Team Paranoia strikes again

That would the Portland Trail Blazers, the team that takes nonsensical to a new level. Following today's workout involving Adam Morrison, Brandon Roy, Hassan Adams and Rudy Gay, the Blazers issued this statement.......it was the result of a reporter getting information on the workout by looking through the blinds in the media workroom.

STATEMENT FROM TRAIL BLAZERS REGARDING

MEDIA ACCESS TO PRE-DRAFT WORKOUTS

PORTLAND, Ore. – Due to the actions of a reporter revealing sensitive information from the team’s pre-draft workout session today, the Portland Trail Blazers regret to announce they will be forced to close workouts indefinitely.

The reporter admitted obtaining his information by peeping through the blinds of the team's media work room at the practice facility, while waiting to gain entry to the practice floor. The reporter was there along with numerous other media outlets, at the invitation of the team, for access to the final minutes of the workout session and to interview the players involved.

The reporter’s information first appeared in a blog and then was widely disseminated locally and nationally. The Trail Blazers accept responsibility for not ensuring that the reporter would attempt to peer through closed blinds and is taking immediate steps to rectify the situation.

“We regret having to take these actions.” said Team President Steve Patterson. “But these workouts have significant impact on the futures of these young men as well as our organization. That’s why these workouts are often closed. We were more than willing to work with the media to help our fans learn more about our potential draft picks and be as open as possible. It’s a shame that on what has been one of the biggest media days leading up to our draft, a single reporter has breached the professional trust for all of us.”

 

Unless, say, Jason Quick was reporting that Adam Morrison was seen giving Rudy Gay a blowjob while Paul Allen pleasured himself, this is perhaps the dumbest freak out by a team ever.

 

Good fucking shit, this is a joke, right?

"Don't look thru the closed blinds."

The Belichicking of the world continues.

 

Damn. Great work by the reporter!

 

How would that affect Morrison's draft status?

 

You'd be paranoid, too, if seemingly every draft pick for the last 20 years has ended up doing jail time.

 

I'm going to defer to Chad Ford on this one. He is, after all, a professor of conflict resolution.

 

ESPN.com's Chad Ford reports that it is unclear whether Morrison's cocksucking would be viewed as a pro or con by NBA scouts.

EDIT: I'm defying D_B status on this one. I was beaten by 12 seconds. Damn you, Double Down!   

 

ESPN.com's Chad Ford reports that NBA scouts view Morrison's crying as a negative.

 

Anyone know what was reported?

 

http://www.oregonlive.com/weblogs/blazersoregonian/

 

Excellent.