Who gets what in your will.....

My 52" big-screen goes to Tomas.

fof gets a half-used package of Dr. Scholl's Medicated Corn Pads.

 

My Super Nintendo goes to my best friend, along with all my music; he'll split the albums with my ex-girlfriend and brother.

My friend Jason gets my DVDs, and my furniture and electronics go to my brother-in-law and sister.

No one gets my car because I'm going to die in a fiery car accident. It's God's will.

 

While getting road head. It will be the cruelest of fates.

 

My estate consists mostly of pizza coupons.

 

ijag gets most of my college football memorabilia just to remind her what she missed; Dixiehack gets all my Michigan stuff so he can start cheering for a real school.
Johnny Dangerously and Jesus Muscatel get joint custody of my Nick Saban voodoo doll.

 

BYH gets my collection of Mets media guides, all autographed by his friend jay.

 

I heard that's really what he wants. He's probably outside your house right now ... waiting.

 

Moddy gets all of my Virginia Tech and VCU gear which has the same value as 17 Schrute Bucks and 1,217 Stanley Nickles.

 

HC can have my autographed photo of Mike Palmateer

 

You get everything. Enjoy it.

 

You don't get diddly.

 

Starman can have my autographed picture of Larry Brown.