Your move, North Korea

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http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20100815/wl_asia_afp/skoreankoreausmilitarydrill

Lotta bluster coming from the home of the world's greatest golfer. Almost enough to make me wonder if he's serious.
 
My brother just began a two-year deployment in South Korea. He said we'd soon be reading about his first "exercise." Later added that it's a practice invasion of North Korea.
But the worst part from his first e-mail was about the first apartment complex the real estate agent showed him (no vacancy in army housing for at least a few months). There was loud barking coming from the field next door; a neighbor secretly pulled him aside and said it was a dog slaughter house, and the haunting noises and smells had forced her to seek counseling until she could get out of the lease.
So instead, he took an apartment where if you run the AC (and it's impossible not to at this time of the year), the electric bill averages $1000 A MONTH.
 
"The military counteraction of (North Korea) will be the severest punishment no one has ever met in the world," he said.

So he's a crackpot and his grammar sucks. Well, his translator's grammar sucks, anyway.
 
gingerbread said:
My brother just began a two-year deployment in South Korea. He said we'd soon be reading about his first "exercise." Later added that it's a practice invasion of North Korea.
But the worst part from his first e-mail was about the first apartment complex the real estate agent showed him (no vacancy in army housing for at least a few months). There was loud barking coming from the field next door; a neighbor secretly pulled him aside and said it was a dog slaughter house, and the haunting noises and smells had forced her to seek counseling until she could get out of the lease.
So instead, he took an apartment where if you run the AC (and it's impossible not to at this time of the year), the electric bill averages $1000 A MONTH.
And I thought my bill was high.
 
The ad on this page says "Stop your dog from barking anytime, anywhere!" It's promoting something called Bark Off, but I think the first idea is more effective.
 
Reading the Norks' official "news" website always puts a smile on my face. Hilarious stuff. Like Kim Jong Ill shooting a 50 on 18 holes.
http://www.kcna.co.jp/index-e.htm
Punishment? They can't even feed their own people. They have a bazillion tanks and a bazillion artillery pieces, all dating from the 1950s. The South Koreans have an excellent military and would chop them to ribbons. The shame is Seoul would be blasted to shreds by artillery fire and the damage to South Korea's economy wouldn't be worth a war, even if it did free the North. It'd be a Pyhrric victory.

Love this from their New Year's editorial:
Kim Jong Il is leading the campaign for the building of a great, prosperous and powerful nation to a brilliant victory as he steers the efforts to effect a great revolutionary upsurge on the strength of single-minded unity.
 
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Bamadog said:
Reading the Norks' official "news" website always puts a smile on my face. Hilarious stuff. Like Kim Jong Ill shooting a 50 on 18 holes.
http://www.kcna.co.jp/index-e.htm
Punishment? They can't even feed their own people. They have a bazillion tanks and a bazillion artillery pieces, all dating from the 1950s. The South Koreans have an excellent military and would chop them to ribbons. The shame is Seoul would be blasted to shreds by artillery fire and the damage to South Korea's economy wouldn't be worth a war, even if it did free the North. It'd be a Pyhrric victory.

Love this from their New Year's editorial:
Kim Jong Il is leading the campaign for the building of a great, prosperous and powerful nation to a brilliant victory as he steers the efforts to effect a great revolutionary upsurge on the strength of single-minded unity.

Don't they still have at least one nuclear weapon? Those things are remarkable equation levelers, particularly if one is pointed at, say, Seoul.

Change a couple words in that statement and it could be in the front of any SEC media guide, too.
 
deskslave said:
Bamadog said:
Reading the Norks' official "news" website always puts a smile on my face. Hilarious stuff. Like Kim Jong Ill shooting a 50 on 18 holes.
http://www.kcna.co.jp/index-e.htm
Punishment? They can't even feed their own people. They have a bazillion tanks and a bazillion artillery pieces, all dating from the 1950s. The South Koreans have an excellent military and would chop them to ribbons. The shame is Seoul would be blasted to shreds by artillery fire and the damage to South Korea's economy wouldn't be worth a war, even if it did free the North. It'd be a Pyhrric victory.

Love this from their New Year's editorial:
Kim Jong Il is leading the campaign for the building of a great, prosperous and powerful nation to a brilliant victory as he steers the efforts to effect a great revolutionary upsurge on the strength of single-minded unity.

Don't they still have at least one nuclear weapon? Those things are remarkable equation levelers, particularly if one is pointed at, say, Seoul.

Change a couple words in that statement and it could be in the front of any SEC media guide, too.
deskslave said:
Bamadog said:
Reading the Norks' official "news" website always puts a smile on my face. Hilarious stuff. Like Kim Jong Ill shooting a 50 on 18 holes.
http://www.kcna.co.jp/index-e.htm
Punishment? They can't even feed their own people. They have a bazillion tanks and a bazillion artillery pieces, all dating from the 1950s. The South Koreans have an excellent military and would chop them to ribbons. The shame is Seoul would be blasted to shreds by artillery fire and the damage to South Korea's economy wouldn't be worth a war, even if it did free the North. It'd be a Pyhrric victory.

