"Knockout" game goes horribly wrong for two teens

Wonder if the following line from the story would have made our paper:

"Beulah who is a member of her local neighborhood watch said she has always carried a gun after being mugged once before. "Its a shame you can't walk through your own neighborhood where you are supposed to feel safe without being assulted and mistreated," she continues. "I purchased the gun hoping I would never have to use it, but I'm glad to still be in the land of the living."

"The same cannot be said for her two victims ..."

 

That made me laugh more than it should have.