smashing Pumpkins reunion tour. The band has been getting a lot of press lately, thanks to a much-ballyhooed reunion of original members Billy Corgan, James Iha, and Jimmy Chamberlain—and also thanks to a very public feud between Corgan and ex-bassist D’arcy Wretsky, who will not be joining the “Shiny And Oh So Bright” tour featuring all those loud and brooding hits from the angsty heyday of Gish through Machina/The Machines Of God. It’s the kind of thing that makes an old fan of the band excited to pull their moth-eaten “Zero” shirt out of the closet and enjoy an evening out, singing along to songs about how awful the world is and how nobody understands you.

 

[SoloFlyer]

Crossthreading here ...


Emptiness is loneliness, and loneliness is cleanliness, and cleanliness is godliness, and God is empty, just like thousands of seats for the upcoming Smashing Pumpkins reunion tour. The band has been getting a lot of press lately, thanks to a much-ballyhooed reunion of original members Billy Corgan, James Iha, and Jimmy Chamberlain—and also thanks to a very public feud between Corgan and ex-bassist D’arcy Wretsky, who will not be joining the “Shiny And Oh So Bright” tour featuring all those loud and brooding hits from the angsty heyday of Gish through Machina/The Machines Of God. It’s the kind of thing that makes an old fan of the band excited to pull their moth-eaten “Zero” shirt out of the closet and enjoy an evening out, singing along to songs about how awful the world is and how nobody understands you.

This is a phenomenal lede.

 

[typefitter]

This lede has it all: weather talk, typos, repeated phrases, unintentional humor: The Harvey Weinstein Joke That Killed at the Independent Spirit Awards

It was a wet and cold affair at the Independent Spirit Awards on Saturday, where a rainstorm caused the show’s constructed floor—as always, the event was held in Santa Monica, under a giant tent a few feet away from the beach—a rainstorm caused the show’s constructed floor to be drenched with water. Allison Janney mentioned that the train of her dress was soaked, and Timothée Chalamet slipped while talking to the podium. But the weather did not dampen the fun and celebratory mood at the afternoon ceremony, which annually honors indie movies on the eve of the Academy Awards.

That story has some form of literary crime in nearly every paragraph. Holy ****, is that some shameful slop.