Now THIS is a song! (lyrics NSFW)

Just heard this song called "Homecoming" by a band called The Teenagers, who are from Paris. Creepiest lyrics I've heard since "Hey Mister" by Custom. It's kind of a duet, with a guy singing part of the song and a woman singing the other part, but they don't really sing together. A lot of it is kinda spoken word, barely sung at all over the music. Anyway, here's the lyrics:

DUDE
last week i flew to san diego to see my antie
on day 1 i met her hot step daughter
shes a cheerleader, she is a virgin and she is really tan
as she stepped out of her massive car
i could only notice she was more than fuckable
i think she was coming back from the game or something
cause she was holding those silly pompoms
on day 2 i fucked her and it was wild
she is such a slut

i fucked my american pussycat
CHICK
i loved my english romance
DUDE
i fucked my american pussycat
CHICK
i loved my english romance
it was dirty a dream came true
just like i like it shes got nice tits
CHICK
it was perfect a dream came true
just like a song by blink182

ok listen girls
i met the hottest guy ever
basically as I was stepping out of my s.u.v.
i came face to face with my step cousin or whatever
who cares
anyway he was wearing skinny jeans had funky hair
and the cutest british accent ever
straight away I could tell he was a rocker
with his sexy attitude and the way he looked at me
mmm he is totally awesome
oh my god I think im in love

DUDE
i fucked my american pussycat
CHICK
i loved my english romance
DUDE
i fucked my american pussycat
CHICK
i loved my english romance
DUDE
it was dirty a dream came true
just like i like it shes got nice tits
CHICK
it was perfect a dream came true
just like a song by blink182

DUDE
i fucked my american pussycat
CHICK
i loved my english romance
DUDE
i fucked my american pussycat
CHICK
i loved my english romance
DUDE
it was so nice to meet you
CHICK
pleasure is mine I do like you
come to cancun for springbreak
DUDE
ill think about it it could be great
CHICK
dont forget to send me a friend request!
DUDE
as if!

Song can be heard on their MySpace page: http://www.myspace.com/theteenagers

 

That's just flat out dumb.

 

Please. "A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When the Stripper Is Crying" by Bloodhound Gang is more enjoyable.

 

I never knew missing children could be so sexy.

Did I say that out loud?

 

Well, that night I lost myself to ruby red lips, milky white skin and baby blue eyes.

Name was Russell.

 

Got to nail her in the back of her trailer.
Heh. That rhymes.

 

Colt .45 by Afroman-that song is really f-d up

 

No reference to Billy Joel's "Captain Jack"? Meh ...

 

I prefer "Foxtrot Unicorn Charlie Kilo" by the Gang.

Vulcanize the whoopee stick
In the ham wallet

Cattle prod the oyster ditch
With the lap rocket

Batter dip the cranny ax
In the gut locker

Retrofit the pudding hatch
Ooh la la
With the boink swatter

If i get you in the loop when I make a point to be straight with you then
In lieu of the innuendo in the end know my intent though
I brazillian wax poetic so pathetically
I don't wanna beat around the bush

Foxtrot Unifrom Charlie Kilo
Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo

Marinate the nether rod
In the squish mitten

Power drill the yippee bog
With the dude piston

Pressure wash the quiver bone
In the bitch wrinkle

Cannonball the fiddle cove
Ooh la la
With the pork steeple

If i get you in the loop when I make a point to be straight with you then
In lieu of the innuendo in the end know my intent though
I brazillian wax poetic so pathetically
I don't wanna beat around the bush

Foxtrot Unifrom Charlie Kilo
Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo

Put the you know what in the you know where
Put the you know what in the you know where
Put the you know what in the you know where
Put the you know what in the you know where pronto

 

dumbass.

 

This song sucks. And besides, the band can't call themselves The Teenagers for much longer ... Right?

 

Go fuck yourself, anonymous message-board poster.