Name the team contest sponsored by the paper

Anybody else have a shop that got a new school or a new team and the paper helped sponsor a "name the team" competition?

My shop started one for our new high school, to be finished by the end of the decade. It's a bit early, I agree. Winner gets his/her name on the dedication plaque in the lobby. I don't know what the paper's role is other than to provide a means for people to suggest names.

This is another way to show just how stupid readers are. Here are a few examples with my comments in parenthesis ...

1. Podunk High (nice, but the current school is named that)
2. Grizzlies (nice and submitted by about eight people, but the current school is Bruins and another team in the conference is named Grizzlies)
3. Polor bears (yes, I noticed it was misspelled)
4. Dare Devils (not a bad name, but submitted by an insurance company in hopes of a permanent free ad)
5. Raiders w/silver and black (submitted by the too-obsessed Legion baseball coach)
6. Rock crushers (an activity if you're doing a hard 25 in the state pen)

Anybody else have this problem?

 

Tell the insurance company to pay for a nice scoreboard, sound system and press box and Dare Devils they shall be.

A box of Devil Dogs sounds good right about now. Throw my name in for that.
Podunk Directional Devil Dogs.

 

Knowing what I know about this new school and the area, I'd suggest something along the Dare Devils line, but come up with something a little less corporate and less 'Evil.'

And considering the market size, it's not a problem for the paper to get involved.

Stay away from the Tigers, Bobcats, Spartans, Bulldogs, Hornets, or even the Cutthroats. Maybe something like the Bungee Jumpers would work out for you.

 

How about something whussy. The Girl Scouts. The Bumblebees. The Roses. The Mice.

You know, not enough teams go that rout. A team's nickname should be emblematic of the school, and there are too many school that really suck at sports and life in general but still get called the 'Tigers' or 'Spartans' or 'Warriors', as if they could beat anything above a fifth-grade tee ball team at any sport, let alone win a war or maul another animal.

The Podunk Feebles. That's the way to go.

 

There's a summer wood-bat league team in North Carolina called the Outer Banks Daredevils. Dare being the county in which they play. I would have gone with the Outer Banks Traffic Nightmares Where Everyone Has Those Stupid OBX Bumper Stickers, but that's just me.

One of the schools in the area, no longer in existence, had some of the worst test scores in the state. Their sports teams were called the Kougars. You had to love it.

 

How about my high school? The Unicorns. Surprisingly, we didn't have a football team.

 

It's just my opinion, but I know I wouldn't step on a field in opposition of a team called the Rabid Kujo-- sponsored, of course, by the local animal control office.

 

With the Shiite Jaysusites in control all across the nation, you can probably forget "Devils" or any variation thereof.

 

The Shockers

 

we were the red devils and every year some jeezus nut would get their panties in a wad about it being 'demonic' and 'satanic' -- we had a club boys volleyball team that called themselves the chrysanthemums just to be dicks about it

 

The Outer Banks was a great place to live nine months out of the year. The summers were hell.