Least favorite holiday song?

[Ace]

I like Christmas music but there are some songs (and versions of songs) that I just despise.

I hate "Winter Wonderland" rhyming "conspire" with "fire" just seems forced and wrong.

When we had to sing in it elementary school, I would always sing "later on, we'll perspire, as we sit, by the fire."

Anyway, it seems like a song designed not to offend anyone. Blecch.

Any others?

 

[Captain_Kirk]

When I hear this one, I am Simply (Not) Having A Wonderful Christmas Time.

Sorry, Paul. Love your body of work, but that's a major league stinker.

 

[Ace]

When I hear this one, I am Simply (Not) Having A Wonderful Christmas Time.

Sorry, Paul. Love your body of work, but that's a major league stinker.

Ding, dong, ding, dong
Ding, dong, ding, dong

 

[2muchcoffeeman]

The double-barrelled shotgun of holiday musical fail:

"Santa Baby" and "Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer"

 

[writing irish]

The library of Christmas suck is immense. "Little Saint Nick" by the Beach Boys is enough to make me want to destroy all of California in a rampage of vengeance. Out of the traditional English carols, I'd say that "Deck the Halls" sucks the eggnog out of Scrooge's withered phallus.

 

[Bob Slydell]

Grandma got run over by a reindeer makes me want to kill an elf!!!

 

[HC]

Pop singers mangling Schubert's setting of "Ave Maria".

a. NOT a Christmas song

b. If you're going to sing in Latin, learn what it means and don't breathe in the middle of a ****in' word.

c. It's a beautiful song but it's not meant to be lugubrious and slow. Wallowing is unbecoming in a singer.

 

[Bad Guy Zero]

Anything by Johnny Mathis.

 

[alleyallen]

Santa Baby and We Wish You A Merry Christmas...HATE THEM!

I love Have a Holly Jolly Christmas, especially sung by Berl Ives.

 

[Bubbler]

Some of the least fave have already been mentioned, most notably Simply Having A Wonderful Christmas Time, which is almost hideous enough to go into a time machine and feed Lennon-McCartney songs like Winchester Cathedral or Incense And Peppermints, so the Beatles' popularity would never reach the heights they reached, thus preventing McCartney from having a solo career and keeping us from ever hearing that insipid song.

We have this thread every year, but I'll throw in for All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth. All I want for Christmas is to punch that little ****er in the mouth, teeth or sans teeth.

 

[Cansportschick]

Jingle Cats version of White Christmas.

The most painful thing I have ever had to let my eardrums endure.

Captain Kirk and Bubbler one thing I have to say about your dissing of McCartney's Xmas hit: >:( >:( >:(

 

[Captain_Kirk]

Some of the least fave have already been mentioned, most notably Simply Having A Wonderful Christmas Time, which is almost hideous enough to go into a time machine and feed Lennon-McCartney songs like Winchester Cathedral or Incense And Peppermints, so the Beatles' popularity would never reach the heights they reached, thus preventing McCartney from having a solo career and keeping us from ever hearing that insipid song.

We have this thread every year, but I'll throw in for All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth. All I want for Christmas is to punch that little ****er in the mouth, teeth or sans teeth.

Well, if you punch him in the mouth, he's gonna be needing more than two teeth, I surmise.

 

[Stretch15]

Happy Christmas by John Lennon.

Absolutely awful.

 

[Mystery_Meat]

Seconded on We Wish You a Merry Christmas. Buy your own ****ing figgy pudding and stfu about it already, you mooch.

 

[HejiraHenry]

Well, all of them by the evening of Dec. 24.

 

[Ace]

Well, all of them by the evening of Dec. 24.

I could listen to the Charlie Brown Christmas songs every day, though.

 

[Jim Tom Pinch]

Last Christmas I gave you my heart etc. etc. etc.

 

[Ace]

Last Christmas I gave you my heart etc. etc. etc.

Winner, winner. Chicken dinner!

 

[Gold]

The double-barrelled shotgun of holiday musical fail:

"Santa Baby" and "Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer"

No and Yes.

No to Santa Baby as sung by Eartha Kitt, which is a sexy song for the pre-Rock and Roll era. But if you are referring to the Madonna version, that is a bad Christmas song.

The Jingle Bells by the Barking Dogs is also retching.

If I were named dictator of the US, my first act (and if I could be successful in this, I would force a change in the Constitution to have direct presidential elections and resign immediately thereafter) would be to ban playing Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer. I would also assign National Guard units to round up every copy of that song and destroy it. Oh, I believe in civil liberties but I think you would have to admit this would be a good use of dictatorial power, and I would not ask any monetary compensation in return. I would be content in the knowledge that grateful citizens would be appreciative and give me some caffine-free herbal tea with Equal or honey.

 

[bostonbred]

"Christmas Shoes"

Post a lamer holiday song. I dare you. Doesn't exist.