Read those drug labels carefully, kids.

I come before you as a cautionary tale, SportsJournalists.com brethren (and "sistren"?): read those labels carefully before you pop those over-the-counter drugs. So, here's my story: Suffering from a sinus headache and congestion that would have felled a whole team of Clydesdales on Thursday, I stopped by the local drugstore and searched for the medication that seemed it would help the most. Settled on Maximum Strength Sudafed PE, largely on the fact that it had twice as much (10mg per dose) of the ingredient it says is its nasal decongestant than the others I spied.

Took it home, glanced at the directions and popped two pills to settle in for a night of healing slumber. Friday morning, the headache's almost gone, the congestion is certainly less, but I'm still zonked outta my freakin' head. And another strange thing: I'm having trouble focusing my eyes. It gets a little better throughout the day, but not really. Because I'm staying at home, working on the computer and watching the TV in bed, I don't notice that I can focus pretty well on close objects, but far away objects? It seems like I'm the crosseyed bastard child of Marty Feldman -- double vision to a fare thee well. Of course, I only learn this when I head out to the car to drive for some vaunted chicken soup from the local Chinese restaurant (no delivery, dammit). W.T.F.

Chalk it up to either some effect of the sinus pressure or sleeping on the side of my face that has screwed with my eye. Problem is, Saturday comes and my problem has only slightly diminished. So, I start to suspect the Sudafed.

That's when I spy my problem. Dose is only one pill, not two. I misread that one. And that nasal decongestant? It's phenylephrine, which is the same shit they use to dilate your pupils for eye exams. Further internet reading turns up the fact that some people "may be hypersensitive" to it. I'm now pretty sure I'm one. And I've taken twice as much of the shit as you're supposed to.

It's now Sunday morning, and I'm almost back to normal, but have another day (at least) of not driving anywhere lest I run over churchgoers on the sidewalks of my fair city.

Crap. Some people are too stoopid to still be alive.

 

The churchgoers would deserve it...

 

I always read the drug labels carefully and with Sudafed know its just one tablet, not two. And if you're taking Robatussen cough medicine with a dosing cup, usually you just need half the cup to get the full adult dose.

 

Isn't Sudafed one of the ingredients used to make meth? Once I heard that, I moved onto different over the counter stuff.

 

When you get back to normal, have your blood pressure checked.

And consider Coricidin next time.

 

The version with pseudoephedrine (the primary precursor of crystal meth) was moved behind the counter under most state laws several years ago. In Oregon, a prescription is required. Most of the cold-pill makers, including the company which makes Sudafed, have switched to phenyephrine instead, but at the very least it's less effective and a University of Florida study in 2006 found it to be ineffective at the recommended dose and unsafe at higher doses. Researchers from GlaxoSmithKline have published a counterstudy questioning the UF study, of course. : Neither drug is friendly to those with hypertension.

 

Will do, 2. Thanks. (I already suspect it's probably sky-friggin'-high.)

 

That used to drive me insane when I lived in Oregon (in a part of the state where Meth use was really bad). I remember going into a rite aid and asking for sudafed and the clerk looked at me like I was an idiot.

 

Pseudoephedrine works. I always ask the pharmacist for it. For me, no side effects.