Man goes over Niagara Falls and lives

The moron hopped a retaining wall, jumped into the Niagara River above the Horseshoe Falls and was swept over. The force of the current ripped off his clothes but not his head, unfortunately. It tried, though - he's being treated for "a large head wound" and "severe hypothermia."

http://www.thestar.com/News/Canada/article/600681

 

By the sounds of things, he fucked up a suicide attempt.

999 times out of 1,000 it's a done deal.

Looser.

 

Big Ed Delahanty weeps.

 

Agreed. And then, EMS personnel have to risk their own lives to rescue the idiot.

http://www.buffalonews.com/home/story/604520.html

 

More amazing than surviving the fall is still being alive after spending 40 minutes in that freezing water.

 

I blame Obama. [/wingnutnation]

 

He didn't get part of the bailout money

 

Ni-agara Falls!
Slowly I turned, step by step, inch by inch...

 

can't wait for the story where he finds Jesus at the bottom of the falls.

 

One of the most memorable Stooges scenes ever. (W/ redux, natch.)

Although my favorite would be the ice fishin' scene in "Rockin' In the Rockies."

Larry: "That fish looks like Moe."

Curly: "It IS Moe!"

Moe: "Do I look like a sucka???"

 

I'm imagining the following opening from The 700 Club.

"John Doe jumped toward Hell, but he landed closer to Heaven..."