Is there an app for that?

Meanwhile, in an Iowa cornfield, Freqposter simply shakes his head and lets a single, lonely tear roll down his cheek and onto the bobbing head of a learned soccer mom.

 

Whoa whoa fucking whoa.

She's 62, and been with you 15 years?

If you're wanting to get latched onto her retirement benefits, just marry the old coot.

 

So....anal? I mean, I always hear once you turn 50..they get all concerned with the butt.

 

Brilliant

 

Was she a teacher?

 

I think the correct feminine term is "old biddy" or "old bat."

 

No, that's Poin's girlfriend.

 

And that would be Boots' girlfriend.

 

Dude, keep working your charm.
Your girl will take care of the rest.

 

While everyone is distracted by the second sentence, I'm still wondering about the first one.

 

From Alan Arkin as Grandpa in Little Miss Sunshine:

Grandpa: Can I give you some advice?

Dwayne: [shakes head "no"]

Grandpa: Well, I'm going to give it to you, anyway. I don't want you making the same mistakes I made when I was young. Dwayne, that's your name, right? Dwayne? Listen to me, this is the voice of experience talking. Are you listening? Fuck a lot of women, Dwayne.

Richard: Dad!

Grandpa: I got no reason to lie to you kid, fuck a lotta women. Not just one, a lot. So are you gettin' any? Is it going anywhere?

Dwayne: [shakes his head no]

Grandpa: No? Jesus! What are you? Fifteen? You should be gettin' that young stuff! That young stuff is the best stuff in the world!

 

A whole different kind of creepy.