What bones have you broken?

Broke my orbital (eye socket) in high school playing baseball. That suuuuuucked.

 

Pain don't hurt.

 

Broke my right shoulder, or I guess my arm, playing football. Snapped the shaft of the bone from the knob at the end that fits in the shoulder socket. When I got tackled, my elbow caught a rock in the ground and it jerked my arm down, snapping the bone. As we came to a stop, my tackler's weight pushed my arm back up and the jagged edge of the bone popped behind my shoulder blade and broke the skin. I literally saw my own bone.

To this day, when I lift my right arm, sometime it hits a perfect angle and it will just roll right out of the socket.

 

Both hands.

Nothing else.

Well, except when the doctor in 1993 asked me if I knew I had broken my back. Finally nailed it down to sometime around 1981 when I had a major bicycle wreck. It grew back weird, and I eventually had to have a pair of rods screwed in to hold the L5 and S1 vertebra together.

The left hand during high school baseball tryouts, diving for a ball in center field. Would have caught the damn thing, too, except the three loud "pops" caused me to lose grip.

The right hand playing softball. Told the wife I broke it diving for a play at second base. Truth is, I overshot the grounder and punched the ground in frustration.

 

Tailbone when I was a kid, sledding. Well, more like demolition derby sledding.

 

A bunch of toes, most painfully the fourth toe on my right foot by accidentally kicking a barbell that served as our dorm room's doorstop. Had to take an English final with that sucker throbbing.

My right thumb when I was about nine after I accidentally swam into the edge of a pool (my eyes were closed because chlorinated hotel pools suck). I didn't fess up to my mom that it hurt for like two weeks, and we went into get it looked at and there was a night fracture right through it.

I also jammed fingers in all sorts of gruesome ways in grade school during recess playing a game where we stood on either sides of a tennis net and flung basketballs at each other as hard as we could. It was kind of like dodgeball, just with more injuries and third-grade rage. I suspect some of those fingers were actually fractured but we never got them x-rayed.

 

As far as broken bones go, just a green stick fracture of my right wrist when I was 10. However, my injury list is far longer. Six concussions. Torn rotator cuff. Several ankle sprains. Chipped bone in my elbow. Also battled back problems since I was in Grade 5. Doc also wants hack into both my knees, but that I'm probably not going to go for.

 

I'm 29 and have never broken a bone. That said, I have torn the cartilage in my knee to the point I will one day have it replaced, and I have ruptured a disc in my back.

 

Broke my collar bone in a car accident right before college. That sucked ass. Broke a few fingers playing football in high school. Otherwise, I've been pretty lucky.

 

Broke my nose playing intramural softball in college. I was playing second base, knelt down to field the ball and the guy running from first to second chose not to dodge me, instead running full speed knee to nose. It didn't hurt that bad, but there was blood everywhere.

Also in college, broke my left pinky finger when a friend of mind chose to throw a really hard spiral and I misjudged it. Hit right on top of the pinky. That finger is still a little crooked.

 

Chef scoffs at all of you.

Only thing I've ever broken is the second toe on my right foot. Did it walking up the stairs in the garage. My wife guffawed as I beat the shit out of the floor.

 

Arms, twice each. Second go-round was both wrists at the same time. I win!