My wife is going vegan

The Big Ragu · Dec 19, 2007

Buck said:

It's no wonder the average life expectancy has dropped so precipitously over the last several decades.
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Sorry to shit on the sarcasm. Peeve of mine. But are you willing to factor in that health care costs have outpaced inflation by double digit numbers? Lipitor (and the costs associated with people taking all of the relatively new blood pressure, cholesterol, diabetes, you-name-it, etc. medications) wouldn't be accounting for longer life expectancies if people ate healthier and weren't so much fatter and in poor health than they were a generation ago. And we wouldn't have quite the health care crisis on our hands that people are so wrapped up in at the moment, because we wouldn't be keeping people alive longer by spending a fortune on these self-inflicted medical problems.

old_tony · Dec 19, 2007

Zeke12 said:

old_tony said:

The Good Doctor said:

I'm a Level Four Vegan. I don't eat anything that casts a shadow.
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On a sunny day, plants cast shadows. So what does that leave?
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Wow.

Humorless doesn't even begin to encapsulate it.
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I got all the humor I need for a while reading about Norman Stansfield's fantasy football victory this past weekend. 8)

mike311gd · Dec 19, 2007

21 said:

mike311gd said:

considering her love for hamburgers, chicken wings, meat sauce on her pasta -- as well as the cock...
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If she really loved meat sauce on cock, I'd say you got off easy.

(Even if you didn't get off, um, like that.)
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Very nice. Nothing gets on my cock. Seriously. It's sad.

mike311gd · Dec 19, 2007

buckweaver said:

mike311gd said:

21 said:

mike311gd said:

considering her love for hamburgers, chicken wings, meat sauce on her pasta -- as well as the cock...
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If she really loved meat sauce on cock, I'd say you got off easy.

(Even if you didn't get off, um, like that.)
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Very nice. Nothing gets on my cock. Seriously. It's sad.
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Hey, Champ, why don't you sit the next couple plays out? :-\
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No way, sir. I'm a gamer ... like Cal Ripken and Jeff Feagles ... and A.C. Green.

Trouser_Buddah · Dec 19, 2007

mike311gd said:

The kicker? We broke up a few months later and she began to eat meat again -- hamburgers, chicken wings, meat sauce on her pasta and all the cock in the fucking state of New York.
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Vats of dong = soy free

Boom_70 · Dec 19, 2007

21 said:

At first glance I thought the headline said 'virgin.'

That would have been an interesting thread.

Carry on.
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Well a lot of middle eastern women have surgery to have their hyman restored so I guess it's possible.

Lugnuts · Dec 19, 2007

A lot of my friends are vegetarians.

My brother and his wife are vegetarians. (They are pregnant right now, and it'll be interesting to see if they make their kid one.)

While many of them are very thin, they don't seem totally healthy to me. Something seems missing.

The older I get, the more I realize the most brilliant phrase ever was, 'In everything moderation.'

And that includes meat.

Gold · Dec 19, 2007

My 12-year-old daughter is vegetarian and I can deal with that because she doesn't put anybody else out. I don't think I could deal with her being a vegan. It's one thing not to eat a hamburger, it's another thing not to eat pizza (and don't tell me that something with imitation cheese is pizza).

KYSportsWriter · Dec 19, 2007

mike311gd said:

This pisses me off even now, five years later. ...

For about a year, my ex-girlfriend decided to get all trendy and become a vegetarian. I didn't think she'd be able to pull it off, considering her love for hamburgers, chicken wings, meat sauce on her pasta -- as well as the cock, in particular the members of other men not named Mike (though I didn't find out that until later).

Much to my surprise, she was able to do it. She gave up going to Wing Night at the hometown sports bar we frequented and she switched to salads along with taking the proper supplements. It didn't really impact my eating habits, thankfully. When she made pasta, we went without the meat sauce, and I was cool with it. I figured, if she's going to feed me, I won't bitch about it.

I was very cool with what she was doing ... until one awful evening. We went on a double date with a couple good friends of mine, and she and I ordered a big plate of nachos -- my favorite appetizer. I looked at her before I ordered and asked the waitress to bring us an order of nachos sans meat; I looked at the girlfriend so she'd see the pain in my eyes, and she was appreciative later. And she fucking needed to be. Because when the waitress came back, she set down the world's most glorious-looking nacho platter -- complete with cheese, lettuce, sour cream and hot peppers. Unfortunately, all those toppings were covering the ground beef.

