Am I facing unfair treatment?

[WestCoastWriter]

Hi. First time poster, longtime lurker.

I come here because I am at my wit's end. About a year and a half ago, I took a job at a somewhat large circulation paper. This was supposed to be my "big break", especially since the SE has the reputation for being an outstanding developer of talent. The paper itself has been known to send people to much bigger, much more major publications.

Over the past year, despite repeated reassurances that I would not be "pigeonholed", I have been repeatedly passed over by other writers whenever a beat comes open, or when one of our "bigger" writers (i.e. our pro sports guys) needs a backup for an event. The last such instance provoked such surprise on the staff that the guy who got this beat over me actually took me aside and said "I'm not going to apologize for getting this, but you got screwed."

Now here's the thing: My SE is a fanatical golfer. Every member of our staff plays golf. I do not. When our SE is making small talk with people, he's talking about golf. He regularly goes golfing with our other writers. While he's in the office, he is usually too busy and harried to be bothered, but I hear he relaxes much more out on the course.

I do not think I have been passed over simply because I'm the only non-golfer. This guy is a award-winning and respected professional. He knows his stuff, inside and out, and he wouldn't be stupid enough to hand work over to an incapable writer JUST because they golf together. But some of my close friends in the organization whom I feel comfortable enough to discuss such things with do say that, if all else is equal or close to equal, my non golf-playing may play a role, consciously or unconsciously.

I have worked for more SE's than I care to count in my career. Some of them believed in seperating themselves from the staff. Some believed in taking the time to get to know each and every staff member individually. Never have I had one who will be openly social with certain staff members, but not others.


I can't go over his head on this and take my concerns elsewhere, either. My SE's boss is a very big fan of his, and does not question his decisions in the slightest. Plus, I am not a wave-maker. I pride myself on being a good worker with a good attitude, and I'm not about to risk that reputation. I don't feel as if I can talk to my SE personally about this, as he has a very authoritative, tempermental air about him. He does not like to be questioned or be told something he's doing is wrong.

I am very worried about my future. I will look for jobs elsewhere, but they would likely be lateral moves. I came here to learn how to take that "next step", and was more or less told I would get a taste of that experience. As it is now, no one would likely take me on to do anything above what I am doing now, something I frankly don't want to spend the rest of my career doing.

I believe I've made it as far as I have in this business based primarily on sheer want-to. I don't consider myself talented, and I certainly don't have a pedigree of internships and/or a good j-school. I've just done whatever it takes. But I WILL NOT spend money on equipment and lessons for a sport I personally loathe just so I can exist in the eyes of my boss.

I do want to add that I respect my SE enormously. He's by far the smartest guy I've ever had to answer to. Working for him has been the best opportunity of my career, which is why this upsets me.

I guess all writers, eventually, have to confront the fact that they'll eventually hit the celing. I just never thought it could happen like this.

 

[Moderator1]

Have you talked to the guy about this? If he's really a good manager, he ought to be able to explain to his people why this is or isn't done.

 

[WestCoastWriter]

Have you talked to the guy about this?  If he's really a good manager, he ought to be able to explain to his people why this is or isn't done.

No, and I'm not sure I'd feel comfortable doing so. He's a hell of an editor, but he can be pretty rough around the edges. If he's busy, or doesn't want to hear what you have to say, he's not above telling you to screw off. And I doubt any boss wants to hear an implication that he's playing favorites.

I've considered just saying "I don't feel I get a chance to know you and communicate with you like the other guys," but even that may be pushing things. I can't make this worse.

 

[dixiehack]

Are you sure it isn't East Coast bias? :P

Seriously, ask if you can grab lunch or go somewhere else that is non-threatening, then ask him what specific steps he feels you should take in order to improve.

 

[DENNY]

dixiehack's idea is a good one.

Ask what you can improve on and make sure the SE knows you want to move up to a better beat.

If your SE has helped you improve, that should help your chances of possibly landing a better job somewhere else.

 

[Dyno]

Completely agree with dixiehack and loki. You say you're not a wavemaker, so being proactive like this might feel uncomfortable, but the guy's not a mindreader - you have to let him know what you're thinking/feeling. Unfortunately, just doing a good job isn't enough -- you have to let people know what you want.

