US officials admit aliens present at Roswell

Wow.

http://www.ice.gov/pi/news/newsreleases/articles/060829roswell.htm

 

I knew it.

 

Those pesky aliens! They should put up a 22,000-parsec wall between us and Zeta Reticuli.

 

I have to admit, that's a great thread title.

 

Yeah, but the Zeta Reticulians will do jobs on earth that no other aliens will do. Just try to get a Romulan or a Klingon to cut a lawn or clean pools.

 

Literally, I laughed out loud.

 

Aliens make great laborers because their squid-like arms can handle mutiple tasks at once. It's no surprise why Pat Buchanan wants to keep them out of this country.

 

Paging Songbird!

 

Bravo Inky, bravo...

 

Nicely done, sir.

 

When you live in Roswell for any period of time longer than a 30-minute drive up and down the main drag on a sweltering Friday night looking for toothless crack whores who are more than willing to let you go A-T-M for a dime bag or two, you begin to notice that Roswell inhabitants, some of them, look like products of alien-human sexual relations. Aliens in Roswell? Damn straight, bubba. Then there's the Roswell legend of a cracked-out mother who sold her daughter (4 or 5 years old) in the Sonic parking lot for a couple of 8-balls. Such a sweet town, Roswell.

But, Cadet, we both know Roswell folk are nothing like the folk of Picacho Street ...