How will you spend tonight's SJ outage?

Good luck, everyone.

 

It appears the gerbils are dead. They didn't react well to the mixture of cocaine and Glee.

 

Good luck, everyone still with us.

 

I've already had some rum. Maybe I'll have more.

Coke and HGTV?

Annoying person on show: No. I don't like this 5,000 square foot split-level with pool and sex harness for $200K. My mother used to beat my ass with skis and would leave me exposed to the cold if I wanted to watch Heathcliff. So I have a thing for A-frame houses and I like to shove Lotta Pops in my orafices. (Orafi?) But no, I have no deep-seated childhood issues.

Care Bear on Coke: YOU FUCK! YOU HUMAN PIECE OF SHIT! Don't you realize you're giving up living space in an A-frame. Good luck fitting a king-sized bed and a bedroom set in your stupid A-frame bedroom you popiscle-addled fuck! No, wait. Don't go stick your pud in the snow, I'll help. (Snifffffffff, "I said god DAMN") Here, here, here, I've got Remax.com up. Let's go through listings! I could do this shit ALL NIGHT! Go get yourself a root beer Lotta Pop and do whatever it is you do, this could take a while. Gimme a taste! GIMME A FUCKING TASTE! No, not from the popsicle you freaking pervert ... the blow. GIMME THE FUCKING BLOW AND REMAX.COM!

Not for me.

More like weed and HGTV.

Bubbler on Weed: Lotta Pops are FUCKING AWESOME! Grape Ape!

 

Bubbler should have won funniest poster, hands down.

I have never actually tried cocaine. I now know how will I spend the next three hours. MYSELF ON COCAINE IS AWESOME.

 

I found myself feeling empty, as if I had a gaping hole in my chest.

As if I had requested sex and been denied, once again, for the umpteenth time in 13 unlucky years.

As if I were standing alone out in an empty cornfield.

Depressing.

 

Well, use your burn phone and your prepaid Visas, and hook up with Suzy

 

Our Wisconsin brethren have plenty of options when the site goes down.