 

[WestCoastWriter]

Completely agree with dixiehack and loki.  You say you're not a wavemaker, so being proactive like this might feel uncomfortable, but the guy's not a mindreader - you have to let him know what you're thinking/feeling.  Unfortunately, just doing a good job isn't enough -- you have to let people know what you want. 

I understand that. I do. But also, I have to look at it from his eyes: Would YOU like one of your employees imply to you that you play favorites because of golf?

I know I need to talk to him. My whole career could be at stake. But I have to tread very carefully.

Also, I feel I need to point this out: I am open to the fact that maybe, just maybe, I'm getting passed over because I'm not good enough. In no way am I solely blaming this for my lack of advancement. But I need to at least know where I stand.

 

[Ace]

Have you considered learning to play golf? In a lot of businesses, this would be a no-brainer for a young buck with aspirations.

 

[dixiehack]

Who says you imply that? Not you, not as long as you can produce an EKG pattern. You aren't trying to call him out over the last decision, your trying to find out what you need to do to catch the next train coming along.

 

[clancy brother]

**** learning to play golf just for sycophancy's sake.  This is yet more proof that golf is the spawn of Satan.  **** the old-boy, Scotch-swilling, man-breasts-in-golf-shirts, elitist culture.  No one earning a sports reporter's pay should have to put up with that ****.  That's for bankers and financial-firm assholes.

Best thing to do with this douchenozzle is to let him know that you're hungry for better things and ask him for a frank assessment of what you need to do.  Don't bring up golf and don't imply that he's running the department unfairly.  I wish you the best of luck.  You may want to check out the jobs board, though.  I bet that some SE out there would be happy to have your talents on hand and wouldn't give a **** that you aren't interested in particpating in some anachronistic, bourgeois ritual posing as a sport.

 

[imjustagirl2]

**** learning to play golf just for sycophancy's sake. This is yet more proof that golf is the spawn of Satan. **** the old-boy, Scotch-swilling, man-breasts-in-golf-shirts, elitist culture. No one earning a sports reporter's pay should have to put up with that ****. That's for bankers and financial-firm assholes.

Best thing to do with this douchenozzle is to let him know that you're hungry for better things and ask him for a frank assessment of what you need to do. Don't bring up golf and don't imply that he's running the department unfairly. I wish you the best of luck. You may want to check out the jobs board, though. I bet that some SE out there would be happy to have your talents on hand and wouldn't give a **** that you aren't interested in particpating in some anachronistic, bourgeois ritual posing as a sport.

So I'm guessing Augusta wouldn't let you in? :D

On a serious note, I agree with most of what's been posted here. Meet with your boss, OUTSIDE of the office, and talk about you. Your future, your aspirations. Ask how you can get better. Tell him where you want to end up (beat-wise) and what you want to do. Show him what you've done in your time there, and make your case. Do NOT talk about the job you missed out on, unless it's in a tangential way ("What kind of skills might I have needed to have had a chance at that job?"), just focus on you and what YOU can do to get to where you want to be.

Good luck.

 

[Moderator1]

Completely agree with dixiehack and loki.  You say you're not a wavemaker, so being proactive like this might feel uncomfortable, but the guy's not a mindreader - you have to let him know what you're thinking/feeling.  Unfortunately, just doing a good job isn't enough -- you have to let people know what you want. 

I understand that. I do. But also, I have to look at it from his eyes: Would YOU like one of your employees imply to you that you play favorites because of golf?

I know I need to talk to him. My whole career could be at stake. But I have to tread very carefully.

Also, I feel I need to point this out: I am open to the fact that maybe, just maybe, I'm getting passed over because I'm not good enough. In no way am I solely blaming this for my lack of advancement. But I need to at least know where I stand.

Do NOT imply that. Just ask what's up, what you need to do, etc. Tell him you thought you had a good shot at such and such a beat and it didn't happen and you want to make sure you're ready next time.
If the guy is half the manager you say he is, he'll talk to you. That's the major part of managing, communicating with your staff. If he can't do that well, he's not a good manager.

 

[Satchel Pooch]

**** learning to play golf just for sycophancy's sake.  This is yet more proof that golf is the spawn of Satan.  **** the old-boy, Scotch-swilling, man-breasts-in-golf-shirts, elitist culture.  No one earning a sports reporter's pay should have to put up with that ****.  That's for bankers and financial-firm assholes.