I called the waitress back and, again, looked at the girlfriend and said -- with my eyes affixed on the short, blond bitch -- "We can't eat this because she's a vegetarian." And off the glorious-looking nacho platter went. It was fucking heart-breaking.

The kicker? We broke up a few months later and she began to eat meat again -- hamburgers, chicken wings, meat sauce on her pasta and all the cock in the fucking state of New York.

Fucking vegetarians.
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I'm sorry, bro, but this story is fucking hilarious.

mike311gd · Dec 19, 2007

KYSportsWriter said:

mike311gd said:

This pisses me off even now, five years later. ...

For about a year, my ex-girlfriend decided to get all trendy and become a vegetarian. I didn't think she'd be able to pull it off, considering her love for hamburgers, chicken wings, meat sauce on her pasta -- as well as the cock, in particular the members of other men not named Mike (though I didn't find out that until later).

Much to my surprise, she was able to do it. She gave up going to Wing Night at the hometown sports bar we frequented and she switched to salads along with taking the proper supplements. It didn't really impact my eating habits, thankfully. When she made pasta, we went without the meat sauce, and I was cool with it. I figured, if she's going to feed me, I won't bitch about it.

I was very cool with what she was doing ... until one awful evening. We went on a double date with a couple good friends of mine, and she and I ordered a big plate of nachos -- my favorite appetizer. I looked at her before I ordered and asked the waitress to bring us an order of nachos sans meat; I looked at the girlfriend so she'd see the pain in my eyes, and she was appreciative later. And she fucking needed to be. Because when the waitress came back, she set down the world's most glorious-looking nacho platter -- complete with cheese, lettuce, sour cream and hot peppers. Unfortunately, all those toppings were covering the ground beef.

I called the waitress back and, again, looked at the girlfriend and said -- with my eyes affixed on the short, blond bitch -- "We can't eat this because she's a vegetarian." And off the glorious-looking nacho platter went. It was fucking heart-breaking.

The kicker? We broke up a few months later and she began to eat meat again -- hamburgers, chicken wings, meat sauce on her pasta and all the cock in the fucking state of New York.

Fucking vegetarians.
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I'm sorry, bro, but this story is fucking hilarious.
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I laugh at the memory, too. But every time I am handed a nacho platter, I can't help to think back to 2002 and cringe.

Perry White · Dec 19, 2007

Bubbler said:

Hank_Scorpio said:

I had a friend that was vegetarian. He even told me it wasn't because meat was bad for you. "I'm a vegetarian because raising cattle is bad for the environment, with the cutting of rainforest for grazing land, and cow flatulence in the ozone and such.

He then asked me, what are you doing to help the environment?"

I said, "I'm eatin' the cow."
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I've always wondered ... what do vegans/vegetarians/environmentalists want to do with the cows we save by not eating them? I've never heard a sensible answer to that question.

They have no natural habitat we're disturbing, they're domesticated animals, it's not as if you can let them run out in the wild, something will eat them.
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I think they do that in India

joe · Dec 19, 2007

The Big Ragu said:

I have been a vegetarian for more than 14 years and have flirted with veganism for the last few years. I haven't had any dairy or egg for at least a half a year, so I guess I am officially vegan now. I also don't eat any soy, believe it or not, so it is none of those processed soy products that are made to emulate non-vegan foods for me. My diet basically consists of whole grains, every vegetable you can imagine, occasionally some fruit, but not a whole lot, nuts (raw almonds) sometimes as snacks and every kind of bean you can imagine. Everything I eat is pretty pure. A lot of whole wheat pasta and brown rice, mixed with vegetable and bean related things. I do almost all my cooking for myself. I cook with zero to no fat. Occasionally I will add a table spoon of olive oil to something, but I mostly rely on spices to get my flavor.
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Well, god bless you Ragu. But there's no way I could go through life without a juicy medium rare to rare porterhouse steak and a baked potato with a shitload of butter. If it moos, oinks or cock-a-doodle-doos, I'm eating it.
Life's too short. I'd rather live to 70 and eat what I want than 75 and eat twigs and beans all the time.

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My wife is going vegan

The Big Ragu Moderator Staff Member

old_tony Well-Known Member

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My wife is going vegan

The Big Ragu Moderator Staff Member

old_tony Well-Known Member

mike311gd Active Member

mike311gd Active Member

Trouser_Buddah Active Member

Boom_70 Well-Known Member

Lugnuts Well-Known Member

Gold Active Member

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