Second child coming - what am I in for?

LTL,

What's the age range for your four?

 

Ridiculously disorganized -- 14/12/6/2.

Hell of a lot of fun, though. The two oldest (and their friends) with the baby are a riot.

I would be interested to read about whether there any broad conclusions (psychological studies etc.) about this point, but in our experience it has been just the opposite. By the time the "second wave" of kids came, the first ones were in school already and relatively self-sufficient as far as handling themselves around the house when we were dealing with the baby. I don't think we would have been that great with four kids under 8.

 

When you can't afford cable TV and to hire a babysitter so you and the misses can go out to eat, you have to pass the time somehow...

 

Friends of friends had 4 kids, 22 to 17. They decided to have one more when the youngest was 14 so they put it to a family discussion/vote. Everyone was in favor so she had her tubes untied and they had one more. Seeing the young adults and teenagers with the baby is a lot of fun.

 

My sister had five kids in seven years.

They are all grown now.

 

I'm glad your situation works. I look at my sister's situation (kids 11, 9 and six months) and I don't understand why it's so much harder for her now than it was with the first two. She has two kids who can help with feedings and diapers and one who can babysit, but she sounds like she's about to have a nervous breakdown.

My best friend had the same situation. His kids are 10, 8 and 2 and his wife freaked out so much after the third was born that a very happy marriage went sideways almost immediately and they're getting divorced now. She's told friends that if they hadn't had the third they would have been fine... It's really a brutal situation to watch.

 

For what it's worth: Mom survey says: Three is the most stressful number of kids

http://www.today.com/moms/mom-survey-says-three-most-stressful-number-kids-6C9774150

 

I have several friends who had (have) kids with various medical issues and been through a miscarriage myself, and every time I see or hear someone with beautiful, healthy kids grumble about how they didn't get the gender of their choice, it makes me want to backhand them into next week.

This ain't Game of Thrones. No one needs a boy carry on their line. Girls can play catch in the yard too.

 

Yeah, I had no preference in either case.

Funny story: When my first was born, the doctors said, "What is it, dad?"

I completely forgot to even check the gender, I guess I was so excited.

I looked at the clock and said, "1:18."

They said, "No, not the time! The gender!"

Only then did I have the presence of mind to look and see whether I had a son or a daughter.

 

I really agree with this. People say, "Oh, easy for you to say, you have two boys..." but I had zero preference the first time and the second time my wife and I both were rooting for a boy because we already had the clothing, but we would not have been the slightest bit disappointed if it was a girl.

 

Once you have at least two, you can force them to becoming a performing act.

Make one learn the guitar and make the other learn the tambourine. Make them both learn to sing and dance.

 

If we had kids, I'd have them out busking all weekend every weekend.