Best thing to do with this douchenozzle is to let him know that you're hungry for better things and ask him for a frank assessment of what you need to do.  Don't bring up golf and don't imply that he's running the department unfairly.  I wish you the best of luck.  You may want to check out the jobs board, though.  I bet that some SE out there would be happy to have your talents on hand and wouldn't give a **** that you aren't interested in particpating in some anachronistic, bourgeois ritual posing as a sport.

" "



I know this isn't a slam-golf thread, but damn that felt good ... and I didn't even write it.

 

[WestCoastWriter]

**** learning to play golf just for sycophancy's sake.  This is yet more proof that golf is the spawn of Satan.  **** the old-boy, Scotch-swilling, man-breasts-in-golf-shirts, elitist culture.  No one earning a sports reporter's pay should have to put up with that ****.  That's for bankers and financial-firm assholes.

Best thing to do with this douchenozzle is to let him know that you're hungry for better things and ask him for a frank assessment of what you need to do.  Don't bring up golf and don't imply that he's running the department unfairly.  I wish you the best of luck.  You may want to check out the jobs board, though.  I bet that some SE out there would be happy to have your talents on hand and wouldn't give a **** that you aren't interested in particpating in some anachronistic, bourgeois ritual posing as a sport.

Thanks, at least, for bringing a smile to my face with that.

But here's the thing...I don't WANT to hate this guy. I wan't to take advantage of his knowledge in every possible way.

One thing: I've been doing this for a while now. And over the years, I've come to understand that I'm never going to be buddy-buddy with most of my coworkers/superiors. I don't really follow sports much outside of the office or my beat. I politely decline the fantasy baseball team or the company softball team. I have my own life and interests and hobbies, and I believe in the pursuit of a balanced lifestyle.

I understand the trade-off is that, though I get along with everyone, I won't necessarily be invited to the bar across the street. And that's fine. I'm not asking my SE to be buddies with me like he is with his golf buddies. I just want a productive employee-boss relationship for as long as I'm here.

 

[Ace]

**** learning to play golf just for sycophancy's sake. This is yet more proof that golf is the spawn of Satan. **** the old-boy, Scotch-swilling, man-breasts-in-golf-shirts, elitist culture. No one earning a sports reporter's pay should have to put up with that ****. That's for bankers and financial-firm assholes.

Best thing to do with this douchenozzle is to let him know that you're hungry for better things and ask him for a frank assessment of what you need to do. Don't bring up golf and don't imply that he's running the department unfairly. I wish you the best of luck. You may want to check out the jobs board, though. I bet that some SE out there would be happy to have your talents on hand and wouldn't give a **** that you aren't interested in particpating in some anachronistic, bourgeois ritual posing as a sport.

Sounds like somebody has the yips.

Hey, westcoast is the one who noticed the trend. I say, you may want to do something about it.

 

[Bubbler]

Completely agree with dixiehack and loki.  You say you're not a wavemaker, so being proactive like this might feel uncomfortable, but the guy's not a mindreader - you have to let him know what you're thinking/feeling.  Unfortunately, just doing a good job isn't enough -- you have to let people know what you want. 

I understand that. I do. But also, I have to look at it from his eyes: Would YOU like one of your employees imply to you that you play favorites because of golf?

I know I need to talk to him. My whole career could be at stake. But I have to tread very carefully.

Also, I feel I need to point this out: I am open to the fact that maybe, just maybe, I'm getting passed over because I'm not good enough. In no way am I solely blaming this for my lack of advancement. But I need to at least know where I stand.

Do NOT imply that.  Just ask what's up, what you need to do, etc.  Tell him you thought you had a good shot at such and such a beat and it didn't happen and you want to make sure you're ready next time.
If the guy is half the manager you say he is, he'll talk to you.  That's the major part of managing, communicating with your staff.  If he can't do that well, he's not a good manager.

I'll second all of that and add one more nugget you need to consider -- what if your theory about his golf buddies getting those jobs is wrong?

If you tell him your theory and its off-base, well, you just ****ed yourself in the eyes of your manager. Because how is he supposed to trust your judgment with a beat or anything else when -- instead of framing your question about the beat from the standpoint of what you needed to do to improve/change/etc. and get it -- you pulled the conspiracy theory card first?

