Looking for prep football tab feedback

[Brad Guire]

This is the first time I've posted here. I'm looking for some constructive feedback on my stories and my section's prep football tab in general. I'm a second-year sports writer, and before that I was just the designer.

http://www.magicvalley.com/temp/downloads/sportstab/

I have no way to copy and paste the text of my stories, but here is the PDF of the section to download from the Web site.

Thanks in advance.

 

[dawgpounddiehard]

Brad:

I downloaded it and I had just enough time to glance through it, at first glance it looks really well done. I'm sorry I can't offer any praise or ways to improve. If I have time to jump back through it I'll let you know.

 

[wickedwritah]

This is the first time I've posted here. I'm looking for some constructive feedback on my stories and my section's prep football tab in general. I'm a second-year sports writer, and before that I was just the designer.

http://www.magicvalley.com/temp/downloads/sportstab/

I have no way to copy and paste the text of my stories, but here is the PDF of the section to download from the Web site.

Thanks in advance.

Did you participate in the football tab exchange? If you didn't, PM Jim Carty and get on board for next year.

 

[jgmacg]

Brad -

Thanks so much for posting this with us. Really good work. A great looking section, and, as wicked suggests, one you should be proud to share in the tab exchange.

There are too many stories in there to nitpick individually, but there was thing I noticed in skimming the ledes. Be careful of setting up rhetorical opposites (i.e., "You thought this. But this is what's true."), if only because 1) it presumes you can discern the reader's thoughts, 2) it's usually a device, rather than an honest observation, and 3) it requires a certain amount of temporizing language ("but," however," though") that bloats and slows the sentences.

Again, a really terrific section, for which I hope you won much praise. Please feel free to bring your work back here any time for more detailed assessment.

 

[Brad Guire]

I know how busy everyone is, so I greatly appreciate the feedback. Thanks!

My approach to the beat (more emphasis on people rather than numbers) seems appreciated, gauged by the response here and at work. My most recent feature was picked up by the ME for a Sunday A1 package, so I must be doing something right.

Thanks again.