Love this from their New Year's editorial:
Houston Nutt Kim Jong Il is leading the campaign for the building of a great, prosperous and powerful Rebel nation to a brilliant SEC championship game victory as he steers the efforts to effect a great revolutionary upsurge on the strength of single-minded unity.
Fixed
 
Bamadog said:
deskslave said:
Bamadog said:
Reading the Norks' official "news" website always puts a smile on my face. Hilarious stuff. Like Kim Jong Ill shooting a 50 on 18 holes.
http://www.kcna.co.jp/index-e.htm
Punishment? They can't even feed their own people. They have a bazillion tanks and a bazillion artillery pieces, all dating from the 1950s. The South Koreans have an excellent military and would chop them to ribbons. The shame is Seoul would be blasted to shreds by artillery fire and the damage to South Korea's economy wouldn't be worth a war, even if it did free the North. It'd be a Pyhrric victory.

Love this from their New Year's editorial:
Kim Jong Il is leading the campaign for the building of a great, prosperous and powerful nation to a brilliant victory as he steers the efforts to effect a great revolutionary upsurge on the strength of single-minded unity.

Don't they still have at least one nuclear weapon? Those things are remarkable equation levelers, particularly if one is pointed at, say, Seoul.

Change a couple words in that statement and it could be in the front of any SEC media guide, too.
deskslave said:
Bamadog said:
Reading the Norks' official "news" website always puts a smile on my face. Hilarious stuff. Like Kim Jong Ill shooting a 50 on 18 holes.
http://www.kcna.co.jp/index-e.htm
Punishment? They can't even feed their own people. They have a bazillion tanks and a bazillion artillery pieces, all dating from the 1950s. The South Koreans have an excellent military and would chop them to ribbons. The shame is Seoul would be blasted to shreds by artillery fire and the damage to South Korea's economy wouldn't be worth a war, even if it did free the North. It'd be a Pyhrric victory.

Love this from their New Year's editorial:
Houston Nutt Kim Jong Il is leading the campaign for the building of a great, prosperous and powerful Rebel nation to a brilliant SEC championship game victory as he steers the efforts to effect a great revolutionary upsurge on the strength of single-minded unity.
Fixed
That's not happening this year.
 
deskslave said:
Bamadog said:
Reading the Norks' official "news" website always puts a smile on my face. Hilarious stuff. Like Kim Jong Ill shooting a 50 on 18 holes.
http://www.kcna.co.jp/index-e.htm
Punishment? They can't even feed their own people. They have a bazillion tanks and a bazillion artillery pieces, all dating from the 1950s. The South Koreans have an excellent military and would chop them to ribbons. The shame is Seoul would be blasted to shreds by artillery fire and the damage to South Korea's economy wouldn't be worth a war, even if it did free the North. It'd be a Pyhrric victory.

Love this from their New Year's editorial:
Kim Jong Il is leading the campaign for the building of a great, prosperous and powerful nation to a brilliant victory as he steers the efforts to effect a great revolutionary upsurge on the strength of single-minded unity.

Don't they still have at least one nuclear weapon? Those things are remarkable equation levelers, particularly if one is pointed at, say, Seoul.

Change a couple words in that statement and it could be in the front of any SEC media guide, too.

Odd thing. There's a link on the North Koreans' web site that takes you to Alabama's football site. Apparently Kim Jong Il has been taking lessons from Nick Saban on how to intimidate and control media access.
 
deskslave said:
Don't they still have at least one nuclear weapon? Those things are remarkable equation levelers, particularly if one is pointed at, say, Seoul.

It might not be pointed at anything at all. Those missle tests might be all bluster to get us to think they're capable of using a nuke via a guided missle. Thing is they probably wouldn't have to use a missle as a delivery mechanism.

There probably is a few tunnels under the DMZ which go pretty far south. Depending on the level of sophistication, the North Korean army could basically walk that thing pretty close and lob it.

But in all seriousness, why the hell would they waste a perfectly good nuke on Seoul when they could unleash conventional weapons hell on it? If that doesn't suit Kim's fancy, he could knock out a few damns holding back ****loads of water and flood the northern part of South Korea.

If he uses a missle nuke, I'd venture Japan as a prime candidate. Lob a bunch of garbage missles at them and hide the nuke in the middle of all that outdated trash just in case one of our weapon systems knocks out a few. Blamo! There goes Tokyo.

As for us, North Korea has some of the best (if not the outright best) secret agents in the world. While we're all busy worrying about a missle hitting say Seattle or San Francisco, they could very easily activate some agent to deliver a suitcase nuke into one of our big metropolises.
 
The great nation can now proclaim its greatness in 140 great characters or less.

http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5iUzKnAUAwhrvRC-6jT2ENhoaecHAD9HL6L580
 
Bamadog said:
Reading the Norks' official "news" website always puts a smile on my face. Hilarious stuff. Like Kim Jong Ill shooting a 50 on 18 holes.


Love this from their New Year's editorial:
Kim Jong Il Glenn Beck is leading the campaign for the building of a great, prosperous and powerful nation to a brilliant victory as he steers the efforts to effect a great revolutionary upsurge on the strength of single-minded unity.
 
They're on Twitter! And Youtube!

http://twitter.com/uriminzok

http://www.youtube.com/user/uriminzokkiri (They leave commenting open too!)
 

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