I know I'd appreciate it none too much. Because the thing about conspiracy theories is that they're often wrong, and this comes from someone who has believed in conspiracy theories that were off-base and been the subject of ones that were WAY off-base.

Just keep it professional. Maybe this guy has something else in mind for you.

 

[clancy brother]

WCW, no one's asking you to hate the guy.  Heck, it'd be best if you liked him, even though he sounds like a d-nozzle.  You don't even need to hate golf, although obviously some of us enjoy mocking it as much as others do playing it...  ;)

I agree with your philosophy of pursuing balance in your lifestyle.  Getting away from sports when you're not at work, not focusing your social energies on co-workers, etc...I'm with you on that one.  But we live in a culture that rewards mono-mania.  The ideal of the Renaissance man was abandoned long ago.  Yeah, a person with their **** together doesn't always go drinking with the guys after work.  Hopefully, there's a significant other/child/parent/healthy activity/intellectual activity/creative activity that's more deserving of your time than drinking Pissweiser on tap and rehashing irrelevant office gossip and sports bull****.  But you will pay the price.  Every workplace has its professional culture.  If you fit in, you get the intangible benefits.  If you don't, you don't.  No place will be perfect, but if your present shop is wasting your abilities because it's more of a buddy-ocracy than a meritocracy, again, it might be time to look around.

Finally, Bubbler's contribution was pretty insightful. Maybe golf has nothing to do with anything. Perhaps your lack of congruence with the social scene and your lack of advancement aren't related. Get the SE's input, process that with what you've observed, and see what you end up thinking.

 

[playthrough]

Damn, I would have killed for my major-metro (and warm-weather) sports dept. to have anyone as fanatical about golf as I was...

Still, I wouldn't read much into your SE and his golf jones. Even if he's playing with guys who you think are jumping over you for jobs, don't worry about it. The amount of shop talk on the golf course is less than you think. As I tell my wife, me and my buddies on the course don't talk about women, work or even much other sports. We just talk about our lousy golf games.

 

[Gold]

Read what you posted a couple times. You may see a couple things if you read it and let it kind of swirl around in your brain.

I would talk to your sports editor and ask why I didn't get the last position. If possible, do it away from the office at a diner or even a couple blocks away from the office.

Here's my take on the thing.

Show me somebody too obsessed with golf without being some part of the professional tour, and I'll show you somebody who is at least somewhat complaceant about their job. Why do I say that? Well, if somebody plays golf twice a week, that's 8 to 10 hours they are spending on golf, and probably another 5 hours talking about it or reading golf magazines. That time doesn't generally make somebody a better sports editor or a better parent/spouse.

I don't think your sports editor gives a damn in the least about "developing talent". What does it matter to you anyway, if you have been piegeonholed - and make no mistake about it, you are being piegonholed. Maybe the people who went to other papers feel you SE wasn't so great. If you were better than this other writer who got the job, your SE did this because he figures he can get away with it and maybe he figures the other guy would have left if he didn't get the position. Your SE cares about his own position and paycheck, and you need to look out for yourself and not worry so much about him.

So your SE has "won awards" and "has a lot of knowledge which you would like to tap into". Hey, this sports writing ain't finding a cure for cancer or AIDS. It's organization and presentation. There seems to be a greater preoccupation with awards, and that seems to be in the same proportion as real salaries and opportunities for good beats seem to be going down.

So talk to your sports editor, but keep your options open. Your paper isn't the only opportunity, and maybe trying something for a different section of the newspaper or another paper might be the option, because it sounds like the most likely result here is that you are going to be even more frustrated.

 

[Dyno]

There's no need to hate the guy in order to have a discussion with him about your career growth. And you absolutely should not bring up golf or how you feel like you've been screwed. Keep the focus on you and asking him for advice on what *you* need to do to get where *you* want to be.

Go into the meeting prepared to talk about your accomplishments. You've got to sell yourself. Sometimes the squeaky wheel does get the grease. How do you know the people who've gotten the beats instead of you haven't lobbied for them (and I don't mean on the golf course)? I've learned from experience that sometimes the quiet, steady, good performer gets forgotten about or overlooked because they are so quiet and steady. Or it's possible that your editor thinks the fact that you haven't piped up and asked for one of these beats means that you're fine with where you are.

It's time to put your cards on the table and have a frank, non-confrontational talk with him.