'Is it ever OK to spank a child?'

No one fails to understand that.

Straw man.

To put this in the frame of physical/violent punishment more generally: One of my biggest issues with the death penalty has always been not that it's violent and out of control. But, rather, that it's sanitary and clinical. That's chilling, to me, in its own way. Same with dispassionate administration of corporal punishment.

 

I was spanked and have spanked. If I had it to do over again, I would choose, I think, not to spank my child. Mainly because I think there are better ways to get the message across, not because I look upon it as "child-beating" or anything like that.

I'm truly bothered by two things:

1. Those who tiptoe around discipline. "Now, Joey, if you don't stop that in 20 minutes, there's going to be the possibility of a timeout."

2. Those who think this is a black-and-white issue. This is SO not a black-and-white issue.

 

Flesh this out more.

Last night, my son was having a tantrum because he wanted to watch "10 more minutes" of "America's Next Ninja Warrior."

I said he had two choices: "Four minutes or zero minutes."

I spent probably 10 minutes giving him those two choices. I repeated them over and over again as he kept wailing, "10 minutes!"

I didn't think of myself as tiptoeing around discipline. I thought of myself as being patient and unyielding and showing that I could wait him out.

 

Also, I can't imagine a reason why anyone would have to spank a baby (under 2). Slap the hand or something like that, I get... But beyond that? No...

 

After reading the Thompson piece on Manziel, it sounds like he could have benefited from a spanking. Or at least some form of parental discipline.

 

Dick, there is nothing wrong with disciplining a child. Spanking is a form of discipline.

 

I'm trying to think of the times I've had to spank my kids, this is probably over the last 2-3 years...

My sons are 7 and 5. Very good kids, I'm blessed.

Oldest pushing youngest off the couch, fell backwards and came super close to hitting head on side of the couch...
Youngest ran into street.
Oldest put laundry basket over youngest and was sitting on it. (He could breathe, but it still freaked me out...)

 

So since there is nothing wrong with disciplining a child, any form of discipline is OK? That post is a logical mess.

 

Richard Dawkins says that religion is a form of child abuse.

Discuss.

 

Was he watching the show while all this was going on? You got worked, Pop!

I like your approach of getting down to eye level, holding shoulders, etc. Seems like a good way to communicate - strong eye contact, serious body language should get across the message pretty well. I'm working on my "stern" face.

That said, I would not nave been as patient. After offering him the choice of 4 minutes or zero minutes twice, maybe a third time, his answer of 10 minutes would have been the equivalent of answering zero minutes.

And Mizzou is absolutely right that spanking a baby is never OK. There is nothing my 15-month old can do that would deserve a swat on the bottom. I don't think he has the cognitive ability to understand it.

 

Not a straw man at all. We've had this discussion on SportsJournalists.com before and it was very clear that there are some people who don't get the distinction. between spanking and beating.

Regarding your last point, I'm not sure what you are advocating. Are you saying parents should be angry when they spank their children?

I'm not sure dispassionate is the right word. I would think parents would have an emotional response to having to discipline their child, especially a spanking, But it should be sadness or disappointment, not anger.

 

No, I'm saying that delivering it ritualistically does not necessarily absolve it of its bad traits. And that such a deliver system is fraught with some pitfalls of its own, potentially.