no four-leaf clovers on St. Patrick's Day, please

No offence to our Irish friends here, but I think St. Patrick's Day is my least favorite day of the year. A bunch of phony non-Irish celebrating the national holiday of a country they've never been to, even in their dreams, because they think it's all about drinking green beer and puking in the bushes. Fuck them.

I mean, good Christ, where was everybody on St. David's Day? My dad and I were drinking by ourselves.

But this isn't about petty jealousy, at least not entirely. I love Ireland. I had one of the best weeks of my life there, and I have plenty of Irish friends. But I'm not Irish, I'm not going to pretend to be Irish, ever, and I'm not going to drink tonight to celebrate some national holiday that really means nothing more to me than Burkina Faso's National Day, whatever that is.

No, I'm going to drink tonight because I want to get drunk.

 

I'm going to have a beer tonight. But since I'm Nova Scotian Irish, I'm going to drink Nova Scotian beer.

Damn the rest of you to hell.

 

Oh, it's one of the most amateurish of the amateur nights. I avoid the pubs like a Southern Baptist during the annual pub crawl put on my some civic organization.

I'll do my pub crawling when it's not as crowded. And when the Guinness isn't served in plastic go cups.

 

Oh, I'm ok with Bushmills, owing to my Ulster connections.

As for St. Patrick's Day in the USA being full of fail, unless you're in an Irish-American enclave, yeah, there's an abundance of fail. Meaningless excuse to drink and for beer companies to distribute plastic trinkets...Mardi Gras without the gold and purple.

 

With sentiment like that, you're Irish in your soul.
I think it's getting a little dusty in here.

 

God Bless You, Jones.

And no green beer. Ever.

 

Strained through the wrong bible, wi.

 

I never go out on St. Patrick's Day. I'll treat tonight like any other day of the year: I'll have a beer and fall asleep.

 

Told you. ;D

 

As you know, FB and Zeke, although I'm a Republican, I've both Protestant and Catholic heritage. Consequently, I'm decidedly non-sectarian. Although I loathe the Orange Order, I'm a member of the Episcopalian Church. As Wolfe Tone and others have demonstrated, you don't have to be a Roman Catholic to favor a United Ireland.

 

True dat, as we say around John B Keane's.
I also think Bushmills is a little harsh.

 

I have everything covered.

My ancestors are from Ireland, England and Scotland.

And I'm with Jones. St. Patrick's Day, along with New Year's Eve is Amateur Hour.