Women, men and phones

Hope this doesn't come off as too sexist:

OK, so the wife just called me from an airport (she was out of town this weekend), ostensibly to tell me what time to pick her up. So she tells me ... then begins talking ... and talking ... and talking. She asks me about my weekend. I spent 48 hours at home watching the NBA. Now I've moved onto the NFL. Not a lot to report there. "Well, did you watch any movies?" "No." "Oh."

Then the kicker - "Well, it would be nice if you would ask me how my weekend went."

Or she could, you know, just tell me, and not turn it into the latest windmill on the Husband Obtacle Course.

I jest, but I'm wondering - there are very real differences in the way men and women communicate, no? My wife was really the first serious relationship I've ever had - most of the time before, women were trying to get OFF the phone with me.

Women of SportsJournalists.com: Why does your kind like to talk on the phone so much? I see it as something to order pizza with. I feel like talking on it just to talk is a complete waste of time. Unless I'm conducting business like an interview on it, I'm no less anxious on the phone than I am when I'm waiting in a long gas station line. I just want to get it over with.

Is this a gap that men and women will just never be able to bridge?

 

Re: Men and Women: The differences

If you look at it as 'talking on it just to talk' then yes, you won't like it. But if your wife was looking for you to show an interest in her weekend, then that's what you use it for.

If she calls you during her break at work just because she's bored, then fine. Tell her you're busy. But when she's been out of town, I wouldn't think you saying 'How'd everything go' would have taken that much out of you.

 

Re: Men and Women: The differences

See, I knew this is what it would become. But understand this - when I pick her up, I will gladly listen for hours to how her weekend went. No problem at all. No annoyance.

But I have almost a physical reaction to sitting on the phone.

 

Re: Men and Women: The differences

If she gave you hardly any time before dissing you, then that's not right. But that sounds like a strange affliction you have about the phone. It'd be like having the creeps about watching television or putting on your shirt.

 

Re: Men and Women: The differences

I also hate talking on the phone

Here's what I think is most germane about Pringle's deal. Maybe he wants to talk about their weekend's face-to-face and not over the phone? Especially when he knows he's going to see his wife in a short bit of time anyway.

It does seem pretty superfluous to yak on the phone when you know you're going to see the same person in 30 minutes. To me, that's talking on the phone for the sake of talking on the phone. I'll never understand that.

 

I don't think it's a man-woman thing. Some people just like to talk on the phone. 95% of my phone calls last less than 30 seconds.
There's a guy at work though that spends much of his break period on his cell, and is on it again as he walks to his car at 11 o'clock. I assume at that hour he must be calling his family, but I'm not sure why it can't wait until he gets home. Whatever works for you, I guess.

 

Ok, let me clarify. I didn't mean Pringle should have had a 30-minute conversation about the weekend. But a simple "How'd it go?" allows her to say "fine!" and feel like you care, therefore opening for more conversation when you pick her up.

 

I, like both my late father and mother (unless she's talking to my sister) absolutely HATE talking on the phone.

Mom will go two or three minutes, and then I'll get a "Well, anyhoo ..." Which, of course, is fine with me.

I've taken to telling any potential girlfriends that I'm not a big phone talker right up front, and I've gotten reasonable responses and understanding. That way, they don't think I'm being short with them.

 

Well there's your problem. Put it up to your ear.

 

Most guys that I know don't like to talk on the phone. There's a couple of exceptions -- our sports intern that stayed at my house this summer, and a fellow beat writer. Man, my intern could talk. As for me, my fellow beat writers essentially voted me "Most likely to die from radiation exposure" or something like that because of the amount of time I spend on the phone. When I need a quick call, I can make it that, but usually, I'm calling someone to talk for a while. My phone time has gone down since I became single. Just my thoughts.

 

If I'm driving the 3.5 hours it takes to get to work for me, then yeah, I'm on the phone much of the time. It's a good time for catching up and making that call you've been meaning to make. If I'm at home, the only people I really talk to for extended periods of time are my folks and brother. Other than that, it's get on the phone and then end the conversation quickly. There are exceptions to the rule.

 

Add me to the list of people who hate talking on the phone. I see myself it as a tool, like a wrench or a screwdriver, rather than my only connection to the world at large. (I have SportsJournalists.com for that. )

Today's edition of Things We Learned About Our Fellow SportsJournalists.commers: Pringle is not one of those people who talks out of his ass.