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The Drama Queen Chronicles continue: Brown wants $40 million

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by Starman, Jun 30, 2006.

  1. Starman

    Starman Well-Known Member


    David Stern's response to this will be a big, hearty, two-fisted "Fuck You."

    Larry Brown will be awarded the massive sum of Zero Dollars and Zero Cents.

    For a number of reasons.

    First of all, NOT because David Stern has any big love or admiration for either James Dolan, or Isiah Thomas. They are both utterly incompetent fuckups who have certainly shit in their own beds, and now they can go lie in them.

    But, David Stern will give Larry Brown the giant blazing-hot red-hot poker up the poop chute for the following reasons:

    1. David Stern has been blazing mad at Larry Brown, ever since Larry Brown intentionally tanked the 2004 Olympic Games, in an infantile egomaniac hissy fit to stick it to the selection committee who failed to deliver each and every single player that Larry Brown wanted, and to the "selfish egotistical" players (such as LeBron James and Dwyane Wade) who would not, or COULD not, "Play The Right Way," play the brand of Hank Iba sludge-ball that Larry Brown sees as the ultimate manifestation of the game of basketball, so god damn it, if these ni ... uhhh young punks, WON'T play my way, I will send them down in flames, to show them what happens when you don't "Play The Right Way."

    Silly David Stern, he thought the job of the Olympic basketball coach was not to create a beautifully-functioning example of the art of clock-milking stall-ball and to win games 53-52, but instead to WIN, any way and whatever way it took. When Larry Brown took that concept and pissed all over it, pissing all over the concept of NBA players in the Olympics in the process, he went on David Stern's shit list for life.

    The next reason is this. As Commissioner, David Stern has one overriding goal: to make sure that the public believes, as much as possible, that NBA competiton is on the level. Every year, he has to stomp out rumors about teams tanking games to get better draft choices, refs affecting the outcomes of playoff games, the league manipulating playoff series to maximize TV ratings. Every year, there are tons of rumors, and every year, David Stern furiously stamps them out.

    As soon as the public becomes seriously convinced NBA games are crooked, the NBA becomes Big Time Wrestling, and disappears to tape-delay on ESPN The Ocho. David Stern cannot allow that to happen, so he has to come down with a 10-ton shit-hammer on anything which gives the appearance of games being fixed, thrown or tanked.

    Usually, when you hear the words "fixed, thrown or tanked," you automatically think of refs or players engineering games in order to get payoffs from gamblers. But if a game is "fixed, thrown or tanked," who gives a shit WHY it was "fixed, thrown or tanked" ?? What the flaming-fuck difference does it make?

    As far as David Stern is concerned, a player tanking games to get a $10 million payoff from gamblers, and a coach tanking games for nothing, just for his own little drama-queen hissy-fit temper-tantrum effort to prove what idiots his GM and owners are, and how stupid his players are for not "Playing The Right Way," is the same goddamn thing. Either the game is on the level or it's not. When fans watch NBA games, they have to at least believe everybody involved is really trying to win.

    David Stern cannot tolerate games being tanked. He is going to make Larry Brown his own personal Hiroshima to prove it.

    There's a few other reasons, too. But that's the one that counts.

    Brown, of course, will threaten to go to court. Good luck. Brown may not know what the phrase "material breach of contract" means, but the courts will educate him.
  2. heyabbott

    heyabbott Well-Known Member

    Stern has to make a Solomon-esq decision, how do you stick it to both Brown and Thomas?
  3. spnited

    spnited Active Member

    Sorry, Star, but this is hardly big news.
    Brown had a clause in his contract that any dispute over payment was to be arbitrated by Stern. And if you think Stern is just going to say FU to Brown because of the Olympics, you're nuts.
    Stern has already called Dipshit Dolan and told him to clean up this mess fast. I'm sure his next call will be to tell CablevisionBoy to settle with Larry for $20-25 mill or so and STFU.
    Brown is definitely walking away from this with a large chunk of change.
  4. Starman

    Starman Well-Known Member

    He doesn't have to worry about sticking it to Thomas. He is more than capable of doing that to himself, in a big way.

    It's not just the Olympics. It's the fundamental integrity of the league.

    David Stern cannot have coaches (or owners or players or refs or anybody else), going around and intentionally dumping games, for whatever reasons seem good to them at the time.

    When you watch an NBA game as a fan, you have to have a reasonable certainty that all parties involved are doing their best to win.
  5. heyabbott

    heyabbott Well-Known Member

    Maybe Brown will sue Thomas and the Knicks for racial discrimination citing the famous case of Ray Rhodes v. Green Bay standing for the propostion that the head coach is entitled to recieve more than 1 year to fail where the race of the GM differs from that of the head coach.

    I understand Jesse Jackson will pay Larry Brown's tutition at North Carolina until his eligiblilty runs out.
  6. Double Down

    Double Down Well-Known Member

    I agree with a lot of what you wrote about Brown, Starman, but the line I've bolded was bullshit. Larry Brown is an equal opportunity hater of all young guys, not just young black guys. The guy confessed his love for Allen Iverson in that big ass article by Gary Smith. C'mon.

    Also, if Stern gives Larry Brown nothing, it will only feed the conspiracy that he is trying to help the league's premier franchise. I bet he splits the difference and Brown gets $20 million.
  7. cranberry

    cranberry Well-Known Member

    This is all very amusing but it doesn't have anything to do with what Brown's final settlement will be. One thing pretty clear is that Dolan doesn't have a very good "breach of contract" case. Brown will be paid - a lot.
  8. Starman

    Starman Well-Known Member

    Brown has already been paid a lot. $10 million for winning 23 goddamn games. Oh yes, he is also being paid $14 million or something on the OTHER contract he breached, with the Detroit Pistons.

    That's another reason for Stern to come down hard here: to attempt to stamp out blatant contract-jumping by carpetbagger coaches.
  9. Webster

    Webster Well-Known Member

    In the next couple of weeks, you will hear that a settlement has been reached. Stern doesn't want this crap in the papers anymore.

    If I had to guess, Brown gets another $20 million guaranteed and another $10 million which will be set off against any other earnings he has as a head coach.
  10. Ace

    Ace Well-Known Member

    What a jerk that Larry Brown!!!

    Who does he think he is, demanding to be paid the money owed him?

    The nerve of the man!!!!!
  11. dixiehack

    dixiehack Well-Known Member

    That's a hell of an accusation to make without proof.
  12. Football_Bat

    Football_Bat Well-Known Member

    Suspend Avery Johnson for life and mandate Brown become the Mavericks coach. Then you screw both the Knicks AND Cuban.

    Stern would have to change his satins.
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