ShameWow!

Beat me to it.

 

"Here’s some blood, semen and saliva. Not only is the damage gonna be on top - there’s your mildew. That is going to smell! See that? The most absorbing We’re gonna do this in real time! Look at this! Put it on the bodily fluids, turn it over! Without even putting pressure, fifty percent of the DNA is right there. You follow me, camera guy? The other fifty percent, the color starts to come up. No other towel’s gonna do that!"

 

That's quality, Inky.

 

This man has stood up against Scientology. He's OK in my book.

And I wouldn't be surprised if the Scientologists had something to do with this fiasco.

 

Naw. It was a plot by Billy Mays to disgrace the competition. OxyClean sales are down 37 percent since this ShamWow prick showed up on the scene.

 

Like battered hookers? Then you'll love my nuts:

.

 

I kind of want one of those.

 

Pay me $1,000, and I'll deliver it.

 

Awesome.

 

These are the threads that make me love SportsJournalists.com.

 

OMG that's a Nick Nolte-like WTF mug shot. i also thought he was obnoxious 20-30 something tool guy.

 

But wait! There's more!