Would you like breasts with your coffee?

No. I want a tall, skinny vanilla latte with Herpes Simplex 2 and a little whipped cream. Herpes Simplex 1 is fine, too. And I guess I could deal with nipple if the three second rule applied. Actually, I'm sitting at a Panera right now. And I'm looking at these employees. I'm looking real closely. They all look like they commit misdemeanors.

 

Do any look topless?

 

You should ask them to play basketball and throw "waded" up dollar bills at them.

"Why aren't you opening your underwear?"

 

Alright. If I'm not back in five minutes, someone come bail me out by tomorrow...I will probably be contracting Simplex 2 in jail tonight.

 

"I'll take the cleavage."

 

I played a similar game with a stripper-turned bartender who decided to strip again the night I was at a major dive bar in East Moline, Ill. Except she didn't try to catch them with her underwear. She tried to catch them with her ... well, let's just say she wasn't wearing underwear! As for the thread title, I don't drink coffee but it might be time to start if I ever visit Washington.

 

Two Gloves, I think I've been to that bar.

 

I think it's closed now. What a dive. Which was part of its charm! The best part was I started drinking shots with that bartender that night between the songs she was dancing. She'd buy a round, I'd buy a round. Can't beat that!

 

It's been too long since my last excursions to downtown East Mo

 

Would this be her? (NSFW obviously): http://www.huge-tits-boobs.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/chelseacharms-collage.jpg

How does the woman manage to stay upright?

 

Oh, my.