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Summer wrestling column

Discussion in 'Writers' Workshop' started by LemMan, Jul 14, 2006.

  1. LemMan

    LemMan Member

    Hey all...

    Swing away.

    http://www.bradenton.com/mld/bradenton/sports/columnists/john_lembo/15034349.htm
     
  2. jay_christley

    jay_christley Member

    Not bad.
    But the thing that caught me was the simile in lede was wrong.

    The tradition grabs you like a half-nelson. It grabs you early, the second you step into the foyer of Manatee High's gymnasium.

    You don't grab somebody in a half-nelson.
    You can grab somebody in a full-nelson, in which you have your arms hooked under both of your opponent's and snaked up around back of their neck. It's also a move that's illegal in high school wrestling.
    The half-nelson, in which slide your arm under just one of their arms, is less of a hold in which you would grab somebody with and more a means to roll the guy over from their stomach onto their back for a pin.
    It's a matter of technical jargon and many readers may have read right past it, but I found it a little jarring.
     
  3. TheHandOfGod

    TheHandOfGod New Member

    It does stop you, if you know the lingo, Jay. But like you said, I'd imagine most read right over it. That's what I hope happens whenever I make mistakes.
     
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