United tells people they're too fat to fly

How the hell do YOU fit on a plane?

 

I flew on a Frontier flight a few summers ago and was in an aisle on a 3-3 configuration plane.

That's one of the airlines that offers DirecTV for a nominal fee. I was looking forward to flipping channels to help pass the three hours or so we'd be in the air.

But as it turned out, that wasn't possible. There was a woman sitting next to me whose fat roll LITERALLY hung over the arm rest just enough to where I couldn't access the controls for the TV -- unless I asked her, 'Miss, could you lift up your fat for a second? I want to see what's on Discovery.'

I wound up staring at the moving map the whole trip instead.

 

Haha. I have to book the emergency aisle seat. Or the very first seat. Otherwise, an aisle seat and I stick one leg in the aisle.

 

I got to fly in that seat on my way back from Vegas a weekend ago... it was a nice luxury.

 

I love how serious some of the flight attendants take the whole emergency procedure.

I wasn't paying attention once and she was PISSED. I was like "I fly in this seat every time, I probably know the procedure as well as you do."

She still made me recite the procedure and asked me pop questions.

 

I know what you mean!

The lady was going through the procedure with me and my friend and asked us if we were willing and able to undertake the responsibilities associated with our seats.

I nodded my head and she practically yelled "I need a verbal response!"

Wow.

 

Kind of along the same lines of militant flight attendants...

I was sitting in my seat on a flight last month as we were taxiing out to take off, and had my iPod in my pocket, but off, and the ear buds wrapped around my neck and dangling down -- clearly, I was not listening to it.

Flight attendant comes by and asks me to put it away. I tell him it's off, and in my pocket. He said I had to take the earbuds from around my neck and put them in my pocket along with my iPod.

A simple request, to be sure. But I was so pissed doing it I could've spit nails. Just no reason for that, other than he wanted to be a prick.

Then, of course, I was in a seat that was so old it just kept reclining without me pushing the recline button. So two other times he had to ask me to put my seatback up as well, with me going, 'I ain't doing it on purpose. The seat SUCKS.'

Surprised they didn't report me to the local authorities.

 

They need to make the seats bigger. What worked in, say, 1975, may not work today.

A few years ago, I was on a 3-hour nonstop flight that was full to the gills. I was stuck in the middle in a 3-person row between two other large men. Couldn't twist, turn or hardly even breathe for three hours. Ended up hurting my lower back in the process.

This issue is one of several why I no longer fly.

 

Here's my favorite weight/flight story.

I'm in Philadelphia a couple of months ago, waiting to get a connection in its commuter terminal. A gate agent across the hall comes on the PA system and says the flight to . . . wherever . . . has a potential weight issue and they're looking for one volunteer to be bumped and go on the next flight. So this 5-foot, 90-pound woman walks up to the counter and volunteers. They load the plane and off they go.

If SHE'S the difference between that plane getting in the air or not, that's cutting it a little too close for my comfort.

 

One more chip on the pile ... I can't say enough bad things about United, and that was before this came down.

I would (and likely will) fly Biman Air before I fly United again.

 

um.. yeah. You bought one seat. How is it discrimination to not let you sit in one and a half seats?