Lefty Specialist?

When I was in elementary school, I had to use those stupid, four-ringed, red scissors while everyone else used cool yellow ones. Every time I cut, people would look at me. I remember playing whiffle ball in seventh grade. My friend and I were ripping on each other, and he looked at me and said, "You know what's cool? I can cut paper with no problem at all." That hurt.

From that day forward, I switched hands and now don't even bother trying with the left. It's obvious the craft industry doesn't give a fuck about me, so I had to conform. Call me a sell-out, I don't care. I just wanted to cut my own paper during the holidays. Was it too much to ask to do it with a pair of good lefties? Yeah, I guess. The right-handers will get theirs in time. You'll see.